JLW

Stuck In The Middle

Too autistic for the neurotypical world and too high-masking for the autistic world.

I am stuck in the middle.

I live on the margin, the fence, the line. 

At times, I found it hard to shine.

In places that support autistic/neurodivergent people, but they aren’t where the decisions are made. 

I need to be where the decisions are made. 

We need to be where the decisions are made.

I am one of  68.1 million autistic people and counting.

I am counting on them.

We count on each other.

We are in this together.

Together we advocate for acceptance and action. 

A day when all kids attend their school of residence.

The program/support you need doesn’t determine the quality of learning.

Switching schools multiple times in one year is rare. 

No one stops and stares.

“Do things weird” for all I care. 

No longer a margin or a fence to stride.

The middle is where we reside.

No need to explain the complexities of our brain.

We let go of our performance and the strain.

The work is the purpose, the connection is real. We are 68 million; this is how many of us feel.

Free Verse

Learning Comes Alive 

Learning comes alive when all means all.

All of the students, together.

In class.

At the flag salute.

With other kids at recess. 

Playing, running, rolling, TJ searching for bugs.

After, he tells the class about trantulas and black widows. 

Friends are made.

Learning comes alive 

When adults become allies to students.

And see them for who they are.

Unique humans with much promise.

More than a number.

A name on a roster.

Another IEP meeting.

A statistic.

Another box, checked off the list.

Young souls, with promise. 

Free Verse

I Am…

I am JLJ, always have been, always will be.

God made me, me.

He knit me together in my mother's womb.

I am the black sheep of the family.

I own it.

I am “JLJ” for a reason.

Everyone else is taken.

 I’m learning more every day, every reflection.

And redirection.

I am the reason they say, “Ooo, what’s cooking?” when they come into the kitchen.

I am JLJ, writing, gaming, and working.

Words reach the brick wall between my brain and mouth.

I write to get it all out.

I hum the Imperial March when I write.

Shake my leg.

And keep at it.

I find a connection in every match and page.

I bring the strategy of the game and the lived experiences into the rewarding, messy work of education.

I am here

   Sitting in college classes, presenting at conferences, and helping out at church.

I am an autistic face in a neurotypical space.

Not just existing, but leading.

I am the “Them” that became the “Us.”

I am spicy, I said, “I have the pencil, now give me the blueprint.”

No “expert” gets to define my future.

I don’t need “pity.” 

I am JLJ, here to tell you autism is not a fate worse than death.

I am not a burden.

I am different, not less.

Ready to make a difference.

Cure abelism, not autism.

I will be autistic until my last breath.

I don’t just take up space; I redefine it.

I don’t just find the path; I help align it.

So, watch me work.

Watch me write. 

Watch me lead.

Not just in positions, as an example.

Free Verse

“Your Face Is The One I want To See” - Mrs.Reeves

Your face is the one I want to see.

Succeding

At school.

In class. 

And beyond.

Your face is the one I want to see.

As we pass through the halls.

I see you, that’s certain. 

I see your hard work.

Your hand raised, ready to ask questions.

The spark in your eyes.

Desire in your heart.

That you come to school tired.

You are in the awkward phase.

It may not be fun right now, that’s ok.

There is joy in the learning. 

Joy in the awkward.

The anger and frustration will pass.

Be wise and “Let it be” while you search for the right answer.

Soon, you will find it.

Just like the ocean, you’ll be in motion.

Night and day, paving the way to days that shine brighter.

Your face is the one I want to see.

Successful.

Thriving.

Please visit Room 1 often.

You will always have a seat at the table.

Because your face is the one I want to see.

Free Verse

Education

Education gives us knowledge.

Knowledge is power.

No one can take it away.

We give, and give.

Sometimes we need to take. 

Today is a day the Educator got Educated.

It’s disappointing. 

A balance of joy and grief. 

Holding space for the hard.

Without losing our light.

And speaking up and out.

There are days we feel alone.

Together we have power.

Together in community education is our responsibility. 

Free Verse