Love Meets Craft & Community…Let’s Talk About the Love
Documenting my life has been something I have considered for longer than I can remember. Not for any particular reason, not because it’s the latest trend or because I have some extraordinary life that would cause followers to “ooooh” and “ahhhh” at the unfathomable wonders of my daily routine.
It is simply because of my innate desire to inspire others.
Inspiration can spark from many things; your friends and family, social media, nature… I have always described myself as being “inspired by chaos”… by the many things that make my life beautiful, busy and exciting.
Everyone close to me knows I function best when every minute of my day is allocated to something, whether its job #1,2,3, volunteering, planning my next mini project or indulging in *scheduled* self care time. For those of you who are unaware of the career path I chose, I choose to do my very best to make a difference every day, primarily through the field of special education. I am always under the impression that I will never be able to connect with enough individuals through my work, hence the busy schedule-I choose to use the word “connect” rather than “help” because I have been educated just as much by the children and adults I have encountered, it’s always a reciprocal relationship,I am learning every day.
I am hoping through this blog you will not only learn a few things, but also be inspired to reach out in a new way to help others.
Educate yourself, love inclusively, and advocate for others…that’s the best way to start.
craft & Community...
How do they fit in this puzzle?
A few years back my initial plan was to head off to university, double major in fine art and psychology to see if I could somehow make a career for myself in the little-known field of ‘art therapy’. That would have been the dream, but my patience is something that has grown with me and as a bright eyed 17-year old with a ton of drive and determination-and little to no patience…I was ready to begin making a difference, more or less, immediately.
A shorter post-secondary career got me in the world of special education in less than 3 years where I could dive in head-first and make art and sensory exploration something that I could implement on the fly in times of need. Watercolour painting to calm someone feeling extra bouncy, or something as simple as a poster board and a crayon to help someone hash out the overwhelming feelings of frustration. It meant a great deal to me to see art and music having such an effect on the individuals I support…but I never considered the effect it could have on me.
A while back, I decided that on days that left me feeling defeated (which is absolutely okay-even when you love your job as much as I do) , I would teach myself a new skill or try to excel in something else before letting myself sleep on it. It wasn’t until after a very challenging day, that I picked up a crochet hook, made a strong tea and sat in front of YouTube for hours until I had a quarter of a blanket made. The feeling of accomplishment was overwhelming and I woke up the next day ready to face any adversity that came my way (and then see what else I could string together when I got home). That’s when I realized the effect of crafting on me, and the reason I’ve decided to use my hobby for the greater good.
Crafted goods for the greater good…where a portion of sold items, designed by me, will be donated to local charitable organizations and initiatives supporting special education.
plenty to say...
There's more to communication than simple speech
I always get excited when I see individuals on the Autism Spectrum (or living with various levels of ability) represented in the media. It gives people who may not have the opportunity to work with these individuals daily, to have a little insight on what life may be like for them or their caregivers while hopefully highlighting how their brains work so wonderfully different from ours.
I couldn’t contain myself recently when I came across two Pixar shorts that allow you to see through the eyes of two characters that I found close to my heart. Here’s a run down of what I love so much about both. I highly recommend that you check it out (and maybe try to watch it every day like I do…unless that’s excessive….).
Short #1: Float (Disney Plus under Pixar/Sparkshorts)
This short is not explicitly related to individuals with special needs, nor do I know if that was the original intention BUT as I always seem to do, I found a way to connect the dots to something near and dear to my heart. This short is a wonderful representation of a parent raising a child who is a little bit different than the other children they encounter. I love the way they display their troubles in a way that allows us to watch the parent attempt to navigate the situation the best way he knows how.
**Warning**
It’s a tear jerker, at least for me…but that’s not saying much.
