Embedded Files
Frustration Infatuation
engrossed behind honeycomb walls of lust
and sticky mind-fucks
despite burning dry eyes, saliva spewing
behind teeth - all these crowded reminders of
simplicit humanity
it is never enough to satisfy the throat
indeedly raw and scraped dry from prose
of desperation and gross infatuation - or so
someone tells me so
someone I will never really know
my narrative voice is unreliable perchance
but I want to show her that this can be meant to be
she
she
she
she is water and wind
inspiration for deranged bargaining
someone unlike them but someone like me who seeks solaceafter a plea of billions - gleaming wealth for pieces of the soul
i have shattered on the kitchen tiles
funny the things your mind does when spewing from desperationone must scrub their skin with candied soap encrusted with diamonds and twelve hail marys
Why should lust be a sin?
the responsibility within the affection you give
may be safe but it is not living
I seek to bury a soul that is not whole
one whom has felt tremendous pain
do not tell me that I should pertain to a life lived otherwise
your god is not lustrous otherwise
one's people would not be so bored
15/11/2023
Love - a bruise
Have fallen so hard, your sheer presence has stained mepurple and blueflecks of gold through alchemybloodies wine infused souls
growing is roughyet we signify through etching tattoosat the end of the tunnel they'll watch memeeting you - catching a glance of something - a glow iridescent,my love I am stained golden
Enough scars are received in life to not choose some permanency of my own.
08/11/2023
wondering
desultory drive bya bay with a blue skyturning orange pinkpurple to greya man with his dog on the hill of the graveyarda veteran in his second life, he comes here to relive his firstsix feet under the sprouts
angel of entropyi watch as the waves silence under starsalongside the lives we soon will glance atand inevitably forget
23/09/2023
Australian Summer pt.1
The state of my hair makes me angry and agitatedNature scorches the sun embedded within my skinBoiling blood beneath puffy red cheeks - the UV reaching every part of me but my neckMy spine has clung to sweaty spiking sprouts - flourishing beginnings - a process to trustMaking me feel alive in the best and the worst ways.
03/01/2023
What do you notice?
My teacher told me to look through the world with the eyes of a poet/ and to see what i noticed if anything/ was different
i notice that my bed feels warmer in my childhood home
that when my sheets are changed i feel cleaner but more alone/ than when i am being watched / we should pay more surveillance to what is being overused and under lived in
i notice that i have a favourite tea - french earl greyand i notice that my mother knows how i take itshe knows more than i give her credit for/she noticed more than i gave her credit for/ maybe they tell the truth when they say mothers know us better than we do/ they remember parts of our lives that we didn't have the capacity to
i notice that it tastes sweeter as it cascades down my throat - and that's another thing I notice/ I notice how it moves/ how i move and that everything in me is a whirlpool
sometimes it's easy to forget how you exist and sometimes it's harder to remember
I notice that amber leaveshave very pronounced veinsand that they only crumblewhen they are crushed
17/03/2024
The evening following my first kiss
You kiss me in between the daysgoing by with a desire for some sanity it's too fleeting of a moment to remember the exact feelings
except for when you caught me with a dimly lit mirrorscrubbing my gums with blunt brisslesuntil my heartbeat is nothing but an echo in the roots of my teeth
grinning with glistening bloodstainedsatisfaction of knowing your taste for even a moment
12/04/2024
Visiting a Small Planet
There is space in my mind that you occupyspace I didn't know I hadHow do you get in there?Surely the passcode more secure then feathered hair and almond eyes?whoever did it last I don't remember when or why.
time on you is far from staticmemories whom were once my fondestintroduce themselves to you and discover a myriad of reasonsto ponder why rain fallshow the shape of you in my universeis warm and continuous, like whendrops form and run down the window in circles and sprintsshifting my mood and the rhythmic gallopsand you are a planet
27/03/2024
me and you
I grieve a girl too young to comprehend the worth of her age.
I don't know the new version of you, I don't think I want to. I know she is not someone who has known me.
19/06/2023
hurt / haunting
dried pieces of DNA, fleshand blood left to rotunder my fingernails is a docile heartbeat carvedit was all for your protectionmy dearest darling
sprayed on the walls but I swear t'was unintentionalthat won't change it - I can't have yoube here to watch me fall beneath my grave, nothing willstay sane if you stay
watch dry-eyed as I send you away full of warmth andbloodied in heated decaydeath has been dying for your weeksfeeling weak - conceptualisedby fractions of sleep
haunted with comfort
16/08/2023
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