Civic Engagement

A dual pronged effort should be aimed 1) at state legislative seats in the most strategically important states, and 2) at low hanging tainted fruit or poorly commanded vessels elsewhere. It would be wise to take care to avoid any unfavorable unanticipated outcomes, as famously happened to Ralph Nader in 2000, taking much of the blame even though Gore failed to win his home state of Tennessee. In other words, don’t get the worst candidate elected by running, and get people mad at pirates at the same time. This is where consensus, self-selection and restraint come in, not muddying the waters or going into overly unfriendly places, focusing collective efforts minds and resources.

I thought to suggest just getting the low hanging fruit quickly and quietly and not disturbing anything else until next time. I personally am the type to at least take a poke at an almost out of reach perfect peach and see what happens. Maybe just give the whole tree a shake if strong enough, extra-well prepared in case more than anticipated come down. Imagine a smooth functioning crew of 20 suddenly taking on two new ships and 100 unfamiliar opportunistic pirates, or lots of wasted fruit left on the ground as you peachlessly sprint for the beach, pursued by an angry orchard keeper and allies. Extremely unfortunate when it happens, better not to have tried at all.

On the other hand, not depending in any measure where you are, if you wait too long, eventually everything will be gone, probably eaten by ravens or washed away in a flood. Although they usually prefer donuts, ravens are voracious and will eat just about anything. Live or dead, fresh or fried, frosted or fuzzy - you name it.

There are too many legislative seats to defend, given that many representatives are nearly unknown to their constituents. They are most familiar to SoCalGas or Monsanto, Chevron, Dominion Energy or the local equivalent powerhouse. Some of these people are quite influential. Their seats, in pirate terms, perhaps the equivalent to command of a river patrol boat, certainly not a warship, definitely not Coast Guard. These riverine guardians would rather (& frequently do) work on their suntans, but they are well-trained nevertheless.

It is wrong to launch too many negative characterizations at once. There are many well-intentioned and capable politicians of all stripes in office. They have just one thing in common beyond being patriotic Americans: they are all overly beholden to party leadership.

I should emphasize that there are rivers aplenty, sails optional where current is right. Not the same as the ocean, and I think it is fortunate for everybody that the U.S. Army looks after most of the infrastructure. Wherever you are, just make the best of the situation.

We have seen many times, on both sides, heroes, truth tellers, and voices of conscience will be few and far between when the big shots issue the call to close ranks around even the most dubious schemes. When crunch time comes, they will form up like so many would- be ships of the line. They might unexpectedly break up into three or possibly even four uneven files, given the existing tensions over the direction of both parties, adding to the uncertainty. Fortunately such chaos is not outside the realm of maritime or other earthly history, and there are likely to be broadly predictable consequences if courses diverge.

If anybody knows anything anymore about monarchs and how most of them have run things, they might also know something about absent admirals and oversleeping captains and grumpy crews. This information would be very helpful in figuring out how to approach everything from rowboats and river patrols, to orchards and orchard keepers, of which there are few. Because, my friends, there is a very similar situation with Democrat and Republican leadership and the people who answer to them.

It would be wisest to run these campaigns on a write-in basis, where legal, carefully by the rules. I prefer to be more under the radar, rather than drawing fire. Some like more to mix it up. Certainly one would not want to be invisible, that does not usually draw votes.

The element of surprise has always been useful to pirates, difficult though not impossible to accomplish in political organising and campaigning, the more time to prepare in advance the better, not without risks. The line between surprises and dirty tricks in politics is most important on defense, especially in our judgmental and hypocritical age.

Ballot access AKA BALLAST is difficult, expensive, labor intensive, and likely to grow more so. Conventional wisdom holds that in most places political outsiders would be unlikely to make inroads without it. Especially when surprise is not an option, pirates might rather peacock or adopt some dramatic measure in an attempt to dissuade their quarry from putting up a fight, at least to unnerve them, or to distract them from another pirate. When resources are extremely scarce, “Bluff in the Buff” (not literally) may create a diversion or entice the opponent into devoting efforts where they are wasted. Rarely attempted in colder climates, but few have no resources at all.

Early adopting candidates might have to self-nominate and self-select, working together if there are more than one in a district. Sometimes pirates just flip a coin and get behind the result.

Candidates would be advised to have a track record on some of the issues involved, especially local ones. It is theoretically possible there are many local issues languishing, unaddressed due to the partisan divide further up the line. Creative and carefully considered proposals and compromises might get a person moving. Stay out of the high winds unless fully capable of handling them when they come up. Pirates have issues with big winds, and experience worrying about them, if nothing else. A few policy suggestions too. See the Plank. It is important to be able to convincingly explain why these issues are critical, not just list them.

Squeaky clean, but not over-groomed candidates are preferred, the electorate hopefully having had its fill of narcissists. In other words, good looks and expen$ive teeth should not be a requirement, or to which anybody needs pay attention.

Historically, pirates have filthy reputations, appearance, and hygiene, all difficult to restore after weathering, and resulting in terrible teeth. None of these characteristics at either extreme - aiming at excessively familiar public vanity - are likely to be helpful with potential allies .

Youthful candidates, given their capacity for organizing on campuses and technical savvy, might also step forward, though they are widely suspected of being disengaged and cynical, or completely out of their minds. The younger generation, Alas once more.

Imagine the scene: a steady income, and a title, working in a grand echoey building illuminated by a toothy smiles bright enough to remind one of the night time stars, should the lights go out. Drips from above or water rising from below are normally rare. Granite or marble floors insulate your feet from the dirt and the mud, the stone or concrete walls remote, the roof so high you are sure to strain your neck should you try to discern the details of the art. Although there is still a rare chance of getting wet, there is also none of sinking. Surely some will try.

To summarize, an effort to win some key state legislative seats would be an honorable and rewarding undertaking, even at two strikes on the last out, still down more than one run, especially for talented folks not relishing being benched at such an important time.

Fortunately we are not there yet, just recently set sail, for those who were taking a nap ashore or missed a call or two. Even bringing in 50 or 100 votes somewhere, first time, might be an informative dry run for the next, getting more people involved in the process, and another way of verifying that all the votes are being counted. I regret I do not have the expertise or data to indicate less vaguely what course to take. There are probably many dusty, bumpy roads ahead.