In Totality

There comes a time in every man's life where he comes to realize just how truly vast the world is, and how horrendously insignificant his day-to-day is in the grand scheme of things. When faced with this unfortunate truth, a man will take of two paths. He will either let this newfound feeling of insignificance overcome him, and over take him, and drag him down, and lay him to ruin. Or he will take his insignificance as a blank check, a license to live, to forge his own path, and hoist himself up to the highest pinnacle of creation.

"In Totality" was assembled during the time of this realization. Although life was good, life was changing, and this change brought about this realization. The works of "In Totality" encompass a year of serious introspection, brought about by the emotional end to a first love, falling out with close friends, and the feeling of existential anxiety that defines adolescence. Although the themes and subjects of the poetry ranges from love to seasons to dreams and visions, the defining moment of this portfolio, and of 2017, is the eclipse.

From a technical standpoint, much of the work of "In Totality" leaves me...wanting. As a first foray into formal, academic study of poetry, boundaries were pushed and experiments were undertaken. Perhaps the greatest flaw of this portfolio is metawriting. I can assure you, I have learned my lesson since 2017. While much work was modeled after existing poets, notably William Carlos Williams and Raymond Carver, a good deal of completely original compositions found their legs. A personal favorite is "Knowing You're Gone," and this resonates with me even to this day, although notable pieces include "In the Leaves" and "Fall Roses" (the basis for future short fiction piece "Silver and Amethyst") and "One of Those Nights" (the basis for future short fiction piece "What Doesn't Kill You"). 

Despite the lack of a formal theme, "In Totality" manages to tell a complete story within itself; one of longing, endurance, tragedy, and loss. And although I would much rather keep the vast majority of these pieces buried and hidden (for being as technically immature are they are emotionally), I cannot help but look back fondly on the saga of my life that lives on here. I am reluctant to admit it, but the poems of "In Totality" deserve their niche in the BOX as much as my pet pieces do.

So I invite you to step back into time, to meet a younger author, and to consider what might lie hidden in plain sight, that can only be viewed In Totality.