Short #2: Loop (Disney Plus under Pixar/Sparkshorts)
My personal favourite. This short has warmed my heart for the last four days and deserves to be seen by everybody everywhere. What I love most about this depiction is that the main character is non-verbal… and is also a young adult. Often times, being non-verbal is assumed to be something that you will grow out of, something that can be magically taken away with a little Speech & Language Therapy and wishful thinking…and in a wonderful world, this would be the case. But for many families, non-verbal communication is something that will be a lifelong necessity. The most important thing to remember about individuals who communicate non-verbally is that just because they cannot speak, does not mean they have nothing to say.
If you are fortunate enough to get a spare moment, consider taking less than 20 minutes to watch these clips and gain insight from a new perspective.
Let me know what you think in the comments or on Instagram @inclusiveinspirations!
answering difficult questions...
inclusion and age-appropriateness
Disclaimer: When I speak about inclusion, I’m speaking to a mindset. The inherent (or learned) idea that all individuals should be given equal opportunity and treated like capable, contributing human beings. Often times, the word inclusion comes with a lot of opinions around whether immersing children with learning differences into mainstream classrooms works or doesn’t work-and please know that this is not what I’m referring to when I speak of inclusion.
When it comes to education, Children should learn in the environment that works best for them, whether they’re immersed into mainstream or placed in a setting with other children like themselves. There are many wonderful benefits to both…mainstream classes give the child opportunities to pick up language and social skills from their peers and small classes give the opportunity to learn in an individualized, sensory-friendly environment with a higher level of direct support. I have worked in many different settings and have seen children flourish in both, but when working in an ‘inclusive’ environment where children who are typically-developing and children with learning differences can learn and play together-you may get some questions. Thinking on your feet as an educator is a must-have quality, but how can we act and think quickly while still maintaining professionalism and considering age-appropriate responses? I’ll break down a few ways I’ve dealt with difficult questions and how to phrase them in a way that highlights the exceptional child’s ability!
#1. Does _________________ have a disability?
Firstly, disability is not a word I love to use. Everybody has varying levels of ability…areas of strength and areas of need. I often approach this with an initial statement of “________is still learning” and then continue into “although they sometimes have trouble sitting (or whatever behaviour prompted the question), they are really great at many other things that may even be difficult for you to do, and that is okay. What are some things they are really good at? What are some things you are still learning?”
Turning this question into a teachable moment is incredibly important, especially while taking the emphasis off the word ‘disability’. The goal is not to make the child feel as if they shouldn’t have asked the question, it is to allow them to be curious and educate them in a way that protects the dignity of the child they are curious about. I love the answers the kids come up with for what their peer is great at, maybe they can spell all of their friends names, repeat a movie line for line, open their yogurt without any teacher help…it casts a new light on the child they originally labeled as “disabled”. Self-reflection is a huge part of being a functioning member of society, and having the child reflect on what they are good at/could improve on is practicing an essential lifelong skill. Another way to intrigue that child to learn more about the abilities of their peer is to have them be a helper and demonstrate what a great example may look like. This instills empathy in the long run, which is a key part in promoting inclusion.
#2. Why do they do that?
Everybody has a ‘tell’ when they’re excited-some are just more obvious than others. I giggle a lot, bite my nails, text everyone I know immediately when something exciting is happening…for kids it can look different-especially for our extra-special kiddos. I typically answer the question of “why are they doing that?” (hand-flapping, ,eye-squinting, jumping, rocking) with pairing it to the emotion the child is conveying and asking the curious child “what do you do when you’re feeling _______?” for example, if a child jumps excessively when excited, I make a point to say “Wow, _____ is feeling so excited! They love to jump when they’re excited…what do you do when you’re excited?”. This gives the child the chance to identify the other child’s feelings next time, and be excited with them, or help them navigate whatever emotion they’re experiencing.
Other tips for instilling empathy in an inclusive setting could include involving the other children in the child’s routines. If a child is eager to help, let them have that opportunity….introduce them to the schedule, visuals & routines and allow them to be part of those transitions.
