Patients-not just Images
Devoted to Education and Practice in Patient-centered Radiology
Chairman's Corner
Chairman's Corner
Sorry? - no way!
Sorry? - no way!
Ravi Ramakantan
Ravi Ramakantan
It’s a mad world out there.
It’s a mad world out there.
There are cat-fights and dog-fights.
There are cat-fights and dog-fights.
The only difference is that animal fights do not involve ego. And hence they can settle without much backlash.
The only difference is that animal fights do not involve ego. And hence they can settle without much backlash.
Not so easy with humans; not- especially if you a 25 something resident in KEM!!
Not so easy with humans; not- especially if you a 25 something resident in KEM!!
Resident warfare is nothing new – not to us in Radiology anyway, where we have had to interact with virtually every other department in the hospital.
Resident warfare is nothing new – not to us in Radiology anyway, where we have had to interact with virtually every other department in the hospital.
In my times as resident, it was not warfare – just fights – simply because all residents were GSites, we were mostly from the same batch – most were friends. Even after a heated argument, most times, we were friends again. Not so today. There are major cultural and “ethnic” differences amongst residents, language barriers exist and misunderstanding of what is said, heard and meant is rampant.
In my times as resident, it was not warfare – just fights – simply because all residents were GSites, we were mostly from the same batch – most were friends. Even after a heated argument, most times, we were friends again. Not so today. There are major cultural and “ethnic” differences amongst residents, language barriers exist and misunderstanding of what is said, heard and meant is rampant.
So, we no longer have fights – just plain, simple warfare.
So, we no longer have fights – just plain, simple warfare.
There are many variations and uncertainties about these resident warfares – the only certain thing is that they will occur with alarming regularity.
There are many variations and uncertainties about these resident warfares – the only certain thing is that they will occur with alarming regularity.
It all started with a couple of phone calls (not one, but two) at my home on a Sunday afternoon - from a couple of residents from one of the superspeciality units complaining about the “rude and threatening” behaviour from a radiology resident. I listened politely to the outpouring on the phone and as is usual, I said, “We will sort it out tomorrow”.
It all started with a couple of phone calls (not one, but two) at my home on a Sunday afternoon - from a couple of residents from one of the superspeciality units complaining about the “rude and threatening” behaviour from a radiology resident. I listened politely to the outpouring on the phone and as is usual, I said, “We will sort it out tomorrow”.
Tomorrow came.
Tomorrow came.
I have learned from experience, not to open my mouth without listening to both sides… and as always happens, the versions from the radiology side and the “other” side were quite and significantly different – I got a distinct impression that some blatant lies were being let loose. All this is old hat for me, so I did not bother to counter or argue since I have always held that in matters such as these “The truth is always somewhere in between.”
I have learned from experience, not to open my mouth without listening to both sides… and as always happens, the versions from the radiology side and the “other” side were quite and significantly different – I got a distinct impression that some blatant lies were being let loose. All this is old hat for me, so I did not bother to counter or argue since I have always held that in matters such as these “The truth is always somewhere in between.”
And the exact truth is impossible to ascertain and in my opinion, no energy and time needs to be wasted on this.
And the exact truth is impossible to ascertain and in my opinion, no energy and time needs to be wasted on this.
As is my won’t, I gave philosophical a lecture to the residents from the other department (my own resident must have had enough of this just being in radiology) … I thought things would smoothen out and a couple of hours later, the five of us sat to round to put one more “L'affaire des residents” behind us.
As is my won’t, I gave philosophical a lecture to the residents from the other department (my own resident must have had enough of this just being in radiology) … I thought things would smoothen out and a couple of hours later, the five of us sat to round to put one more “L'affaire des residents” behind us.
The concerned department Chief, the two concerned residents from that department, the radiology resident and I sat across.
The concerned department Chief, the two concerned residents from that department, the radiology resident and I sat across.
“I do not want to go into details” , I started off to my resident – “What you said seems to have hurt them”. So I suggest you just say “Sorry” to them.
“I do not want to go into details” , I started off to my resident – “What you said seems to have hurt them”. So I suggest you just say “Sorry” to them.
The poor radiology resident had no option against my request, which must obviously have been seen as a command.
The poor radiology resident had no option against my request, which must obviously have been seen as a command.
“I am sorry, if I had hurt you” promptly blurted the radiology resident.. I felt great. The resident had lived up to my expectation and “ideals”.
“I am sorry, if I had hurt you” promptly blurted the radiology resident.. I felt great. The resident had lived up to my expectation and “ideals”.
“Now why don’t you say sorry” said the other department chief to his residents.
“Now why don’t you say sorry” said the other department chief to his residents.
A few tense, silent moments passed and out came the shocker.
A few tense, silent moments passed and out came the shocker.
“We do not think we have done anything that we should say sorry for” was the startling response from them
“We do not think we have done anything that we should say sorry for” was the startling response from them
I was aghast - taken aback- as this was what I had least expected.. From their demeanor, it was clear that there was defiance and no remorse. I saw no point in pushing the matter further.
I was aghast - taken aback- as this was what I had least expected.. From their demeanor, it was clear that there was defiance and no remorse. I saw no point in pushing the matter further.
I politely thanked my contemporary and along with my resident left the room.
I politely thanked my contemporary and along with my resident left the room.
On the way down, I could hear sobs from my resident. That too didn’t shock me – it always ends in sobs and tears.
On the way down, I could hear sobs from my resident. That too didn’t shock me – it always ends in sobs and tears.
“I do not want you to feel bad about having to say an unilateral sorry; I said to my resident who was walking along, “In fact, I am proud that my resident has the courage and sensitivity to behave in a civilized manner. That they did not want to say sorry is their problem, it in no way reflects on you.”
“I do not want you to feel bad about having to say an unilateral sorry; I said to my resident who was walking along, “In fact, I am proud that my resident has the courage and sensitivity to behave in a civilized manner. That they did not want to say sorry is their problem, it in no way reflects on you.”
With that I left the resident to personal thought and sobs.
With that I left the resident to personal thought and sobs.
On my way home for lunch, it was obvious to me, that the other residents had missed the point of the whole exercise. It was not a matter of who was right or wrong but one of putting things behind with one of the three most important words in English language “Sorry” ( “Thank you” and “Please” being the other two). I was not angry with those residents - not in the least; I felt sorry for them.
On my way home for lunch, it was obvious to me, that the other residents had missed the point of the whole exercise. It was not a matter of who was right or wrong but one of putting things behind with one of the three most important words in English language “Sorry” ( “Thank you” and “Please” being the other two). I was not angry with those residents - not in the least; I felt sorry for them.
For, some day when they are older and lived through the travails of life, seen ups and downs over which they have no apparent control, have their own 25 year old kids, they will realize how important it is to learn to get along with others, not to let minor issues hurt yourself or that the Newton’s third law is about “mechanics” not human relationships
For, some day when they are older and lived through the travails of life, seen ups and downs over which they have no apparent control, have their own 25 year old kids, they will realize how important it is to learn to get along with others, not to let minor issues hurt yourself or that the Newton’s third law is about “mechanics” not human relationships
When dogs bark; you do not bark right back – just walk along and away from them.
When dogs bark; you do not bark right back – just walk along and away from them.
It is never too late to learn.
It is never too late to learn.
July 2007
July 2007