Commentaries

The commentaries on this page were authored by Rick Rodington.

We must rescue abused children

April was designated as National Child Abuse Prevention Month in 1983. The dynamics pertaining to this atrocious crime are extremely intricate, due to the complexity of the psyche, which is the personality, the totality of elements forming the mind. Consequently, this matter is much more complicated than a problem of stressed parents who project their anger on defenseless young children. Everyone must cope with stress, but some individuals, who possess serious psychological issues, cannot control their emotions and thus react in an inappropriate, aggressive manner.

Few people understand the dynamics that are involved in this horrendous problem. I believe all child abusers are bullies and master manipulators and that their abuse thrives on vulnerability, fear, intimidation, manipulation, complicity, secrecy, denial and shame. We must fight this scourge with revelation, truth, courage, the social services departments, the police and the law courts. 

Let's consider a certain dysfunctional household, where the father is emotionally and physically abusive to the two youngest children while the mother enables him with her acquiescence. Both have a proclivity to make impulsive, emotional decisions, rather than ones based on common sense, reason and logic. They are ultra-sensitive, excitable and easily provoked. Psychologists would say the parents are emotionally immature. In fact, in the Ask Amy advice column on May 27, 2022, Amy Dickinson noted, "It never ceases to amaze me that some adults can look at children who are obviously distressed - and not adjust their adult behavior."

The patriarch's temperament is narcissistic, arrogant, aggressive, manipulative, irritable, obstinate and impetuous. He’s uninhibited, says and does whatever he pleases, has no shame, and nobody can reason with him. In his youth, he liked to taunt his siblings and hurt their feelings. He always puts himself first, makes everything in the family revolve around him and does almost all decision-making. He adamantly opposes equality of the sexes and believes a woman’s true place is in the kitchen. Since he doesn't like youngsters, he has poor interpersonal relationships with his children and shows little interest in, or concern, for them. They perceive him as cranky, distant and self-absorbed. Because he's highly strung and has a proclivity to rush to conclusions and overreact to even minor frustration, they need to be very careful not to upset him. They fear his outbursts of foul language and temper tantrums, which happen quite often and usually for a trivial reason. 

The matriarch has an inferiority complex, is low in confidence and self-esteem and is very insecure. Also, she has a deep-seated fear of rejection. She believes whatever she wants and habitually engages in denial and wishful thinking. These psychological problems result in her making poor decisions; particularly in regard to her choice of a tyrannical, misogynistic mate, whom she adores. Although the woman admires dominant, egocentric males, she fears the violent temper of her husband and eldest son, and allows them to intimidate and manipulate her. She never shows any reaction to their abuse of the two other children. At home, she toils like a beast of burden because they won't help her with any household chores. She believes their assertion that men aren't supposed to do housework, and is oblivious to their exaggerated machismo, while they take her hard work for granted.

There's truth to the proverb that love is blind. According to phrases.org.uk: “Modern-day research supports the view that the blindness of love is not just a figurative matter. A research study in 2004 by University College London found that feelings of love suppressed the activity of the areas of the brain that control critical thought.” 

In this toxic environment, the eldest child is an entitled son, who amazingly, is never abused or disciplined and is allowed to do whatever he wants. The boy has the same undesirable character traits as his father, whom he uses as a role model, except that he’s also vindictive and sadistic. He considers himself superior to everyone, never has anything nice to say and habitually makes sardonic remarks and insulting innuendos. His teachers dislike him. He cleverly manipulates his parents, who treat him with the utmost respect, trust him implicitly, defend his bad behavior and disregard any criticism of him. Despite their favoritism, he doesn’t appreciate anything they do for him. Similar to his dad, he exists in a world of his own, is domineering and always wants to be the center of attention. He has poor interpersonal relationships with family members and gleefully bullies his much younger brother and sister. Incomprehensibly, the parents condone his bullying, even though it’s overtly brazen and malicious.

Those who weren’t abused in childhood cannot possibly conceptualize what it's really like to live in fear at home. At any moment, the defenseless young victims could be belittled, shouted at, or assaulted. Their nightmare world is frightening, degrading, dehumanizing and traumatic. They cannot believe these wicked things are happening to them, or understand why, and they suffer much more psychologically than physically. Furthermore, these distressed children have no idea what it’s like to live in a home with emotionally healthy people. 

In the certain dysfunctional household, the greatest desire of the traumatized boy and girl is to end their misery by getting away from their cruel father and older brother. They wish to be removed from that abominable environment and be placed in a safe, stable home, preferably with other relatives. They yearn for, and deserve, the opportunity to be treated with respect, and to live in dignity and without fear. For them, these requirements are more crucial than living with their parents, which isn't worth the trauma involved. For now, they are well-behaved and aren’t using their parents as role models. However, time will tell if this remains the case.

Deplorably, the brutal and senseless problem of child abuse has existed since the dawn of humanity. Reflecting his keen judgment about human nature, Albert Einstein opined, "The world is a dangerous place. Not because of the people who are evil; but because of the people who don't do anything about it." You can help, if you know of any youngster who is a victim of this heinous crime. Contact your local social services department, which investigates reports of child abuse. If you believe a child is in imminent danger of death or great bodily harm, it's recommended that you notify the police immediately.

