The Failed Pilots by Total Television (1964-66)

Total Television is a mixed bag of a company. While in the shadow of the more fondly remembered Jay Ward cartoons, Total Television is still responsible for some great cartoons like Underdog and Tennessee Tuxedo. And while the cartoons they released can pass the test of “my grandpa remembers them” what isn’t as well known is their failed pilots, Gene Hattree in “The Trap” and Cauliflower Cabby in “Introducing the Champ” from 1964 and 1966 respectively. 

In The Trap (1964), the Parchesi Junction First Nation Bank is robbed by Tortilla Fats and his gang of crooks. A small white rabbit named Deputy Rabbitfoot is ready to hunt them down, much to the dismay of Sheriff Gene Hattree, a guitar playing horse, who claims “Catching crooks is for sheriffs, sweepings for deputies.” While Gene is off to catch Tortilla Fats, Rabbitfoot learns from the townsfolk that Tortilla and his gang ran away without the money, Rabbitfoot finds this as the perfect opportunity to set up traps. While on the hunt for Tortilla, Gene’s terrible singing causes Tortilla and his gang to open fire, ruining Gene’s new hat and sending him back to town to get a new one. But on his way back, Rabbitfoots’ new trap is triggered by Gene instead of Tortilla, injuring Gene and embarrassing Rabbitfoot. Meanwhile, Tortilla and his two goons are just now figuring out they forgot the money, causing them to run back to town, not before being seen by Gene Hattree. Once again, Rabbitfoot’s new trap is triggered by Gene and not Tortilla. This angers Rabbitfoot, swearing that if he “could just get face to face with that Tortilla Fats”, before being cut off Tortilla Fats himself and getting punched into a barrel of water. Gene free’s his way out of Rabbitfoot’s trap and crushes Tortilla Fats and his gang while also retrieving the money. Once again proving that “catching crooks is for sheriffs, sweepings for deputies.”

This short wasn’t that bad for Total Television standards. But it’s not hard to see the connections to this and Quick Draw McGraw with a guitar playing, cowboy horse. The mexican stereotypes are also pretty bad but don’t bring down the short that much. It was also cool to hear a new rendition of the Tennessee Tuxedo theme being used for this short and the gag about Gene having 1000 spare hats was funny. Overall this short wasn’t that bad, it being good enough to be a full series is debatable. 

6/10 

Sadly can’t say the same thing about Introducing the Champ (1966). This short opens just like the last one with a poor man’s Riff Raff named Boston Bully robbing the Kennel Bank before fleeing in an invisible car and robbing another bank. Pulling up to the bank is our protagonist and a poor man’s Underdog, Cauliflower Cabby, who is trampled by Bully and his goons. Cauliflower gets berated by Pinkyknees, who to no one’s surprise is a poor man’s Polly Purebred, who wishes Cauliflower was as brave and powerful as the local superhero, The Champion. Little to Pinky’s knowledge, Cauliflower actually is The Champion, “Guardian of life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness.” Upon Cauliflower’s transformation to The Champion, his taxi transforms into a high-tech supercar with jets, which he uses to catch up to Boston Bully at his next heist. A high speed chase with The Champion and Boston Bully pursuits, the invisible car befuddles The Champion and causes him to swerve all over the road. This is when our first part ends. 

 Our next part picks up right where we left off. Boston Bully’s invisible car drives through a mud pit, causing it to be visible once again. The Champion starts firing shots at the car, leaving the Bully to rush to his garage and repaint the car with invisible paint. With The Champion off their tail, Boston Bully and his gang decide to kidnap Pinkyknee’s. This puts The Champion into a fit of absolute rage, which seems to be his only real superpower, and causes him to drive recklessly through the streets of town and while chasing after Boston Bully. This sends Boston Bully crashing into a closed road sign. Before The Champion can catch him, he points a gun a Pinkyknee’s head. The Champion distracts Bully by telling him the police are behind him. A brawl ensues and Boston Bully is defeated by The Champion.

For lack of a better term, this short is a piece of shit. As you can tell by the way I write this, this short is a shameless ripoff of Underdog. This story could so easily be retold with Underdog, Polly Purebred and Riff Raff, that it makes me wonder why this was even made. The writing is also unbelievably bad, every character speaks like they’re talking to preschoolers. I can’t imagine anyone that even worked on this short would like it.

2/10 - Smiledude

These failed pilots would later be seen on 70’s syndicated versions of The Underdog Show. I would love to hear what people thought about seeing these characters once and then never again. And if you’re willing to sit through these shorts today, they are easily available on YouTube. 