The most rewarding thing is to see a transition or routine play out flawlessly with only the interaction between the identified child and their peers, no educator needed. This is a step in fostering independence which is a whole other topic!
Don’t shy away from those difficult questions, sometimes they bring opportunity for awareness. If we start the inclusion mindset early on, imagine what a wonderful difference those kids can make as young adults.
How do you answer difficult questions? Comment below or reach out on Instagram @inclusiveinspirations
empathy & self-care:
feeling every emotion a little too deeply
I once came across a quote that read, “It is both a blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply” …words that resonated in my gut and thumped in my chest the second they ran through my brain.
I am empathetic. No, I am not bragging, I am admitting a struggle I have battled for years; both a blessing and a curse in my field of work and in my daily life. I avoid movies that may have an overly sad or heartwarming part, I fast-forward commercials that could cause me to feel a certain way, I avoid people I love when they may need me most because it hurts my heart too much to see them that way. I laugh often, VERY often, and cry tears of joy and sorrow more times per week than I can count. I love hard, and with everything I have to offer, even sometimes more than I can afford to spare.
A cycle of crying, laughing at myself crying, crying at my lack of emotional control and then spilling tears of laughter down my face at the ridiculous rhythm that is my empathetic self.
However, it isn’t always so easy to mask and when working with the vulnerable sector, there are bound to be times that emotions are high, crisis is happening and it’s up to you and your team to get things under control.
I’ve been there when students lose control, I’ve been there when children trash classrooms, I’ve been there when children have lost themselves in their emotions and stare at you blankly as if they have no idea who you are through their eyes of flowing tears. I’ve seen what sensory overload looks like, I’ve watched children hurt themselves because they feel shame, guilt, embarrassment or any emotion that they cannot seem to process at that moment. I have waited them out, and I have stayed by their side until the room finally stopped spinning, the noise became muted , the mess was cleaned up and their little world began to make sense again.
These are the moments I live for, the moments that make this career worth every minute (even the tough ones), because in that moment, they realized they made it. Their world didn’t end, the people that cared for them didn’t leave, and with some debriefing…life will go on as normal.
But what about me? No, that isn’t a selfish question as some people may assume. What happens to the person who watched the little person they care for fall apart in front of them? To the person who dodged flying items, hurled with frustration? To the person who may have felt helpless, held in tears, and did everything they could to let this little person know that everything was going to be okay, even when they may have been scared?
You cannot pour from an empty bucket.
Life moves on, but if this were to happen again tomorrow morning when you walked in the door (which it often does), could you give your entire self to do it over again?
This is where self-care plays a major role. Self-care is not selfish, though it does take practice and is absolutely vital in ensuring that when you wake up each morning, you are bringing the best version of yourself that you possibly can. It looks different for everyone and can include a variety of activities, people, objects and places…
No one can tell you what it is supposed to look like, only how it should feel.
Self-Care for me looks mostly like creativity. I love to write (can you tell?), crochet, use my Cricut machine, paint, draw, and make random (excessive) gifts for people. I like to walk (sometimes), drink tea, read books, snack on things, and spend time with my friends. Sometimes self-care even means getting away for the weekend with my (super supportive) boyfriend and eating/binge-watching shows.
Bottom line is, self-care isn’t always working out, eating incredibly healthy food and drinking 8 bottles of water. While this is good for you and can definitely improve your physical health (which is linked to your mental health), sometimes it is just about what is going to make you happy in that moment…make you click that reset button and give you the courage to tackle whatever the next day brings…even if it is a lot of tears.
Don’t be embarrassed to laugh extra hard (and maybe snort), sob while watching a commercial about a dog or eat that extra handful of goldfish crackers while you crochet yourself a hat. Life is short…and if we have learned anything lately, it is to cherish those little moments and love yourself and your loved ones a little harder.
Sending positive vibes, stay safe friends.
An excuse to slow down:
Mental health during a global pandemic
It only makes sense. Every person you come across (virtually or unlikely in person), will typically begin conversation by referencing the given circumstance; the global pandemic. It’s our “New Normal” as they say, so why does every day still feel so unfamiliar?
