The Importance of Right Beginning

   It seems to me insufficiently appreciated how tremendously important is right beginning, that is our initial attitude, in anything we undertake.  Whether it be the creation of a work of art or an inquiry into what is true and what is false–in either case the outcome stands or falls with the state of mind in which we approach the task in hand.

      The problem of right beginning can only be solved when we have understood the relationship between creative being, and its expression.  As long as there is even one thought, an intention to create–which presupposes a motive–the ensuing expression cannot emanate from the void, which is the true source of creativity; and thus there cannot be a right beginning. Unfortunately, at present, most creative effort in the world comes from such an intention, the artist's motive being “recognition” (consciously or unconsciously); and his activity is, therefore ultimately the outcome of frustration. In the past stages of mankind's history, this was not always the case to the same extent. For example, the great cathedrals of the Middle Ages were built and decorated by anonymous architects, and craftsmen. A good many of the inspired writings of the ancient Vedas and Upanishads were anonymously composed.

     On the other hand, when there is true creativity, there is not even one thought for each expression, that is, it may, or may not be expressed, but this has now become totally unimportant, and just because of its total unimportance, the expression can be purely spontaneous. The activity, then springs from a non-beginning and can therefore be called “right beginning”; in this case, it would perhaps be more articulate, speak of an “expression” than of an “expression” of creativity. To readers of this book the all-important question will probably be, “What is right beginning in the spiritual quest?  Here, unfortunately, most of us rush in where angels fear to tread.  For example, when someone claims to be seeking for God, is that right beginning, is that even being serious?  If he is seeking God he must first know that God exists, otherwise search becomes just meaningless.  Furthermore, in order to find God he must also know who or what God is; how otherwise would he recognize God and be certain that what he has found is truly God?

Space Of true and false values cannot be learned from Another; it cannot be mastered through the acquisition of information, which is adding to one store of knowledge, and therefore the cultivation of memory, it comes into being the moment that’s a thought, because aware of its own conditioning, and thus of its incapability of ever freed itself. After all to find out there, if there is the eternal. To readers of this book the all-important question will probably be, “What is right beginning in the spiritual quest?”  Here, unfortunately, most of us rush in where angels fear to tread.  For example, when someone claims to be seeking for God, is that the right beginning, is that even being serious?  If he is seeking God he must first know that God exists, otherwise search becomes just as meaningless.  Furthermore, in order to find God he must also know who or  what God is; how otherwise would he recognize God and be certain that what he has found is truly God?

You see, the trouble is that it is easy enough to invent words, but the words themselves have no inherent meaning.  The truth is, of course, that we do not know God-all we know is the word, the concept, and with that we are satisfied, in that we find a refuge.

For most of us there rarely is a moment of true beginning, for whatever we do is a continuation of the old, a reaction from thought, which is memory.  When we set out to meditate it is because we have heard or read about it–the necessity to cleanse the mind, how to practice, and so on.  But what we do is repetition, not independent inquiry, and has therefore little value.

True meditation takes place when man deeply looks into himself simply because he has woken up–and not from any compulsion, idea of social responsibility, or according to a certain blueprint laid down by others.  Thus, the mind itself, whose inherent nature it is to act from a motive, to be guided by collective consciousness, can never initiate mediation.   There is meditation only when the mind has come to an end, has died to all it knows, believes and hopes for.  It dies when it has completely given up all its self-centered activities, and this can only be when it sees their futility, their voidness.  So what is essential to us is right ending–without which there can be no right beginning.  

There is right ending, and so the beginning of meditation, only when what happens proceeds from the Void, when it occurs in spite of oneself, in spite of the mind’s machinations.  That is why a moment’s real meditation is like a miracle; it is truly a moment of illumination for it throws a clear light on all the false movements of the mind that keep us forever in the dark.

For most people creativity is inextricably associated with expression, the one not being possible but for the other.  They think that creative energy only comes about in the process of writing poetry, music, painting, dancing, and so on.  Yet it is our contention that there exists a kind of primordial creative energy, which is totally  divorced and independent of these activities, although they may flow from it.  It is this energy which affects the whole person and not a mere fragment, and has no connection with mental or artistic capacity and knowledge, although it may use these.  On a deeper level, we may say it is Creation uncontaminated by thought.

