My Story...

My drinking career started back in the 90's when I was a teenager... much like the rest of the universe.  It starting out rebelling at a young age, drinking at the age of 12/13 when I was in elementary school.  My friends and I drank on the weekends for fun... rarely getting caught.  Money was never a problem... I had a paper route and always had money and was never hard pressed to afford a bottle.

Progressing through high-school, drinking was still only a weekend thing.  Friday and Saturday nights turned into "drinking nights" for all of my friends. Older, younger ?? It didn't matter.  Always had someone old enough to get and always had money (now working the paper route and a part-time fast food job).  I started paying for other friends' share of the "pot" for the bottles... because that meant we couldn't drink.  Our school yard, building forts and having bonfires in the bush, a friend's house whose parents worked shift work... it didn't matter the location, we just drank.

Later in my late teens, I found the bars! I LOVE pOp music, so bars and clubs with dance music and alcohol? I was all in! in the late 90's and early 2000's, I was able to cross the river to the USA.  I was hanging out with older adults, so going across turned into an every weekend activity! In also being a college student, that was the focus... drinking every single night after school and on the weekends! Hell... we would day drink in the afternoon and then go to evening classes! It was the norm with everyone, especially in graduating a hospitality program!

In graduating from college, my life turned into chaos.  I flurry of bad decisions, life problems, physical Health issues all led to my daily use of alcohol.  Stress was a big factor in not taking care of myself, but making sure that my family and friends were okay with no regard for myself.

My late 20's, my 30's and early 40's was survival for me.  Housing needs, mental health, financial health.... almost every spoke of my life balance wheel was constantly lighting on fire and putting each fire out led to another bad string of decisions.  In having gastric bypass surgery in my late 20's, there was a solid 6 months of sobriety as I was not able to consume alcohol as directed by my doctors.

in my period of sobriety after the surgery, I definitely developed jealousy and fear of missing out that my other friends were able to drink, so i started dabbling back into alcohol.  In my early 30's to my mid 40's, i was a full blown, "functioning" alcoholic.  In putting out the daily and weekly fires in my life, alcohol was a way to cope, numb and "sleep".  Working multiple jobs, getting into a relationship with another addict, the introduction of illicit drug use combined with my drinking, continued to make my life chaos.  Losing jobs, losing days, constantly hungover and filled with brain fog, i started working on sobriety and seeking help in my early 40's.

Being a frequent flyer in the detox system, no aftercare was provided after leaving detox.  with the opening of Northway Wellness & Treatment Centre  i became a "piece of the furniture" at the centre, even going to detox 3 times in one month!  AFTERCARE was huge in me trying to beat MY addiction.  Northway provided excellent aftercare plans and provided a program called "A New Day" which offered my first experience in a "rehab" program.  It is an "IOP" which allowed for programming during the day and then allowed us to leave in the evenings for reflection, working on ourselves and also offered the ability to work, make money, and still recover! 

In committing to sobriety, I slowly built my "sober" team.  Referrals to the Addictions treatment centre, CMHA for life counselling and case management for housing, involvement in the RaaM clinic with CMHA and Sault area Hospital, slips/lapses were part of the game and i learned from every single one.  In my connection  with the Canadian mental health association, my support team referred me to smart recovery and completely changed and saved my life!

I am now a SMART Recovery abassador and facilitator and always trying my best to lead a sober, healthy and balanced life.  I have given up my career in hospitality.  Focusing on my own sobriety, i came to the revaltion that my lived expierence can help others, which led to me going back to school at 46 years old and taking the addictions and mental health program at CTS Canadian Career college. Upon graduation with my diploma and my experience with SMART Recovery, I know i can help the addictions and mental health crisis in my city and offer a new way to recover.... with smart recovery and my diploma, i am truly motivated to get out there and help people get the help they need!    ❤️ 🦏