Gayaab's Cash 'N Carry is a state-of-the-art Indian grocery store, soon to be located in the heart of the rolling fields and bustling appendages of Harrow. Known for having workers of a friendly demeanour that provide laudable service, Gayaab's receives only the finest reviews from their swathes of flabbergasted regulars who, after decades of visits, are still in awe of the shop and its employees.

Gayaab's Cash 'N Carry's grand opening will commence whenever the poor owner of 27 Rushout Avenue goes on holiday! Then we will ransack the house and set up a stall, entirely funded by Gayaab Ratel, who has (unknowingly) contributed all of his life savings to the project!

By purchasing a Gayaab's Cash 'N Carry OFFICIAL membership, one unlocks a new dimension of illimitable pleasures to experience instore. These include a £1.99 discount on your first shop, and a free melon with every 78th visit (there are more glorious wonders, but one has not enough time nor articulacy to describe them now). membership costs only £30 pounds/year.

Below right is an image of the queues already starting to form, outside this store disguised as a house. Journalists say the sheer magnitude of the queues exceed even those formed to view the Queen's coffin. Do you want to be stuck at the back of this cavalcade, doomed to never catch a gracious glimpse of Gayaab's Cash 'N Carry on opening day. Of course not. So come early and make sure you are there during one of the moments of all time.