Marriage is a significant part of a believer's life. We want every marriage represented in our group to thrive. Sadly, most of the group will be closer to surviving than thriving. As much as 80% will be in this category. You may also have a marriage that is in crisis mode. You will have to deal with this issue if you have struggling couples. If it is one person in your group, you can do some things with them outside of the group to help them, but if a majority of your group is struggling, then you might consider spending some group time to help them get back on track.

Most churches have free resources, groups, or counseling that can help. Get Strong has some mentor couples that may be able to help as well. Don't be afraid to say you don't know all the answers. Please take advantage of these free resources to help your group members during a difficult time. 

The marriage date night is one of the most talked about assignments. Make sure you go through the detailed instructions. Encourage the group to make a big deal about this exercise. Remind them not to retaliate or try to justify their actions. Let them share their feelings. The goal is to honor our spouse and be the best husband or wife we can be.

Extra Credit: The following scripture is great to memorize or study a little deeper.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 CSB

Love is patient, love is kind. Love does not envy, is not boastful, is not arrogant, [5] is not rude, is not self-seeking, is not irritable, and does not keep a record of wrongs. [6] Love finds no joy in unrighteousness but rejoices in the truth. [7] It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. [8] Love never ends…. 

Leader Guide 

• The questions are for your group to hear from their spouses. Not the other way around. Some spouses will want to respond by having you fill out the questions, but this assignment is primarily to find out how we can be better spouses. It can seem self-serving if you lead with both spouses filling out the forms. For example - they may think you want to do this assignment because you have things you want to fix in your spouse. If you focus on yourself, it will always seem more genuine.

• Date Night – I always start with discussing the assignment, or the details will start leaking out during other discussions. IMPORTANT - Identify someone who will be the most open and candid about sharing to go first. If the first person holds back, everyone else will do the same. 

• Ask lots of follow-up questions.

  • • What was their response to the "Date Night?"

    • What was your biggest takeaway?

    • Did you retaliate or try to justify yourself in any way?

    • How many items did they select?

    • Have them share the results of the questions.

• This assignment will yield several things we can work on. Use this as an opportunity to hold each other accountable. Each month we should be adding to this list as we strive to be the man or woman God has created us to be.

• Download handouts and send to your group.  (see below).

Get Strong Bible Reading Plan – Talking Points 

• Discuss the amazing scene in Isaiah 6. What would be your response? Would you say, "here I am, send me?"

• Discuss the importance of the new covenant in Jeremiah 31.

• Daniel lived in a foreign land and remained faithful to God. How does this apply to Christians living in a sinful world?

• Jonah was sent to help a nation he hated. We are called to love everyone. What people or groups do we need to show more love to?

• In Malachi, God describes their offerings as worthless because it was not their best but leftovers. How would God describe our offerings? 

• Discuss God's formula for successful living in Psalm 1.

Book Recommendations: Marriage

1) For Men Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. This is a great book for men. "For Men Only" focuses on marriage by examining the differences between men and women.

2) For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. This is a great book for women. "For Women Only" focuses on marriage by examining the differences between men and women.

3) Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? by Gary Thomas. The subtitle says it all. This is a timeless classic that addresses every facet of marriage.

4) The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller.