Download Funny Jokes

Read on, and take your favorite joke to dazzle your coworkers and managers. The best thing about these jokes is that you can tell them anywhere. They're work-appropriate, so you can even take them home to your family! And if you'd like to join our funny crew, we're hiring.

Flex your funny bone with these kid-approved jokes that will keep every member of the family in stitches. Pick a category or take turns going down the list to see how many you get right. Keep the list handy for road trips or to make mealtime more fun! While you're at it, check out this list of 100 dad jokes to keep the laughs rolling.

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Make your family time more enjoyable with a few of these jokes to create some laughter. A little laughter brightens the mood and makes the random moments of life more joy-filled. Spend time with the crew and LOL with these great jokes then add a few of your own! Also, be sure to try out a few of these knock knock jokes to spice things up.

Animal JokesWhat animal loves a baseball game?

A bat.What did the Dalmatian say after finishing her breakfast?

That hit the spot.What is black and white and red all over?

An embarrassed zebra.Where is a cow's favorite place to go?

The mooooovies.What do you call an alligator that solves mysteries?

An investi-gator.Why didn't the frog park his car on the street?

He didn't want to get toad.What's a cat's favorite color?

Purrr-ple.What do ducks love to put in their soup?

Quakers.Why did the lion spit out the clown?

He tasted funny.What has six eyes but cannot see?

Three blind mice.Space JokesWhat is an astronaut's favorite button on a keyboard?

The spacebar.How do you know when the moon has had enough to eat?

When it's full.What do planets love to read?

Comet books.What do Martians like to drink?

Gravi-TEA.What is an astronaut's favorite meal of the day?

Launch.Why did the alien go to the doctor?

He was looking a little green.What did Venus say to Saturn?

Give me a ring.What do you call ticks in space?

Luna-ticks.What do planets sing in a choir?

Nep-tunes.Why did the sun refuse to go to school?

It already had a million degrees.Sample Sign Ups Create Sign UpWeather JokesWhat's a tornado's favorite game to play at a party?

Twister.What fruit has to put on sunscreen at the beach?

Bananas - because they peel.What doesn't get any wetter no matter how much it rains?

The ocean.What is a gust of wind's favorite color?

Blew.Why did the woman take a ketchup bottle outside when it was raining?

Because it was raining cats and hot dogs.What does a cloud wear under his raincoat?

Thunderwear.Where do happy lightning bolts live?

Cloud nine.What does a ghost wear to splash in puddles?

BOOOOOOOts.What did one hurricane say to the other hurricane?

I have my eye on you.What is the sky's favorite accessory?

A rainbow.Coordinate a carpool for away games with an online sign up. View an Example

Cross the Road JokesWhy did the rubber chicken cross the road?

To stretch her legs.Why did the turkey cross the road?

To show he wasn't chicken.Why did the fish cross the road?

To get to the other tide.How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across.Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop.Why did the snake cross the road?

To get to the other ssssssside!Why did the baby skeleton cross the road?

Because her mummy was on the other side.Why did the nose cross the road?

It was tired of getting picked on.Why did the plate get stuck on the road?

It saw a fork ahead.Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

Because he didn't have the guts.Holiday JokesWhat music is best to listen to on St. Patrick's Day?

Shamrock and roll.What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

Snowflakes.Why did Santa get a parking ticket on Christmas Eve?

He was parked in a snow parking zone.What type of flower should you not give on Valentine's Day?

Cauli-flower.Where does the Easter Bunny eat breakfast?

IHOP.How do gingerbread people make their beds?

With cookie sheets.Why does the Easter Bunny's hair always look so good?

He uses a lot of hare spray.What do you get when a snowman crosses a vampire?

Frostbite.Why do leprechauns love to garden?

They have green thumbs.Why didn't the skeleton want to go to the Valentine's dance?

His heart wasn't in it.Sports JokesWhy did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

He had a hole in one.Why are cookies and milk a basketball team's favorite dessert?

They love to dunk.What did the baseball glove say to the ball?

Catch you later!Why do basketball players carry extra napkins?

They are always dribbling.Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarter back.Why do tennis players make the worst neighbors?

They make a lot of racquet.What is an insect's favorite sport?

Cricket.What sport do hairdressers love the most?

Curling.What is a cheerleader's favorite drink?

Root beer.Make your family time more enjoyable with a few of these jokes to create some laughter. A little laughter brightens the mood and makes the random moments of life more joy-filled. Spend time with the crew and LOL with these great jokes then add a few of your own! Also, be sure to try out a few of these knock knock jokes to spice things up.

Lastly, humor can improve customer interactions. When employees have a lighthearted and friendly approach, it can enhance customer satisfaction and loyalty. A well-placed joke or funny anecdote can make a lasting impression and create a positive brand image.

But these jokes may actually be good for his kids, and all kids. A study found that dad jokes, which are embarrassing, can help children build stamina when dealing with embarrassment as they grow into adults, resulting in being comfortable with who they are.

The dichotomy of penetrator and penetrated is most stark in jokes set in prisons in which the use of force determines who will play the dominant role of the master and who will be humiliated by being effeminized. (Davies 162)

Clearly, the paradigm described here is very gendered, even as it relates to all-male settings. On one side of the dichotomy is maleness, equated with penetrating, dominating, winning, and socially powerful identities. On the other is femaleness, equated with being penetrated, victimhood, losing, and socially disadvantaged identities. By using images of anal penetration to link a socially stigmatized group with femininity, these jokes translate other forms of prejudice into the language of misogyny.

Identified as one of the simple forms of oral literature by the Dutch linguist Andr Jolles,[4] jokes are passed along anonymously. They are told in both private and public settings; a single person tells a joke to his friend in the natural flow of conversation, or a set of jokes is told to a group as part of scripted entertainment. Jokes are also passed along in written form or, more recently, through the internet.

Stand-up comics, comedians and slapstick work with comic timing and rhythm in their performance, and may rely on actions as well as on the verbal punchline to evoke laughter. This distinction has been formulated in the popular saying "A comic says funny things; a comedian says things funny".[note 1]

Any joke documented from the past has been saved through happenstance rather than design. Jokes do not belong to refined culture, but rather to the entertainment and leisure of all classes. As such, any printed versions were considered ephemera, i.e., temporary documents created for a specific purpose and intended to be thrown away. Many of these early jokes deal with scatological and sexual topics, entertaining to all social classes but not to be valued and saved.

The earliest extant joke book is the Philogelos (Greek for The Laughter-Lover), a collection of 265 jokes written in crude ancient Greek dating to the fourth or fifth century AD.[8][9] The author of the collection is obscure[10] and a number of different authors are attributed to it, including "Hierokles and Philagros the grammatikos", just "Hierokles", or, in the Suda, "Philistion".[11] British classicist Mary Beard states that the Philogelos may have been intended as a jokester's handbook of quips to say on the fly, rather than a book meant to be read straight through.[11] Many of the jokes in this collection are surprisingly familiar, even though the typical protagonists are less recognisable to contemporary readers: the absent-minded professor, the eunuch, and people with hernias or bad breath.[8] The Philogelos even contains a joke similar to Monty Python's "Dead Parrot Sketch".[8] ff782bc1db