Esteri Venla Väisänen

The Dark Urge

Esteri follows the backstory of The Dark Urge origin in Baldur's Gate III. At all times, she is an embracing Durge.

In her Companion AU, Esteri is a cold sorceress with the noble background. She can be recruited in the Underdark in Act I (not The Dark Urge in that case).

Basic Information

𝗕𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐂

NAME : Esteri Venla Väisänen

NICKNAME / ALIAS : The Dark Urge

AGE : 34 years old

DOB : 5th December

ASTROLOGY : Sagittarius

GENDER / PRON. : female, she/her

ORIENTATION : pansexual/ demiromantic

RACE : humanoid / Bhaalspawn

CLASS : sorcerer (dragonic bloodline: white) , [ (former) + rogue (assassin) ]

RELIGION / BELIEFS : Bhaal

𝐏𝐇𝐘𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋

HEIGHT : 5'11 / 180 cm (without heels)

WEIGHT : ~65 kg

HAIR : white

EYES : pale red

SCARS : none, autopsy scar across her abdomen/chest after tadpoled

PIERCINGS : earrings

OTHER : several moles and beauty marks on her face and body, subtle freckles

𝗕𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃

HOMETOWN : Baldur's Gate (upper city)

NATIONALITY : Baldurian

RESIDENCE : Baldur's Gate / travelling

LANGUAGES : common, dragonic

ACCENT : baldurian

OCCUPATION : Chosen of Bhaal, artist (sculptress), (former) assassin, leader of the Church of Bhaal

FAMILY : Anastasia Väisänen (mother) [deceased] , Jorn Väisänen (father) [deceased] , Jule Väisänen (sister) [deceased]

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋

POSITIVE TRAITS : • honest • creative • patient • mature

NEGATIVE TRAITS : • snobbish • indifferent • lack of empathy • narcissistic

Backstory

The albino babe

▌Esteri grew up as a milkman's child in the upper city of Baldur's Gate. Her parents — A married couple of influential figures who struggled to receive a child, saw it as a blessing, when the knock on their pompous mansion's door revealed a babe draped in red velvet. Albeit it was mostly clear Esteri was not their biological child, ( She did not share many similarities to her adoptive parents — Both elves with dark features & rather small statures ) they truly loved the girl. Her father made himself a name as a renowned painter, even being commissioned by lords & ladies alike. Esteri naturally picked up on his creativity, learning from him & experiencing joy while pursuing art.

She was eight years old when her parents tried for another child.

And to her family's fortune, it worked out. And to Esteri's misfortune, it worked out.

The girl wasn't happy with having to share the attention of her parents. She became quieter. Isolated herself more & more. Which naturally resulted in both father & mother spending more time with Esteri's little sister. Their biological child. Brushing it off as normal for the kid to act jealous, even more natural after being a single child for eight years, both elves did believe things would settle eventually.

Her 12th birthday.

▌It was the fourth year Jule was a member of her family. A leech, in Esteri's eyes. Her father began to teach her sibling how to paint. Just like when she herself was little. Took her with himself to smaller events, just like when she was little. Silence was the only thing that kept that boiling anger inside her. And to make herself a gift, Esteri decided she wished for blood this very day. And it shall be Jule's. Her first murder. In her father's studio. The young woman not only figuratively painted the room with the four-year-old's blood & intestines. Everything was red. The walls, every painting which was still in progress, every brush every stool. Red red red.

And how she basked in the scenery. It felt relieving. It felt so, so right. It couldn't possibly be wrong.

It took her parents a few hours to notice their little darling babe was missing. Finding Esteri drawing with Jule's blood while her body was already cold, unrecognizable, the shock sat deep. It was horrifying. A sickening display. Their little treasure, their little golden girl which appeared at their doorstep years ago obviously was to blame. And Esteri wouldn't even deny it. She . . . was proud, excited even.

After her first masterpiece.

▌Safe to say, her parents were not sharing the human child's ectasis. She must be possessed, thus, they tried their hardest to search for a cure. No church could help them, no exorcism had an effect. That child was pure evil. Turning their child over to the authorities was their last straw, but a wise one, so they thought. That twelve-year-old girl would be locked up in the city's dungeon system until they could figure out a date when to execute her, very sure she was just a vessel to something horrifying, something unspeakable.

But somehow, the girl did not stay long behind bars. Vanished. From one night to the other. Not to be seen in the near future. Freed by bhaalists & ending up spending her remaining childhood in Bhaal's Temple, Esteri realized ( and more importantly, got taught very intensely ) she was Bhaal's flesh. His daughter. Not some elven snob's kid from the upper city. Something great.

And of course, she came back to end her "parent's" life. The now 16-year-old made a great spectacle out of her once loved ones' bodies, similar to her first kill. And it felt almost as refreshing as Jule's. They held her down for a decade. She was not able to embrace her true purpose. They deserved nothing less.

Recruitment / Personal Quest

Recruiting Esteri (Alternative Universe)

Esteri can be found at the Grymforge, locked up in a cramped cage next to the spiders. She will act rather hostile towards the player, mistaking them as allies of her captors before the tadpole starts a connection with the player.

After discussing the events quickly, the player can decide to help Esteri out of her situation by getting the keys to her cage from a duergar in the nearby area next to the staircase leading to Moonrise Towers.

Esteri can then be persuaded into joining the party, later opening up about her abduction from Baldur's Gate and her revealing she is a noble woman from the upper city and mainly working as an artist, getting paid for drawing portraits of royal lords and ladies, apparently.

