The Earth, My butt, and other big, round things

“The Fat Girl Code of Conduct:

1. Any sexual activity is a secret. No public displays of affection.

2. Don’t discuss your weight with him.

3. Go further than skinny girls. If you can’t sell him on your body, you’d better overcompensate with sexual perks.

4. Never, ever, ever, ever, ever push the relationship thing. ”