Peter Puck: How to Play the Game (2007, Peace Arch)

Peter Puck: How to Play the Game is a 2007 DVD released by Peace Arch, featuring all 9 shorts featuring the character, Peter Puck. For those who don’t know who Peter Puck here’s a short history lesson on the character. In 1973, NBC and CBC wanted a character that could explain hockey to kids and dumbass americans. Hanna Barbera was hired to create shorts featuring a hockey puck with Rayman-esqe unattached limbs that would skate around the ice and explain the rules, give tips, and talk about the history of hockey. Even though Peter had been a walk-around mascot for hockey games before the shorts first aired on TV, these new cartoons helped Peter Puck become an icon, for hockey fans in the 60’s at least. This year marks Peter Puck’s 50th anniversary.

It’s hard to call Peter Puck a show, at most it’s just commercial filler. Peter is the only character besides unnamed hockey players. Shorts don’t really have titles either so the fact that the DVD gives them any is pretty surprising. The menu is as bland as you would expect it to be, same art and text as the cover with two menu options, “Play All” or “Episode Selections” played over 8 second audio of Peter Puck from one of the shorts, followed by silence. Upon selecting “Episode Selections” you will be brought to a menu that has the same art and text as the back cover with episode titles placed over. 

Despite the fact that the original masters for every Peter Puck short survive, this DVD uses old tape masters that either look too blue or too red. Sometimes film scratches are visible. But this is still the best and only way to watch these cartoons. Each short is around 3-5 minutes long and usually features Peter discussing hockey in a way that is visually interesting to kids. The humor is usually corny, but I would be lying if I said Peter getting whacked around like hell by hockey players didn’t make me laugh. Animations have the typical Hanna Barbera cheapness to them and Peter’s simple design and reused animation probably saved some time and money. But what these shorts do accomplish is being able to explain the game of hockey in a fun and humorous manner. I know next to nothing about hockey and still had some fun watching these. Learning about how much the Stanley cup was neglected and abused by winners was very surprising and funny. 

Overall, as a DVD this is probably the most lazy and boring thing I’ve reviewed so far. But as a collection of Peter Puck cartoons, it’s the only one we’ll ever get so we might as well enjoy it. 6/10 - Smiledude

If you would like to view the DVD or these cartoons for yourself CLICK HERE.

The Woody Woodpecker Show: Spook-A-Nanny (1964)

The Woody Woodpecker Show: Spook-a-Nanny, or just simply Spook-a-Nanny is a special Halloween themed episode of the 60’s Woody Woodpecker Show. The special, much like the show itself, features original bridging animation with older theatrical cartoons in between, as well as shameless Kellogs plugs. But what sets this episode apart from others is that it contains a brand new original short made for the show, the only time that ever happened.

The special starts the same way with Woody pecking the name of the show into a tree before falling into Walter Lantz’s office. Mr. Lantz, as all refer to him as for the rest of this review, is wearing a creepy mask that scares Woody. Mr. Lantz reminds Woody that it’s Halloween and that they’ll be throwing a party for all of their “friends.” After a commercial break, Woody comes flying in a broom, popping every balloon in sight. He is now tasked to blow up every balloon that he popped for the party. And while Woody is busy doing that, Mr. Lantz shows us a cartoon.

The cartoon that plays is actually one of my favorite Woody Woodpecker shorts and it actually works quite well in this special. The half Matlock, half Superman parody, Under the Counter Spy. A dangerous criminal known as “The Bat” has stolen a top secret formula that can make anyone who drinks it the strongest human being in the world. While The Bat is on the run he places it in an apartment window whilst he finds a place to hide, but when he grabs the bottle back, he takes the wrong one. Leaving the powerful tonic in the hands of Woody Woodpecker. It just so happens that Woody is in the worst state he could possibly be, too weak to even squeeze out toothpaste, so he takes what he thinks is his usual tonic. Woody becomes immensely powerful, but only for so long. A news flash comes on, warning people about The Bat and the stolen tonic. Woody must bring the bottle immediately to the BFI office. But the clever bat leads him in the wrong direction, sending him to an abandoned house to murder him and take the bottle. Of course, Woody’s powerful self can’t be killed, leading to one of the most badass scenes in animation history where Woody physically stops a bomb from exploding with his hands. Woody stops the criminal but brings the wrong bat and bottle to the police.

We come back to Woody who is still trying to blow up balloons with a new technique that sends him flying across the room, with more balloons to blow up we go to another cartoon. In the not scary, not Halloween themed, Playful Pelican. Thanks to this special, this is the best way to watch this short so I guess that’s a plus. Andy Panda is cleaning his boat when a sleeping pelican gets in his way. A throws the pelican overboard until he finds out the bird had an egg, Andy is now the mother of a baby pelican. That’s kind of about it, they almost get eaten by a shark but not much happens besides that, it’s just ok.

