Courage And conviction

In response to my article about lessons in humanity from school board race and to the election itself, some have displayed the toxic tribalism the article describes. The lessons from the school board race offer a way of responding. 

Comments to the article posted on social media reflected one mark of tribalism: dehumanizing those with differing views. The article describes the love that Justice Ginsburg and Justice Scalia had for one another – a love grounded in the hundreds of hours Ginsburg spent with Scalia, whom she called her best buddy. They were a model of humanity. And yet, some commenters reject that model, insisting the justices were wrong to love one another – that Scalia’s legal opinions should have disqualified it. Tribe over humanity. 

Another mark has been the way some have spiked the football in victory, confirming that their aim in politics – perhaps in life? – is to defeat the enemy tribe. Though the race was about schools, celebrations reveal the victors’ real objective: relishing the suffering of their enemy. One email to Meg Bryce said: “You lost. Your Dad is in hell.” Other post-result messages have likewise mocked her for “losing,” being a “bigot,” and her father being “a dead whacko.” As a Bryce supporter, I have received similar attempts to rub it in, like a direct message after the results from one commenter (a “journalist”?) that said only: “LMAO.” 

What he and others fail to realize about people like myself and Bryce is that our team did not lose. We do not have a team. Since our identities are not defined by politics, we do not share the view that the object of a school board race is for one tribe to beat another. This is not sport to us. My own interest in the race was reversing the freefall of county schools for children, two of whom are my own. Given how many other outlets there are for tribal warfare, I hoped that tribalists might spare a race about children from it. But, alas, they bring their warfare everywhere, and then “celebrate” in kind.    

Here’s the thing, though: my article was not intended for them. Their addiction to tribalism is rooted in forces too powerful for any single article to reverse. It may be loneliness, self-hatred, collapse of society’s institutions that give life purpose, or some other cause that leads them to fill a void of meaning in their lives with tribalism.  

My article was for the rest of us: people who, in a polarized world, are still trying to be grown-ups. People who see the humanity in everyone, not just those who share our views. 

Bryce showed us a path forward. While tribalists will continue to try to inject poison into every aspect of life, the rest of us can refuse. When tribalists shoot poisoned darts at us, they want us to shoot back. They want the fight. That’s the dopamine rush they seek. We can choose not to give it to them. We can choose not to spread toxicity. 

But, as Bryce showed us, refusing to shoot back does not mean being silent. Like Bryce, we can keep speaking our minds with conviction and respect. They may mock us. They may threaten us. But, they cannot silence us. And, they cannot stop us from continuing to see the humanity in everyone, no matter their political views.   

On social media, usually it’s easy to spot someone who seeks tribal warfare rather than good faith discussion. If there’s ever a doubt, though, engaging respectfully will expose them. They will reveal themselves quickly by trying to provoke a fight with ad hominem attacks. At that point, you can just wish them the best.

Simon Davidson
November 10, 2023