However, not only are creativity and expression one in the public mind; but, in its view, what matters most is the result, the expression, which may be “beautiful”, “useful” or “fashionable”, and so on in a materialistic world some can be put on it.  Thus we can see that the climate of collective thought has given undue emphasis to the value of expression.  And obviously, if we regard expression as more important than Being, we are still caught up in the play of the World; for why should we express the inner at all unless to fulfill ourselves in the outer? At the same time, have we perhaps not noticed that as the creative tide in us rises the urge to fulfill ebbs away?  If in this state there is an expression, it is completely spontaneous, without a single thought to impress.  The true artist therefore has no public; he works for the sheer joy of it.  

This then means the introduction of an element of casualness, a certain playfulness, into the creative process, barring which, what passes as creativity is not at all of the order of Creation.  As soon as the activity becomes “serious business”, that is, the result of “effort”, the source of the creative effort becomes suspect.  In fact, the words “creative effort”, however commonly used without being given a second thought, are really deeply contradictory.

This applies particularly to meditation, for in its pure form meditation represents the creative process par excellence; and without the element of playfulness there can be no true meditation.  It is because of this condition that the “I” can never meditate, for however superficial, frivolous and scatterbrained in its manifestation, in the core of its being and secret intent it is always deadly serious.  Because it is always scheming, calculating, end-gaming, it can never be relaxed and fully Live.

The miracle of meditation as true creativity is that it is experienced as the ending of one thing and the beginning of another.  The “other” is the purest substance of Play, and moreover a play which has no shadows because it is all-illuminating, being beyond the movement of the opposites.  All this and much more is involved when Krishnamurti talks about what it means “to be serious”, showing us incidentally that unless we pierce through the words we shall be bogged down in their contradictions.  

How many of us can truly say we are serious in Krishnamurti’s sense?

The lack of clarity in certain circles regarding the problem of right beginning is no more clearly illustrated than by the confused thought about meditation as “mind discipline”.  There are those who favor this as a proper path towards enlightenment; and others who oppose it on the grounds that deliberate spiritual training only constitutes “manipulation of the ego” and not its transcendence.  However, it may be asked, “Who is it that manipulates the ego?”  The above quoted statement appears still based upon the false notion of duality, for are not the manipulator and the manipulated one?  Spiritual training, either deliberate or undeliberate, can thus only be meaningless action, and not more relevant in this connection than, for example, going to the pictures.  But before the false notion of spiritual training drops from us, it must be clearly seen that it is just another escapist activity.

“Training” always entails looking into the future, does it not?  It implies that in time the desired result may be achieved, by continuous patient effort. We shall be happy, not today, but next month, next year, or next life, if we perform the prescribed exercises regularly and assiduously.  So by fixing my goal in the future, by keeping my eyes fixed on the ideal, which does not exist, I avoid looking at the actual, which is what I am at the moment.

Now if there is completely clear perception of what exists in the present, do I then still need to “train” myself?  If I have seen without distortion, that I am ambitious, greedy, envious, do I then still want to get rid of these properties, gradually, that is bit by bit over a period of time?  Or, having seen myself as I really am, is there not a purgation all at once?

So it is necessary to have this attention to deal with the here and now; and the looking at the future, at the ideal to be gained in due time, distracts from the perception of what is now.  Thus any pre-meditation to do something, any plan to further one’s ends, which has a psychological motivation, can never be right beginning.  Have we not noticed how the most significant events in our lives have always taken place unexpectedly?  There is right beginning only in the total absence of any thought of beginning, any commitment to a certain course of action or way of life.  It is the empty mind, the mind that has completely let go of all ideas about achieving goals, which dies continually to every experience, that is in a state of complete Attention to what is.  Therefore, to such a mind, which is all the time living under the shadow of Death, everything is new, fresh, and so every moment is a true beginning.  

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