We come back to Woody who is talking with Mr. Lantz about all of the characters that will be coming to the party, from the well known to Homer Pigeon, who Woody somehow knows. After all the work Woody has done, Mr. Lantz lets Woody run off to the party in a makeshift ghost costume. This leads to the special’s original short, Spook-a-Nanny, very original name too. This short is very special because it contains some of the first uses of some of these characters since the 40’s and 50’s. Woody makes his way to the house the party is in, but his asshole friends won’t stop pulling tricks on him. Woody decides to disguise himself amongst a group of Beatles inspired, hippie ghosts and get into the party. The ghost freaks everybody out including Chilly Willy who smashes every ghost and Woody with a mallet. When the gang finds out Woody is here they all egg him on to perform a song, what’s the name of this song? Spook-a-Nanny of course! The lyrics of the song describe the horrors of Halloween and the tricks people play. When the song is over, Woody gives us one last scare before shorts end. We come back to Mr. Lantz who gives us a little PSA about being nice on Halloween, I would be lying if I said this wasn’t sweet. Woody performs the song one more time before another Kellog’s plug and then the credits.

This special honestly wasn’t the worst. While a special that mostly reused content doesn't sound that fun I actually had a good time watching. The original short had fine animation and a great song that gets stuck in my head all the time, my biggest complaint is the character designs Andy looks more Mickey Mouse like than the ever has and Homer Pigeon looks less like a Pigeon and more little hispanic child with a pigeon beak. That didn’t stop the special from delivering some pretty funny gags for a 60’s Walter Lantz cartoon. Overall I’d give this special a 6/10. - Smiledude02

If you would like to watch this special, it is available on the Woody Woodpecker and Friends Halloween Favorites DVD.  Rips of the DVD are Internet Archive courtesy of our own, Cartoony Julio. Click Here

Teen Titans Go!: Warner Bros. 100th Anniversary (2023)

Finally, Warner Bros. gives me a reason to watch Teen Titans Go again! On a truly wondrous September 23rd of 2023, the WB 100 themed episode of the long-running series TTG was DEFINITELY released to the masses! It was TOTALLY not replaced with another WB 100 themed episode of the long-running series TTG, that would be simply preposterous! If I’m being honest, I never really planned on watching this episode at first, but when some circumstances occurred that FOR SURE had nothing to do with this episode getting unaired on cable and only being released through on demand services, I knew that I had to check it out! So does it hold up? Is it worth watching it in a very accessible way that doesn’t invoke the wrath of god in WB? Let’s find out!

SPOILERS TIME

The special begins with the Titans preparing to party as a result of Warner Bros’ 100th anniversary, when Robin tells the gang that they are going to have to lead security for the event, mostly out of obligation. After many scenes of cameos of characters from other WB-owned properties, jokes involving those said WB-owned properties and a tour of the lot, the Titans show off the famous WB shield, claiming that it holds all of the magic within the studio. Then everybody’s favorite failed broadcast network mascot, Michigan J. Frog, breaks the shield into three pieces, destroying the studio lot, as a result of him not being invited to the party. It’s now up for the Titans, Daffy Duck, Yogi Bear and two Mogwai's to save the day. They go through three different worlds to acquire the pieces, Hogwarts, a giant version of the Friends fountain, and the filming location for all of the big blockbuster films. After many interactions with cameos of characters from other WB-owned properties, they come face to face with Michigan himself, now in a giant size as a result of the big blockbuster film budgets. After a fight with Michigan and a giant robot helmed by the one smart Mogwai from the second Gremlins movie which I still haven’t seen, they get the third piece, but unfortunately, this does nothing, and the magic of the big corporate conglomerate is seemingly lost forever. But with the magic of chanting out your company’s slogan and turning into buff superheroes, ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE! They defeat Michigan, who accepts his defeat and inability of being invited to parties, and the studio comes back to life. The special ends with Robin being chased by all of the characters, as it turns out that Michigan was on the guest list for the event the entire time. Hooray for neglectfulness! 