Posted on April 3, 2024. 

Dynamics of school bullying

Children who suffer school bullying should understand that although all young bullies are cruel troublemakers, they are actually cowards, because they are afraid to annoy anyone who is bigger and stronger than them. Similar to adults, when stressed, school bullies project their anger on others whom they consider to be weak.

The victims must not get upset, because that's exactly what these tormentors want; for their targets to react, show distress, and play their malicious game. Instead, the victims should ignore the bullies, avoid eye contact, speak to them only when it's absolutely necessary, and treat them as if they are of no consequence and shun them. Bullies are self-centered, crave attention and don't like to be ignored, so they lose interest in bothering people who neither pay attention to their antics, nor show any reaction. 

It's important to emphasize that bullies are ultra-sensitive, excitable, easily provoked and become violent if their targets taunt them in return. Don't argue with, or antagonize them. Since they are aggressive, stubborn and merciless, it's impossible to reason with them. They need to be avoided as much as possible. 

Teachers and the school administration should be notified about any abusive behavior. School bullying is illegal under both state and federal law.

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services maintains a website at stopbullying.gov.

Posted on Sept. 12, 2022.

Einstein knew atomic bomb would change everything

I’ve uncovered more details since Frank Shatz's column, “Williamsburg man looks to Einstein's FBI files, words for questions on atomic bomb” was published Dec. 22.

In researching Albert Einstein's role in trying to prevent the proliferation of nuclear weapons and a potential nuclear war, I learned that he and the physicist Leo Szilard created the Emergency Committee of Atomic Scientists in 1946. It gradually disbanded in 1950, but most of the members continued to campaign against nuclear war. 

A board member was the chemist Linus Pauling, who was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1962.

I discovered that President Franklin D. Roosevelt sent a second reply to Einstein in 1939. Later, Einstein sent a second letter to Roosevelt in 1940, and a third one in 1945. In his last letter, he pleaded that atomic weapons not be used against the Japanese. In July 1945, Szilard and 69 other Manhattan Project scientists signed and sent a petition to President Harry S. Truman, which was hidden from him. It also was a plea not to use the atomic bomb on Japan. The petition was declassified and made public in 1961. 

Einstein and the Manhattan Project scientists believed that atomic attacks against Japan would be unjustified. Their motive for developing an American atomic bomb was for defense; for the purpose of counterattack, in case Nazi Germany developed nuclear weapons and used them against the allied nations. Since the war in Europe ended in May 1945, there was no longer a justification for using those weapons. And American policymakers knew Japan didn’t have a nuclear program. 

Einstein’s viewpoint was that atomic weapons could be maintained as a deterrence, but should never be used. He thought Soviet-American politics may have been a factor in Truman's decision to destroy Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

In 1905, when Einstein wrote his famous formula E=mc2  in his Theory of Special Relativity, he believed that an atomic bomb would be so difficult to develop that it wouldn’t happen in his lifetime. The Manhattan Project was launched Dec. 6, 1941, the day before the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. 

The project commenced soon after the British government sent a secret report to Washington explaining that nuclear physicists in Britain discovered that an atomic bomb would be easier to develop than scientists had previously thought was possible. Einstein knew about the Manhattan Project, and was secretly kept informed about developments by several scientists who were his friends when they lived in Europe. 

In December 1944 he sensed that the project would be successful. This upset him. He realized that whether or not the bomb was used in the war, it would change the nature of both war and peace forever. Policymakers in Washington weren’t thinking about this aspect, and he thought they must be encouraged to do so before it was too late.

In his article “Einstein and the Bomb,” Walter Isaacson wrote, “Thus began the political mission that would dominate the remaining decade of Einstein’s life. Since his days as a teenager in Germany, he had been repulsed by nationalism, and he had long argued that the best way to prevent wars was to create a world organization that had the authority to resolve disputes and the military power to impose its resolutions. Now, with the impending advent of a weapon so awesome that it could transform both war and peace, Einstein viewed this approach as no longer an ideal but a necessity.”

On August 10, 1945, the day after Nagasaki was destroyed, officials in Washington released a long history that was compiled by Princeton physics professor Henry DeWolf Smyth, detailing the secret project to develop the atomic bomb. The report, much to Einstein’s annoyance, placed great historic weight for the launch of the project to the famous 1939 letter he had written to President Roosevelt. A few months before Einstein’s death, he told Linus Pauling, “Perhaps I can be forgiven, because we all felt that there was a high probability that the Germans were working on this problem and they might succeed and use the atomic bomb and become the master race.”

In a message Shatz sent me before writing his Einstein column, he stated: “I wonder whether you are aware of the connection between Albert Einstein and the Reves Center for International Studies at the College of William & Mary.” He continued, “Albert Einstein not just endorsed Emery Reves’ book, 'The Anatomy of Peace,' but considered it the answer to solving the threat of a nuclear war. A copy of the letter he has written to Emery Reves, is on display at the ornate Reves Room, at the Center.”

This commentary was published in The Virginia Gazette on May 11, 2022. In a note to me, Frank Shatz wrote: "I read with great interest your piece in today’s Virginia Gazette. It would provide a lot of people with information they haven’t been aware of. This is an important footnote to history!"