I am guilty of it too.
“How are you holding up?”
“How is *INSERT HIGH RISK LOVED ONE*?
“How is working from home going?”
Our lack of human contact, friendly conversation with strangers and fear of even encountering something unfamiliar has taken a massive toll on our human nature. It seems that although the virus is always our subconscious worry, it has now also become our conscious means of interaction.
With so much of our typical interaction, affection and communication in a windstorm of change, our collective mental health must be down the drain...right?
Or am I wrong?
Every individual deals with unfortunate circumstance in their own way...grief, trauma, unexpected global virus takeover...So how are you doing?
(Yes, I am doing what i said I try not to do in paragraph No. 2)
I, personally, am doing well...and no you should not feel guilty if you are not. My mental health has seen many ups and downs in the days since last March. But as I sit here and reflect as we approach the end of the year that we will all remember as the year that changed us… I am happy. I feel more myself than I have felt, maybe ever. I absolutely miss my friends, I miss my family, I miss grabbing a bite to eat with whoever I happened to be with at whatever restaurant we happen to walk past first, but I am so, so content.
The truth is, my metal health has never been better… and why?
I Needed an Excuse To Slow Down.
Being tired was never good enough. I could be fatigued, exhausted, completely burnt out and it was not good enough of an excuse to allow myself to STOP what I was doing and put Soph first.
I came across a requested video that I filmed the Wednesday before my school went into the longest March Break in history called “A Day In The Life”...
I woke up, worked out at 5 a.m, worked a 7.5 hour work day for the school board I work for, took a 7 minute nap, worked at my second job tutoring & providing respite, grabbed a third coffee of the day and headed for 2.5 more hours of Therapeutic Recreation work before getting home at almost 9 p.m. with a brain so full of adrenaline I could hardly sleep.
This year, my days look different.
I wake up with 20 minutes to spare to get myself ready, I purchase a coffee on the way to work, sing at the top of my lungs for my 15 minute commute before I put on my mask and any other necessary PPE.I do my absolute best for the 3 hours of my morning, forgiving myself for the little slips on the way…(wearing my rubber gloves outside causing them to freeze, raising my straw towards my mask-covered mouth, sighing or laughing so hard that my glasses AND my shield fog up, temporarily blinding me) before sitting down to shamelessly crochet mittens in the *very empty* staff room for my lunch.
When my afternoons are over, as hectic or subtle as they may be, I head home to climb into bed. Into the same bed that used to not see me until 12A.M. The same bed that my boyfriend climbed into alone while I worked, volunteered or even laminated into the late hours or even early hours of the morning. 4 P.M. each day I throw on my comfy clothes ( which I now own more of-anotherbonus)...sometimes I nap, sometimes I crochet, sometimes I quite literally sit there and daydream or watch the episode of the show that I wasn’t awake enough to watch from the night prior.
My point is, every night I take care of me. Something I’ve never ever done before. My friends took care of me, my family took care of me, they repaired the parts of me that needed to be whole again...and although they still all contribute greatly to the person I am today and I will forever be grateful...I learned to do it on my own.
It is absolutely okay if you are lost and scared and worried right now, I have days where I feel that way too. However, I truly urge you to look within and think, what do I have time for now that I never had time for before? A new hobby? A dusty book that’s been sitting on the shelf for who knows how long? A phone call you may have been procrastinating?
These times are more forgiving...You can be more forgiving.
Take the nap, skip the workout (or do an extra one if that’s what makes you happy), eat the snack, watch the movie, read the book, do whatever it is that is going to make you feel WHOLE. Because when our “normal” returns, and your canvas sits blank, your book collects dust, your friendship with a loved one falls on the back burner again, you’ll regret the time you spent feeling sorry for yourself.
Slow down, forgive yourself, and make the best of the time that seemed to stand still.