What Would You Do?

Source: PickPik

Author's Note: I read "The Divine Archer" by F.J. Gould which is just a creative retelling of the Ramayana. He didn't change much of anything from the original, but I was very interested in the part of the story where Hanuman goes to visit Sita. He shrinks himself down to a gnat! I thought this shapeshifting ability was so cool, but I didn't know how to incorporate it into an actual story so what I did instead was create a high school talk show featuring all of the characters you know and love. Your narrators are Ravana and Shurpanahka who attend Sri Lanka High and are going to discuss a question asked to the high schoolers about college student, Hanuman. As to the narration style, it doesn't matter which person you envision speaking which parts. You could even just imagine them both speaking at the same time or playing off from one another. I tried to make their responses as accurate to the characters as possible but a few of them did end up being quite silly. I really just had fun with it and wrote a silly piece so I hope you enjoy! Now, welcome to Ravana and Shurpanahka's talk show.

Podcast Station (Source: Needpix)

Ravana and Shurpanahka's "What Would You Do?"

Hello and welcome back to our daily talk show where we ask the question What Would You Do? As always, you're listening to this broadcast right here at Sri Lanka High with your hosts, the siblings, Ravana and Shurpanahka.

This week, we're delving into the minds of teenagers just like us. We gathered together fifty of you filthy animals and asked: "If you could shrink yourself to the size of a gnat like Hanuman from Rama Uni, what would you do?" Here are some of your responses!

Sugriva says, "Huh, I'd probably, like, fly into the girls' locker room or something, ha ha." Excellent response, Sugriva. We can tell it took you a while to think of that. Very imaginative, bud. Here's an idea, maybe you should stop skipping classes instead of trying to ogle every girl.

Sita says, "Ew, who would want to be a gnat? Can I choose to be something prettier?" Well, yes, Sita, you can. You could choose to not be superficial. Ha ha, just kidding, girl, we kid. You're so pretty ...

Dasharatha responded with, "If I was a gnat, I'd fly into a bug zapper." Yeesh, that's dark there, Dashy. You know, there's always counseling in room 222 if you need it. Someone make sure that guy doesn't have access to any bug zappers.

Lakshmana's response was, "I wouldn't want to be a gnat unless my brother could also be a gnat. Oh, and my girlfriend. And her friend, who's a girl. And my cat... and my girlfriend's cat. Okay, could everyone else just be a gnat with me?" Easy there, man. It was a hypothetical question. You can leave your cat at home for this one.

And of course we had to include a response from our inspiration for this question. Hanuman from Rama University responded with, "Well, as you guys know, I can shrink myself down to the size of a gnat. One of my favorite things to do when I'm the size of a gnat, though, is to spy on people. Fly on the wall, as they say. I hear lots of juicy gossip that way. I also get to know the people around me better so that I can take them down in an argument later if I need to." Yikes, that's kind of scary. Truly terrifying, actually. We're gonna ask that you leave now. Like, for real. See you later, but then again, probably not since apparently you're a spy.

Finally, the last response we'll have time for today and our personal favorite is from star quarterback, Rama, whose answer was, "Why would I be a gnat when I can be a god?" Excuse us while we contain our laughter. Is this guy serious? He's too much. Here's a question for you, Rama. Why be a god when you could just be a good guy? Answer that one for us next time.

Anyways, catch you later on "What Would You Do?" As always, we are wishing you hell. Ravana and Shurpanahka signing off. Bye!

Gnat on the Wall (Source: Pixabay)

Bibliography: The Divine Archer by F.J. Gould. Website: Internet Archive .