If the player plays an instrument next to Esteri's cage, she will continue to insult them. If that happens too many times, a nearby duergar will tell the player to stop and will then guard the cage until the quest "Free True Soul Nere" is completed or the duergar are killed.

Should the player not recruit her, they have another chance in Act II, finding her locked up again at Moonrise Towers, being in a cell next to the tieflings and gnomes. Is Esteri recruited here instead of the Grimforge, the player can't start a romance with her.

Esteri's Location:

Esteri is locked up in a cage next to the spider cages.

Durgetash Section

Content warning for: death, murder, blood, manipulation, toxic relationships, stalking, obsessive behavior.

Disclaimer! All headcanons regarding Gortash are based off my dear friend @narcisseart 's. I can not shut up about how she fucking KNOWS that man, it is honestly scary. I'm in love with her interpretation of his character. Thank you for being an awesome friend, you know I could write books about my appreciation for you. Many kisses your way ♥

Before...

we go into the durgetash angst, a little explanation why Esteri's relationship life is doomed from the start.

Her first partner was a young woman who shared her passion for painting ; she kept the truth about her urges to herself for the longest time, until Esteri began to realize, she was falling for the woman. That was her first time falling in love, by the way. She is demisexual - affection has to be build first. Her girlfriend, after eventually coming clean with the truth, was supportive as could be (reassuring Esteri, being understanding despite her macabre work and the fact that she is a cult leader etc.). Her support, however, was sadly the lady's undoing. When they got intimate, Esteri experienced a biiig urge episode, mauling her girlfriend and sobering up to her love being only blood and guts.

That was a huge fucking shock for Esteri, of course it was. But instead of cursing upon her father, she swallowed it down, telling herself it was inevitable ; Urges are a gift, and everyone dying by her hand should be blessed. It hurt, nonetheless. Hurt enough to mark her forever.

Esteri, from that point on, became a cold individual. Never showing emotions, never letting anyone closer than absolutely necessary. She did not build relations past the point of business partnerships. Should she happen to sleep with someone, she made sure the person was disposable - that there was no attachment. Because they would not survive anyway.

Gortash

▌ She made very few 'friends'. The closest to her were members of the Temple of Bhaal, Sceleritas Fel, her father. When her god called to partner up with the chosen of Myrkul and Bane, Esteri expected not more than, well, just another gig. Father knows best, she works in his name among the mortals.

Wow, she hated both of them.

Ketheric a little less at first, because he was rather straight to the point. Gortash was annoying to her. Just a slimy wannabe noble who worked himself up in ranks. The kind she usually sacrificed on a weekend. But the Absolute plan happened regardless of her disinterest. I like to think, after many meetings about their beautiful death cult, Esteri did not realize how she warmed up slowly. That these dates didn't end with an " Okay, we will talk about the next steps on Monday " but " Okay, how was your week so far, productive? ". And dear god she did not have this in her life before. Every day, she plays the role of a leader, being surrounded by yes-sayers and church members who kneel in front of her. It's always " Your greatness, my lady, our glorious death bringer. " but now, it was also " My dear ".

Gortash has a silver tongue, he knows his way around people and Esteri slowly but surely was no different. A little harder to crack, certainly. The fact that she showed a minimum amount of emotions or reactions only motivated him to work harder, spend more time unraveling her, get SOMETHING, even if it is a quirk of her lip, a raise of her brow. Anything works. For the first time, she was not the one who tried to drag an emotion out of someone, but she was the very object of interest. And that was very confusing.

Their line between partnership and friendship blurred. She began to enjoy his presence, sought this feeling of mutual understanding. The clever ideas, the idle talk, just being near him. Esteri never in her life would have thought she could honestly say that someone will ever be her equal, but oops, well, here they were.

Esteri is an obsessive person, sadly. I talked about the trauma that comes with developing feelings, due to her first girlfriend. She tends to work through it by isolating herself, trying to choke down these new emotions building before they get too much. Drawing the person over and over again, burning them afterward. It's a form of self-defense. What happened to her first partner is something she does not want to repeat. Murder should not come with weak regret. She had that phase with Gortash too. The guy probably didn't hear of her for several weeks because that girlfailure locked herself up in her chambers, screaming her lungs out, ripping her hair out just to blow off steam. Spoiler alert, it was ✨useless✨.

New plan: She will just play it cool. Ever the indifferent one, she could play the part a little more. No biggie. Esteri recognized the feeling by now. That was more than a partnership or friendship. Of course, she yearned for closeness, but she knew closeness meant death, and she would not want to lose Gortash.

Why they did not do the birds and the bees

▌ I yapped about her trauma, you know that by now. From Gortash's side though, sex is something very unpersonal. A means to an end, an opening for alliances, forming bonds which open opportunities. It is a tool. It's not the act that he would be looking forward to, but all that comes afterwards. At this point, I might just post a little screenshot from Doc.

That guy was treated like shit his whole fucking life. His parents were awful people, he had to withstand an abusive devil, it makes sense that something softer, more honest and careful, would undo that man more than a fuck. WHICH IS WONDERFUL IN THIS SITUATION! Esteri is scared she might hurt him if they ever get intimate, Gortash already enjoys a little stroking through his hair more than a lay. AMAZING. (they would just need to communicate that…)

I'm not a durgetash-fuck-nasty-every-time-they-have-a-free-minute hater. That scenario just does not make sense with Esteri and him. They both come from a place that does not require sex, but a deeper, meaningful bond. Something careful and easy.

Another Doc take which wraps it up perfectly imo, TLDR:

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