The End

My eyes teared as I welcomed my tired husbands back. Prince Uttara died the first day. Uttaraa and Subhadra wept his death and I feared for the same destiny in the future. War for Kshatryia women was also a way of life. We spend nights tending to the men’s wounds. As days passed, I could no longer pretend to smile. Death surrounded all of us. A tragic, bloody war put family against family. Brothers, nephews, cousins, uncles all killing each other left and right. My mornings filled with terror waiting for the safe return of my family and my nights filled with heartbreak as I watched them trudge home exhausted or injured.

On the tenth day Uncle Bheeshma died by Arjuna’s sword. On the thirteenth day, against war rules, six Kauravas including Dronacharya and Karna surrounded sixteen-year-old Abhimanyu. He did his best to fight them off his but was killed in the end. Subhadra and Uttaraa wept his death all night long. Another widow, another mother without her son. I had desired this battle for so long to avenge insults made on my honor but the men I hate are not the only ones dying but also the men I love. Had I made a huge mistake for pushing my husbands into war or was I just following my destiny? So many questions clouded my mind.

Arjuna went on to avenge his son’s death. He beheaded Jayadratha for holding up the Pandava amry from helping Abhimanyu. Just like that another woman, Dushala lost a husband.

On the 15^th day, Krishna and Yudhishthria planned to make Drona believe his son had been killed. The told him Ashwattahama had died and like Krishna predicted Drona became weak from the news. As he meditated my brother, Dhrishtadyumna took his chance. With a swift sword movement, he decapitated Drona. You may think he committed a sinful act but like me he no choice but to fulfilling his fate, he was born from fire to kill Drona and so he did. Ashwatthama sore revenge when he heard the news. After Drona’s death, advantage was on the Pandavas. They chose this time to fulfill their oaths taken in the kuru court.

Bheema killed Dushasana-the man that attempted to disrobe me. In a golden goblet he brought his blood to me. While I was still battling my emotions, I bathe with his blood and I braided my hair for the first time since thirteen years. But as I looked in the mirror, queen Gandhari came to my mind. She must be suffering to the news of her son’s death. Why must my revenge bring women so much suffering.

Arjuna and Karna dueled fiercely in the end Arjuna won. Later he became devasted to learn he had killed his half-brother. Karna was queen Kunti and sun god Surya’s son.

Nakula killed Uluka son of Shakuni and Sahedeva never forgetting that Shakuni had hatched the plan to use dice against him and his brothers avenged the years they spent in exile and killed him. Bheema dueled with Duryodhana and just like he said in his oath he broke Duryodhana’s thigh and avenged the insult to my person. With his death the Kaurava army disbanded. Mahabharata war lasted eighteen days, the Pandavas became victorious. My heart felt a little better knowing it was over, but it still hurt seeing all the death around me.

It was too early to celebrate victory for that night Ashwatthama entered Dhrishtadyumna’s tent and killed him as he slept. That morning, before my eyes laid what I always feared, my brother dead. He was quickly brought to me, for me to decide his punishment. I wanted death to be his fate but as I looked into his eyes, I quickly changed my mind. I could not have other women suffer because of this war. I know to well the grief that comes with the lose of a son. I forgave him. In that moment I realized death and destruction were futile and revenge solved no problems—my inner battle had ended.

We performed rituals in the Ganga holy river for all those who died in war. I offered my prayers to my sons, brother, and all the women who lost someone and suffered to the war. My heart aches for the loss of life but evil has left and for that I am thankful.

Yudhishthira and I were crowned emperor and empress. The Pandavas and I, rebuilt the disastrous the war had caused and cared for all who had their men in the war. In the thirthy-six year of our reign, horrible news came. Krishna had died. My world was shattered at the lost of my best friend and savior. After that we decided to leave everything and proceed on the mahaprashthana- the final journey. It involved walking barefoot north to the sacred Himalayas without stopping or turning back a worthy way to die that only the most righteous could achieve.

So here we are back to the beginning of my story. After miles of walking in the cold snowy mountains by body began to grow numb. I fell into the snow knowing my end was near. My live was full of ups and downs, I thought my husbands did not love me much but in their own way the did and protected me until the end. I thank the gods for the fulfilment of my life’s purpose and let out my last breath. Brilliant light shines through me. I am ageless once again.

Authors note: Draupadi, is a complex character. She can come off as someone who only thinks about herself and I think at some point she does but that is also because of the life events she has gone through. During the war we see her having her own inner battle. As Krishna had told her, her battle was to get rid of the bitterness that she held in her heart. In the end she saw that revenge did not feel as good as she thought and forgave her brothers killers as that would bring more suffering. In the introduction I describe her as a fighter for women, which he continues to do throughout her whole story. The reason why she decided to forgive and why she felt bad about starting the war was because she was thinking about all the women who had to suffer because of it.