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Written as part of a project for MLLL 4993
There once was an apple, Dave, who thought he was a red banana. He was born of the apple variety, but his parents, when Dave was nothing more than a small seed pod, were forced to put him up for adoption during what has been since dubbed the Pluot war - a destructive battle between the plum and apricot people. The war had taken its toll on the fruits and vegetables that dwelled in many parts of the produce section. He was raised within the safe haven of the Great Kiwi Republic by two loving red bananas imported directly from Central America. But, of course, Dave wasn't aware of his parentage. Instead, he simply considered himself to be an odd, spherical-shaped red banana
As Dave ripened, he grew close to a certain forgotten veteran of the Pluot war who also took refuge in the GKR: Carl, of the plum variety, was a hardened warrior and master of disguise. He could easily transform his appearance into that of any other food and fool even the sharpest of durians. The pair were closer than two peas in a pod. One morning, Dave, excited for the new day, searched far and wide for his best fruit Carl but he was nowhere to be found. Sadly, Carl, having lived to the ripe old age of expired, had been removed from the fruit basket he called home.
Dave had taken it hard. His heart felt like a bottomless cherry pit of despair. He couldn't handle the pealing of grief! He was on the brink of going absolutely bananas, nothing was holding him back now. But lo! The forbidden fruits of Carl's years of labor had come to fruition. Carl left to Dave in his will precisely three million dollars! Within Dave now was a badly mixed fruit smoothie of emotions. How could this be? Carl was a broke kiwi living off what nutritious stores he acquired since his own seedling days. He was more akin to a fruit plumb out of luck. Yet, here was proof that there was more to Carl than he ever knew. He couldn't help but wonder, what with Carl's adeptness at deception, if he grew tired of this kiwi-or-be-kiwied life and decided to turn over a new leaf.
Dave wandered the great halls of the kiwi kingdom. Filled with ancient stories of forgotten fruit and towering monuments of the great melon kings that came before, these halls gave Dave a sense of peace in an otherwise tumultuous time in his life. But then, no more than two minutes after Carl's demise, the distant sounds of shifting stems interrupted his thoughts. Dave turned around and found himself staring at an unlikely bunch: his parents.
Dave's parents rolled into his midst a fortune cookie, a token of the Chow Mein noodle-people. They themselves were given this wise cookie by a shady cantaloupe, who himself obtained such a delicacy directly from Carl. He cracked it open, and read the message of fortune contained within, but this was no normal aphorism. It was a warning - a warning of the danger that lurked in the deep parts of this fruity kingdom. But of course, that clever cantaloupe! How could Dave have missed it? The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, so they say. It was so audacious, even Dave had to take a second to appreciate the magnitude of what just came to him. It was no coincidence that Carl had disappeared the very night he was set to expire. It was a well crafted plan, reliant on the fact no fruit would shed a peel at the disappearance of an expired pear. Carl must have known he was in danger, and he has given him a fighting chance.
Dave knew what he had to do. He had a blind date with destiny tonight, and it certainly won't be easy peasy lemon squeezy. Dave has decided that he will flee into the great forest of the Brocc, rumored to be home to the chief flower known as Cauli, if he is to survive. He will leave his inheritance with his parents, so that they at least have something. As painful as the thought of leaving his parents behind is, it is something he must do, and the money should help his parents live on without him. After all, where he is going, he won't be needing the excessive quantity of veggie capital.
Author's Note:
I had a lot of fun writing this addition to my portfolio! Back in junior high, me and my best friends had this fun thing we did where we would each take turns writing new additions to a story similar to this one, staring fruity characters and bad puns. It started after I got bored and wrote what I thought at the time was a hilarious fruity short story after I finished a writing exam early. It got pretty ridiculous, but I tried to keep some of the same themes here too. Something that might be confusing to those of you reading is the weird swapping of Carl's fruit type. In case it is confusing, I want to point out he's able to take the form of any known food out there, so it's part of the running joke that every time his fruit type is explicitly mentioned in the story it will be different than the others.
Anyways, this story is my own adaptation of PDE Mahabharata: 21. The House of Fire by C. A. Kincaid. The basic idea of that story was that Prince Vidura foresaw an evil ploy of the prince Duryodhana to burn the Pandavas and Queen Kunti in a palace. Prince Vidura informs the Pandavas and Kunti of the coming attempt on their lives, and they then flee through a passageway into the forest. I took this general outline and applied a fruity flavor to it as best as I could! In this case, Dave is simultaneously the Pandavas and Queen Kunti, while Carl is Prince Vidura (who in my story happens to also pass... or did he?) and an unknown assailant is the evil Prince Duryodhana. Similarly, I adapted the forest to be the grand forest of the Brocc, home of the tall Broccoli trees, and Cauli the cauliflower who is supposed to be in reference to the chief Rakshasa the next couple of parts of the Mahabharata involve. I am thinking I might write my next portfolio story about a continuation of this one because these three chapters in the Mahabharata are rich with opportunity in my opinion. So, I left some wiggle room in this one in case I decided to do just that, so stay tuned I guess!
Bibliography:
"PDE Mahabharata: The House of Fire" by C. A. Kincaid. Web source.
Banner photo of the fruit section of a super market taken by Luis Tamayo on flikr.