There are a whole lot of things that we learn to live with in life. Many of us go through a lot of very hard situations and yet some people live a relatively easy life. That is why no one is ever on the same page when it comes to dealing with a physical change in their life. It can be hard to hear for anyone that you are going to get a stoma. Surgery is simply never a fun thing to think about and the aftermath is always hard. But sometimes the fact that you are getting an ostomy is life-saving and can be a positive experience. Now that is truly hard to say because no one really wants to have an ostomy bag for the rest of their life, but when it comes to the life-saving capabilities it may have had, some of us are fine with it. So I want to go over how to learn to live with a new stoma and some of the fears that we all have.
It is true that I was filled with emotions when I found out I was going to get a stoma. Honestly, I usually only feel two emotions and those are love and anger. But this day, I went the whole gambit of emotions and fear, anger, and depression really took over me.
To begin with, I was simply afraid. I was afraid of the surgery and all the implications that go along with that. But more than that I was truly afraid of missing out on life. There were so many things that came to mind and I truly believed I was going to be handicapped in life. I know it sounds dumb, but I was afraid I would never be sexy again. I thought about sex and it simply scared me. I was afraid no one would ever thing I was beautiful or desirable again. That fear almost crushed me right then and there. I know that is a small part of life, but those things are what come to mind first and it is not the life-saving aspect of surgery, but what It could take from you. It was ok to feel that fear. It was normal to feel that fear and I suggest that you let it out. Tell those around you what you are feeling and then they can actually help you work through that fear. I then took my fear and moved those thoughts into questions for my Ostomy Nurse and Doctor. That is when that fear started to subside. I was educated on so many things and ways that it all works out just fine. But I needed to be told and given experience with those fears and how they could be overcome.
I then was simply angry about my situation. It is Ok, the ability to be furious is also a healthy emotion. The fact that you are angry lets you know you still care about life. This led me to research things to fast and furious that I wanted to know I would not miss out on life. I was mad about missing out on life. But research saved me and let me know that my life was honestly going to be normal and not going to change much. So just know its OK to feel and that it is all going to work out well.