The first and most obvious meaning of the song is that we need to remember those who have passed. Dia de Los Muertos is a celebration of this and is used to help support those who have done so on their spiritual journey.

Side note: this may be part of the reason why Coco is forgetting her father. The song was all she had of him, the only thing she could remember him by. But her mother immediately banned all music after Hector left, leaving Coco with the only connection to her father as something that was forbidden.


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The dead are honored with ofrendas-small, private altars honoring each person. Ofrendas often have flowers, candles, the favorite foods and beverages of the departed, photos, and personal mementos of the person being remembered.

I am a hospice social worker and of Mexican American heritage. Here for the last century mostly my family follows Catholicism but of course coco is a beautiful illustration of the custom. One of my workers just died. She was an identical twin diagnosed with cystic fibrosis at birth. She grew up seizing camp friends with the same disease die and then became a grid counselor. She would often talk about being remembered and in 51 years lived with donor lungs as did her sister. She loved Coco. Her book or rather their book was made into a documentary. The power of two. She did writing thru loss workshops at our agency. Anyway I read a lot of grief books. I will look into more of your work and use this article when working with families with younger family members. I favor memoirs over clinical books. Thanks!!


Mama Imelda

Imelda Rivera was left alone to raise her daughter Coco when her musician husband Hector went off to tour with his friend, Ernesto de la Cruz. Imelda knew that when there's no one left in the living world who remembers you, you disappear from the Land of the Dead. So, to spite Hector, she tore his head from the family portrait, leaving him forever anonymous.

We had five years of being spat on [in the UK], and it was revolting. And they spat at you if they liked you. If they didn't like it they smashed your gear up. One night, I remember I saw blood on my T-shirt, and I think Joe Strummer got meningitis when spit went in his mouth.

This moment with Miguel and Coco can be seen in memory neighborhoods throughout United Church Homes and beyond. Residents who may not remember when and where they are, who may not speak hear a hymn or a piece of music and remember all the words. They often sing along and they, too, share a memory they associate with that song. Wherever we are in the aging process, may we remember the lessons from Coco: that death is a beautiful part of life; that our ancestors continue on in our lives through the stories and memories we share of them; and that music can be a powerful tool to remember and connect.

Coco, the 2018 Oscar winner for Best Animated Feature, tells the story of a young boy Miguel who idolizes a famous deceased musician and is whisked away to the spirit world on Dia de los Muertos or the Day of the Dead. To honor the ancestors, the families cook their favorite foods, gaze upon their pictures set up on an ofrenda (altar), and tell stories about them. Miguel, even at age 12, knows the stories of his deceased ancestors, spanning four generations prior to his. He knows because (presumably) every year the stories are told. We find out later how key this repeated storytelling is: in the land of the dead, when a spirit is no longer remembered by anyone living, he or she dies a second death and is gone forever.

So how do we remember in a way that embraces both the pain and the joy of the past? Coco resolves the tension through the support of family and community. Remembering rightly will be hard, but we do not have to bear that weight alone.

really, natalia lafourcade has shaped my life soundtrack from "en el 2000" to holding a negroni while I sing along to "remember me" during the oscars, girl i love you now break into "t s sabes quererme" ff782bc1db

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