So, what did I think of the special? Well, I can say that it was better than I thought it would be. Daffy was definitely the MVP here, I really enjoyed all of the interactions he had with Robin, and he felt very in character. I also liked seeing Yogi in a lead role, but he was kind of just there. Most people are probably annoyed with the decision to make Michigan a villain, but I honestly thought his portrayal was pretty solid. He didn't really have much of a character to begin with in his original cartoon, so I didn't see it as a big issue. The other appearances from the various WB characters were fine, for the most part they don’t really do anything, which I think everyone expected. There’s a few gags with them, mostly the LT characters, but that’s really it. I think my least favorite aspect of this was the ending. Seeing the main cast recite the motto of WBD like they’re in a cult felt extremely lame, cheesy and corporate. In general, I also feel like they kind of just did the bare minimum here. We could've gotten a separate animated short a la Disney's upcoming "Once Upon a Studio", that celebrates the company's legacy in a much more meaningful way, but I digress. This was also more of a nitpick if anything, but I swear they mentioned Friends way too much. As someone who has never watched more than a few minutes of that program, I have felt no urge to actually sit through an entire episode after seeing it shoved in my face like, three different times. Overall though, this special was just fine. I don’t think it was the best way to celebrate this company’s legacy, but I suppose it could’ve been worse. Check it out if you want to see Daffy doing things I guess, 5/10 - SunsetTheStupid

Tiny Toons Looniversity: Freshman Orientoontion (2023)

I’ll just come right out and admit it, I’ve barely seen anything from Tiny Toons Adventures. Overall I’ve only seen about 2 episodes, and because of that I wasn’t that excited for this new reboot. It wasn’t until Comic Con in 2022 when I got mildly intrigued. And then when trailers dropped this year with Lola Bunny and Seven Arts characters was when I realized that I need to watch this show. While the show didn’t premiere till September 8 on Cartoon Network, episode 7 was dropped on Streaming services and on Cartoon Network’s YouTube channel which was a really odd choice in my opinion. I watched the first episode this morning.

The first episode, Freshman Orientoontion, starts with Yosemite Sam opening the gates to ACME Looniversity, a university taught by Classic Looney Tunes characters. Buster and Babs arrive by way of digging an underground tunnel, and with only 2 wrong turns at Albuquerque. Buster informs Babs about all the fun they can have at ACME Loo, until they are horrified to find out they will have different dorms, Buster will be staying a Fudd Hall with Plucky Duck and Hampton while Babs will be staying at Merrie Melodies with Sweetie Bird. Buster and Plucky have a fight over the top of the bunk bed while Hampton tries to make them laugh so he can live up to his mom's legacy as a world class comedian. The first day of class starts and the toons are assigned with a project, come up with the best gag in 1 week, whoever wins will get their picture hung up in the Freshman Hall of Fame. Buster and Plucky if one of them gets a better grade than the other, they can get top bunk. Buster teaches Hampton how to be funny so he can live up to his mom. Babs and Sweetie have a talk with the dean, Granny, to let Buster and Babs share a dorm. Granny tell Babs “ACME Loo is a place where toons come to discover themselves as individuals.” But just to make Babs happy she challenges her to an arm wrestle, if Babs wins her and Buster can share a dorm. Meanwhile, the competition for the best gag is going on. Meanwhile, Buster has to perform his best gag and realizes he spent so much time training Hampton that he has no funny gags to perform. Babs lets Granny win the arm wrestle when she realizes Sweetie is so cool and would love spending the next 4 years with her. Babs runs to the auditorium before Buster can perform and the two of them start doing a huge dance number with reused animation from the opening which really isn’t funny and can’t really count as a gag, but they get great scores anyway so what do I know? Up next is Hampton, who is under so much stress that he cries and yells about how he’s not funny. Somehow everyone thinks this is the funniest shit in the world and Hampton gets a perfect score and his photo in the Freshman Hall of Fame. The episode ends with a 80’s dance number at the Loo Bru.

This first episode was ok. I was really confused about the gag competition because it felt like it was just a dance contest. I also kinda felt like animators were trying to hard to make crazy ass faces, I get it's for comedy but it felt every scene had one. There’s a chance that this show will actually turn out to be good, I’ve heard that the original Tiny Toons had a slow start too. But it’s probably not a good thing that I’m mostly excited because character cameos.  6/10 - Smiledude

Hammy's Nutty-Fun DVD! (2006, Dreamworks)

Hammy's Nutty Fun DVD is a 2006 DVD released only in Walmart with Over The Hedge. This is actually the first non-Public Domain DVD review I've done on this site and I'm very excited because I love Over The Hedge, especially Hammy the Squirrel. And I'm sure many others did because Dreamworks put out this bonus disc called Hammy's Nutty Fun including 4 seasons of activities. 

