The Secret Reasons He Left

He said he left because he needed to focus on sports, but that wasn’t all true. Boys tend to lie to protect their image, and that is just what he did. He didn’t tell you everything that was happening to him. 

He didn’t tell you his mom was sick. They didn’t know if she was going to beat the cancer. He would get home from school, when he was supposed to be at soccer practice, and he would go straight to see what he could do to help his mom. Everyday she would say tea would help take her pain away, so he would go to make her tea. She never liked it too hot, but never wanted it to be grainy. He knew exactly how to make it perfect for her because he has done it everyday after school since she’s been sick. He always made it hot enough for the tea to fully dissolve into the water, then he would place two ice cubes into the cup to cool it down. When he finally brings her the tea, he also  brings a cool wash cloth to lay upon her throbbing head. He would sit in there everyday doing his homework in case she ever needed him. 

He didn’t tell you his dad was a drunk. He would go out every night, and come home smelling like booze. His dad would come in causing a ruckus and wake him. His dad always came home mad, and he always thought it was because of his mom but he didn’t know it was because they were running out of money to pay for treatment. He would always help his dad to bed even if he gave him a black eye for it. His dad always says he doesn’t need help, but he knows he does. 

He didn’t tell you he was failing his classes. He knew his grades were important, but he couldn’t help but fall behind. He did his homework, but never really found the right answer. His teachers tried to offer him tutoring, but he never wanted to be away from his mom. Before his mom got sick, she would always help him with his homework, but now she can barely hold her tea. 

He didn’t tell you he lost the passion for soccer. He always watched the soccer games with his dad, and his dad would always practice with him in the yard. Now his dad goes out to bars. He doesn’t love the game like he used to. He can’t bring himself to try to get better. How could he care for the game with everything else going on? 

He didn’t tell you he’s slowly losing his job. He comes in late and leaves early. He knows he’s going to get in trouble, but he can’t help himself. His boss is mean. His coworkers make fun of him. He messes up the orders. He feels like he’s drowning. 

Despite all of this he has tried to put on a smiling face for you. He really does like you. He really does want to be with you, but he doesn’t want to hurt you. He is afraid to tell you about his hard life because he doesn’t want to be seen as vulnerable. He knows he can trust you, but he thinks you deserve better. He wasn’t trying to hurt you when he said he needed to focus on sports. He was trying to protect you. He would rather be seen as the bad guy than be seen as weak. Boys love to lie, but maybe, just maybe, they’re lying to protect themselves. Now, after he lost the best thing he’ll ever know, he cares for his mother and father, and he wonders everyday if he should have told you the truth. You go home and you cry because you really loved him, but believe me when I tell you that it wasn’t your fault.