Chapter 14 - Payback Time

Liao Yucheng had moved in at the end of May, and now it was mid-July—the hottest time of the year. He'd somehow acquired several potted plants and put them on the balcony, adding some life and vibrancy to the apartment.

One evening he was watering the plants when He Bing walked over with two cold beers from the fridge, handing one to Liao Yucheng. Liao Yucheng took a big gulp, feeling incredibly pleased. Seeing He Bing looking downcast, he asked cheerfully, "He Bing, have you been dealing with something stressful lately? You seem kind of down."

He Bing held his beer can with both hands, head lowered, looking rather pitiful. "It's nothing. Just work stress."

Liao Yucheng played with a tender new leaf on one of the plants, sounding casual. "I don't know if anyone's told you this before, but you're really terrible at lying. Every time you try, you give yourself away before anyone can even call you out on it."

He Bing's hands were getting wet from the condensation on the can. He wiped them on his pants, looking uncomfortable. "It's not that obvious, is it."

Liao Yucheng turned with a smile. "So what's really going on? Can't even tell me?"

Liao Yucheng's smile was mesmerizing, impossible to refuse. He Bing hesitated, then finally said, "I... fell for someone."

Liao Yucheng looked interested. "Oh, that's good news."

He Bing continued, "But they already like someone else."

"Ah." Liao Yucheng showed the right amount of sympathy. "So you're dealing with that too."

"Yeah." He Bing sat down on a stool on the balcony, looking dejected. "Secretly crushing on someone is really not easy."

Liao Yucheng held back a laugh. A secret crush was supposed to be something discreet, but this guy had "I like you" practically written across his forehead—was it even fair to call it a secret? However, Liao Yucheng maintained his composure, his tone almost sighing as he said, "Yeah, I understand that feeling better than anyone." 

He Bing, already hurting over his feelings, felt like he'd been stabbed again hearing that. When He Bing went quiet, Liao Yucheng asked, "How long have you liked this person?"

He Bing thought about it. "Not that long. About a month."

"A month." Liao Yucheng leaned back against the wall. "That really is pretty short."

He Bing's head drooped. "But even just this one month has been torture."

Liao Yucheng laughed softly, looking up at the moon. "I've been secretly in love with someone for so many years, I can't even remember what it felt like after just one month." Seeing He Bing stay silent, he continued, "When I first realized I'd fallen for him, even I was shocked. I was scared he'd figure it out, so I could only watch him from a distance—not too close, not too far."

He Bing wallowed in his misery. "What happened then?"

"Then he got a girlfriend. The night I found out, I got completely wasted. For a while I was really depressed, my temper was horrible, and I couldn't sleep at night. One day I'd think I should be happy for them, the next I'd viciously wish they'd break up. I thought I was losing my mind." Liao Yucheng pointed at his head with a smile. "This thing was close to malfunctioning."

Hearing Liao Yucheng recount these painful memories so casually felt like tiny needles pricking He Bing's heart. "That idiot doesn't deserve you suffering like that."

Liao Yucheng disagreed. "He does. As long as I think he's worth it, that's enough. I used to resent him too, but besides these secret feelings, I never actually did anything for him. And those feelings weren't what he needed. Loving someone deeply isn't grounds to demand reciprocation."

He Bing didn't know how many sleepless nights of unrequited love it took to reach that kind of acceptance. He turned his face away, voice trembling slightly. "I don't understand that kind of reasoning."

Liao Yucheng smiled. "That's good. I hope you never have to understand it."

Liao Yucheng looked up at the moon with a faint smile, like he was gazing at someone who didn't belong to him. But He Bing just wanted to cover his eyes and lock him in his arms. He finally couldn't help urging, "Yucheng, forget about him."

Liao Yucheng turned to face him, enunciating each word clearly. "I can't do that." He took a drink of beer. "I've tried countless times, but loving him has become a habit. You can't just stop a habit."

He Bing insisted, "But habits can be changed!"

"I don't want to change." When he said this, Liao Yucheng's eyes shone brilliantly. That determined look contained not just endless devotion, but also a kind of happiness born from satisfaction and no regrets.

That look stung He Bing's eyes. He finally lowered his gaze, understanding his complete defeat.

He gripped his fingers so hard the can in his hand deformed with a crunch. He forced a laugh. "Why talk about these depressing things? Come on, let's drink." He went back inside and brought out every beer from the fridge. "We've known each other so many years and never really drank together properly. Let's drink more tonight."

He Bing downed can after can. Liao Yucheng didn't stop him. Only when He Bing was completely wasted and about to pass out did Liao Yucheng help him into bed.

Despite the alcohol, He Bing didn't sleep peacefully. He kept mumbling nonsense and called Liao Yucheng's name several times.

Liao Yucheng lay beside him watching, thinking it wouldn't be bad to take advantage of his drunkenness for some drunken misbehavior—just go straight to home base and skip waiting forever for He Bing's confession. Liao Yucheng reached down and gave He Bing's soft package a squeeze, clicking his tongue. Can't even get hard.

Liao Yucheng had witnessed all of He Bing's heartbreak tonight. While He Bing slept, Liao Yucheng straddled him and mimed slapping him repeatedly from both sides. Though his palms never actually touched He Bing's face, the fierce motions made it look like you could hear the slaps landing.

After a dozen or so phantom slaps, Liao Yucheng finally felt satisfied and stopped. After all, he'd been suffering over He Bing for over ten years—He Bing had only been like this for a month, so the pain he'd experienced was barely a fraction of what Liao Yucheng had endured. What goes around comes around, and now it was finally Liao Yucheng's turn to exploit He Bing's weakness. If he didn't take full advantage of this, he'd feel cheated.

Liao Yucheng stared at He Bing's sleeping face. Suddenly he heard him call his name again. Liao Yucheng's heart melted. With a tender smile, he gently lowered his head and kissed him.