Dear Kama and Rati,
I have been married to my wife for many centuries. Everything was smooth sailing, but I must admit I have always been a bit insecure about our relationship. I think most would say that my wife is out of my league. She is much younger than me and one of the most beautiful women I've ever met. The trouble began when I left town for a prayer trip. When I returned, I could immediately tell that something was off. The entire town was talking about this giant, five-headed white elephant that was near my hut in the woods. As far as I know, my wife doesn't have any friends that own elephants (especially ones with multiple heads). When I questioned her about this mystery, she got very quiet. She almost couldn't even look me in the eyes! The next couple of days were very strange. I thought maybe she was sick or something. That was until I went into the village to pick up some herbs. That is when I overheard the truth! I was at the fruit table when I heard someone gossiping about my wife. I heard all about this "hunky" fellow that rode into town and stayed in my house! I immediately went home. She didn't even try to deny it! Now, you won't believe her excuse. She told me that this god was disguised to look like me. I got so angry that I didn't stay to listen to the rest of her pathetic lies! How do I get over this betrayal? How can I make sure that my wife will never cheat on me again? Please, Kama and Rati, tell me how to deal with this!
Sincerely,
Vengeful Victim
This is a truly terrible thing to happen in a relationship. I cannot imagine how hurt and angry I would be if Rati cheated on me with another man! Recovering from an affair is very difficult and lonely. But...it is not impossible! Sometimes the road of love is filled with many bumps and obstacles. In order to continue forward, you must find a way past the hardships. Do not worry my friend, for I have a few suggestions on how you can proceed.
First of all, cheating is a horrific crime and you have every right to be angry! In order to move forward in your relationship, you must release the anger from your heart. But how does one do this? The answer is: justice! Your wife MUST pay for her actions! May I suggest a banishment? Or if you think she deserves more than that, how about a curse? What if you turn her invisible for a couple of years? Maybe try turning her to stone (that's a good one). If you need some help with this, I can refer you to a couple of sages that specialize in curses.
This might sound harsh, but I really think it would help. It would give your wife time to reflect, and it would give you time to heal. When your wife's punishment is over, you will both be ready to love again.
Oh my. Before I offer my advice, I must tell you how deeply sorry I am that this has happened to you. Both you and your wife must be struggling right now. It is perfectly normal for you to be angry with her, but I believe that you want move on from this affair. Allow me to give you my own advice for healing.
In your letter, you wrote that you left your wife before she could clearly explain what happened. I understand that you were shocked and angry, but maybe you should hear the full story. Listen to what your wife has to say! You mentioned that perhaps this was a trick by a God? Unfortunately, these kinds of things happen. Gods can be cruel and thoughtless with their actions. Your wife could very well be telling the truth! You can only be sure if you take the time to listen with an open heart and mind. Remember that you love her! We all make mistakes, but true love gives you the power to forgive.
Even if your wife is telling the truth, this will still be a difficult thing to work through. For this, I would suggest a nice vacation for the two of you. Take some time to talk and rekindle your romance. Also, I've heard of this new thing called couple's therapy! Maybe you could give that a shot.
A Note from the Editor (Author's Note):
The idea for this letter comes from a story in The Ramayana. Basically, Ahalya has an affair with the God Indra while married to the sage Gautama. In the version I read, Indra tricked Ahalya by impersonating Gautama. So she had no idea what she was doing. Of course, Gautama gets angry and curses his wife. There are many different versions of this story. Sometimes Ahalya knows that Indra is in disguise and the punishment for Ahalya changes. I included some of the variations of her punishment in Kama's letter. In my retelling, Gautama is "Vengeful Victim", Ahalya is the wife, and Indra (who usually rides a white elephant) is the "hunk."
I chose this tale because it's a pretty complicated situation! All of these characters clearly need advice. When reading the original, I mostly felt sorry for Ahalya. She was tricked by a god then her husband overreacted to the entire situation! Not cool. However, I decided to write from Gautama's perspective because I figured it would be more entertaining. Writing an angry letter is more fun than a sad one! I was trying to make it kinda of silly and fun, so I hope that worked.
Kama's advice tells the story of what really happened in the Ramayana. Rati offers a more rational and kind point of view. I personally wish Gautama would've listened to Rati, but at least Rama showed up to break the curse! Thanks for reading, I'm excited to see your suggestions.