I did a lot of reflection on my experiences with running during this project, and learning about why other people run has made me reconsider what I thought I already knew about my experience running.
I am not accustomed to running with people every day. During the school year, I do not run with the 5C running club every day intentionally – I love running with people, but I find that I am the most at peace when I run alone. The project made me reconsider my reasons for running, mostly because having to talk with strangers every day was the most stressful part of my trip. What is usually the most relaxing part of my day quickly became my biggest point of stress, and I began to look forward to the days when I would run alone and interview runners I encountered along the running path because I felt like I could actually enjoy running again.
Similar to many people I encountered in the course of this project, I like running because it gives me the daily opportunity to be outside. Mostly, however, I like the consistency, discipline, goal setting, and challenges associated with running. Prior to running cross country my freshman year of high school, I had not been seriously challenged academically or athletically. The start of my running journey was the first time I was not good at something I cared about, and getting in shape and becoming a dedicated runner is the main reason I am able to overcome adversity in other points in my life. Even though I am not struggling to get in shape the same way I was at the beginning of high school, running still gives me the opportunity to challenge myself every day. This is likely why I enjoy speed workouts so much. Prior to this project, I thought long runs were my favorite type of run. Running is incredibly peaceful for me – I relish the consistent sound of my feet hitting the pavement, and running is the only time I can completely let go of everything I am worried about and do something for myself. For me, long runs are especially meditative, and I ignore the distance of my long run for the majority of the run and zone out completely. I was surprised, then, that I found myself looking forward to interval workouts on this trip, and planning speed workouts for when I get back to solo running. After some reflection, I realized that my appreciation for speed workouts makes sense: for me, one of the best parts of running is overcoming a challenge, and speed workouts have the biggest reward because they are the most mentally and physically demanding.
Another aspect of my love for speed workouts also probably has to do with how competitive I am. Ever since I began playing sports, my goal was always to win. Running enables me to express my competitive side, but rather than compete against others, I compete against myself. When I race now, there are usually thousands of people in a race, and I know that I will not come close to winning. Rather, running is a way for me to continually improve upon my previous self. Most importantly, running has made me a much kinder person. I have learned to motivate myself through positive self-talk, and I have become a kinder and more understanding person in the process.
While I realized some of these things before this project, I had not realized what I valued in terms of running until part of it was taken away from me. I am so glad that I was able to do this project and talk with other runners about why they run, and I learned that much of what I feel is similar to how others feel about running. What I did not realize is just how much I need to run alone sometimes. Running with people a few days a week is perfect for me, but running with other people daily during this experience meant the loss of the overwhelming sense of calm I get when I run, and I am thrilled that I am getting that back now.