Confirm and assess the interest.
No one knows your child like you do. You’ll know if he or she is interested in learning or playing. If your child shows an interest, ask questions about their interest: what do they like about music; are they interested in playing an instrument? Be mindful to ensure you aren’t unconsciously imposing your desires upon them.
“Are you signing your kid up for music lessons because you want him/her to explore his/her musicality, or because you are trying to check a box for college admissions?” asks guitar and vocal instructor Timothy Garry (Timmy G). “I am not interested in teaching the latter, and in fact you will crush your child's natural creativity and talent with such an approach,” he cautions. “Let your child explore music and develop their skill at their own pace.”
While that developmental journey may take your child down an unfamiliar road, proper professional guidance will ensure it is well-paved. Piano instructor Sin Silver explains, “If your child has a good teacher, they will keep the lines of communication open with you about how to help and what’s expected. You absolutely do not need to be musically inclined for your child to learn.”
Garry underscores that once the exploration begins, the guessing part on how to proceed usually comes to an end, saying ”if the talent and interest is there, the passion will take over.”
Don’t rush them.
Guitar instructor Nicholas Lyon-Wright urges not to start your kids too young. “Starting young is great if the inspiration is there because you get ahead of the game on some things, but I don't think it's great to force [music lessons] too much.”
“I don’t like to start kids too young because I want them to feel super empowered and confident,” says Silver. “I like to wait until 6 years old. Sometimes I will start at 5 if the maturity and concentration level is there.”
Vocal instructor Nancy Lake stresses the importance of that maturity, adding that the student “be interested and ready to pay attention. Sometimes this means the student is 8, and sometimes it means they are 48.”
Lyon-Wright elaborates that the right time is “when you're excited and inspired by what you're learning; that, to me, is the best time to start learning music.”
Ensure an outlet.
Performance adds another component in your young musician’s development. It builds self-confidence and can even strengthen socialization skills. The personal joy taken from performance is often shared in communal ways.
“It's always best when there's a real love and enjoyment of singing [or playing] on the students' part, while also having a way to perform or share the music, whether in theater, choir, church, band, etc,” says Lake.
Share the enthusiasm.
“Listen to your kids' music, play more music that you like, make music a part of daily life,” says Lake. “There is nothing more positive and beautiful than sharing music with other people, especially your kids!”
Talk to your kids about your relationship with music, memories you have of concerts you’ve been to, and - perhaps most invaluable - whatever music history you are familiar with.
“I've increasingly found that kids today know next to NOTHING about music history,” laments Garry. He went to explain that ”kids need inspiration and heroes” and that music history - even the somewhat recent - is loaded with iconic figures to keep your kids inspired.
“They need to listen to more music,” says guitar instructor Vince Lay. “ All of my students who do better than the average listen to music regularly.”
Listening to music regularly - even if just in the background - isn’t very common these days in many households. If there isn't much music playing in your home, make efforts to change that. This doesn’t mean you need to invest in a state-of-the-art home stereo system; maybe you just play the radio more often or get in the habit of asking your smart speaker to play music (via streaming services) while doing household chores.
“The BEST thing you can do is listen to a lot of music at home and teach your child about the kinds of music you like! Inspire them - don't make music a chore!“ adds Garry.