The disc starts out with an animation of Hammy running on screen, burping, then walking away. Next two of the creepy annoying ass porcupine kids running around with Verne's shell and playing monkey in the middle before Stella threatens the two porcupines by uncomfortably pointing her ass at the two. If you select one of the seasons, an animation of Hammy running up and shaking the camera to transition into a menu of selections next to stock images of characters in the movie. If you look at the back on DVD, most selections are only accessible if you have a PC with a disc drive, so if you select anything that's not the 3 things you can play on this disc, you'll get a big fat fuck you screen saying you have to insert the disc in a computer. The one thing you can play in Halloween section is Hammy Dance, a fake rhythm game that you can't control, the only thing you can do is pretend to control Hammy while listening to MIDI Techo, Salsa and Swing music. If you do have a disc drive then you can play Virual Hammy, a game where all you can do if pick up Hammy, make him sleep, scare him with a garden gnome and feed him a cookie, super bland and not woth your time. Holiday, that's right Holiday not Winter, is a Bear Cam Weblink, Activision Game Demo and Hammy's Holiday Festivities. The Bear Cam Weblink sadly does not work anymore but it would be pretty cool to see for some kids that couldn't go to a zoo. The Activision Game Demo is hella cool, you can play some of the PC port of the Over The Hedge Video Game and I would be lying if I said this wasn't kinda fun. Spring is definitely the most intresting of the seasons for people that don't have PCs with disc drives as you get two whole things to watch! First is Hammy's Boomerang Adventure a fully animated short about RJ trolling Hammy with a bunch of boomerangs much to the dismay of Verne, and Over the Boomerang, an almost 4 minutes documentary about Hammy and the creation of Boomerang Adventure featuring Steve Carell. Then finally there's Summer, Burp Your ABC's is a very intresting game where you type a letter that's falling from the sky so that you can make Hammy burp, you can even email a friend about it of you want! You've probably noticed have I've refrained from talking about a few of the options on the DVD, well that's because all they are are print outs, stupid shit that you can print out as decorations or for activities if you really love wasting expensive printer ink on Over The Hedge wrapping paper. 

Overall this disc is extremely lackluster. What I would do was make Hammy's Boomerang Adventure and the documentary a part of the main Over The Hedge DVD and make the printables just a bonus CD included in the case, though no one would care about those anyway. The crazy thing is that you can still find this DVD separately from the main Over The Hedge DVD pn eBay and a second hand stores, I got my copy at a local thrift store, which is honestly just sad. Even as a bonus disc this is pretty shit. 3/10 - Smiledude02 

But if you still want to check this out for the game demo and probably nothing else, powerKitten has posted the ISO here.

Mighty Mouse and Friends (1986, Kid Pics)

Mighty Mouse and Friends is a 1986 VHS released by Kid Pics. You might know Kid Pics for their exploitative Kids Club featuring Alvin and The Chipmunks wannabes, The Happy Hamsters, in which you could win free prizes like VHS tapes and having your child’s information sent to pedophiles. Well before all of that they were just another company that made VHS tapes, this tape in particular featuring 4 cartoons. The art work is very simple, ok art of Mighty Mouse with honestly cool title art.The back is simpler no fun art, (unless you count the logo), just the track listing and copyright info.

The tape starts off immediately at the first cartoon, no logo, no “Adjust your Tracking”, nothing. The first short is Wolf! Wolf! A Terrytoons short where Mighty Mouse rescues a baby lamb for four sly wolves, this short has that typical Terrytoons niche of being just ok, I do like the music though. The next short is An Itch in Time, a Merrie Melodies short about a flea terrorizing Elmer Fudd’s dog, I love this short, all the gags are great but this short is an odd inclusion for 2 reasons. 1. It’s not in the public domain, unlike every other short presented on this VHS this cartoon still holds copyright so it’s technically illegal to be featured. And 2. The weird and terrible censorship attempt by Kid Pics. The cartoon ends with Elmer’s cat shooting himself in the head after witnessing the flea carrying Elmer and the dog on a plate, most tv airings of this short cut that part out but it’s rarely censored on home media. Here is the censorship job (Courtesy of MrServoRetro). Next there’s Chicken A La King, a Fleischer Color Classic about an Arab Chicken King dueling with an Aladin-like Duck over a sexy American Goose, pretty good. And lastly there’s Little Boy Blue, an Ub Iwerks Comi-Color short taken from a Castle Films print in which it’s retitled The Big Bad Wolf, pretty good but similar to Disney’s Three Little Wolves. Much like the beginning, the tape ends right after Little Boy Blue ends, (if counting the nothingness of the film print).

One last note, every short on this tape looks slightly green, I don't know if thath's a problem with just my copy or if everyone's copy looks like that. Overall this tape is very average, might be worth picking up just for An Itch in Time. 5/10 - Smiledude02