How to Practice DBT's 'Opposite Action' Skill in Everyday Life
How to Practice DBT's 'Opposite Action' Skill in Everyday Life
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a powerful treatment designed to help individuals manage intense emotions, regulate behavior, and improve their overall mental health. Originally developed to treat borderline personality disorder, DBT has since been adapted for a variety of mental health challenges, including dialectical behavior therapy for depression and anxiety. One of its core skills is Opposite Action, which encourages people to act contrary to their emotional urges when those emotions are unhelpful or unjustified.
In this article, we will explore how you can apply DBT’s Opposite Action skill in your everyday life to reduce emotional distress and make healthier choices.
Opposite Action is a technique within DBT that involves identifying when an emotion leads to an urge that might not be constructive or appropriate for the situation. By deliberately choosing to do the opposite of what the emotion urges, individuals can break the cycle of negative emotions and behaviors. This skill is particularly helpful for situations where acting on the emotion could be harmful, such as avoiding important tasks due to anxiety or lashing out in anger.
Opposite Action works best when:
Your emotions are not based on the facts of the situation: For example, feeling angry because you’ve assumed someone was intentionally rude, but later realizing their behavior was unintentional.
Acting on the emotion could cause harm: If your first reaction is to avoid a social event because of anxiety or confront someone aggressively due to frustration, Opposite Action can guide you toward a healthier response.
Reduces emotional intensity
Encourages positive behavior changes
Helps you build resilience to difficult emotions over time
Here are five key steps to practicing Opposite Action:
Identify the Emotion: Start by recognizing and labeling what you are feeling. For instance, are you feeling sad, angry, or anxious?
Determine if the Emotion is Justified: Ask yourself whether your emotional response fits the facts of the situation. Is your fear based on a real threat, or are you anxious about something unlikely to happen?
Identify the Urge: Emotions often come with urges. If you're feeling sad, your urge might be to isolate yourself. If you're angry, your urge might be to argue or lash out.
Do the Opposite Action: Once you've identified the urge, consciously choose to do the opposite. If your urge is to avoid something, go ahead and face it. If your impulse is to yell, practice speaking calmly or walking away.
Repeat as Needed: Like any skill, Opposite Action takes practice. You might need to apply it several times before it becomes a natural response, but consistency will help build healthier emotional habits.
Here are some examples of how you can apply the Opposite Action skill in common scenarios:
Anxiety and Avoidance: You feel anxious about attending a social event and want to stay home. The Opposite Action would be to attend the event, even though it feels uncomfortable.
Anger and Confrontation: You’re angry at a co-worker and feel the urge to confront them harshly. The Opposite Action would be to remain calm and address the situation respectfully, or take a break until you’ve cooled down.
Sadness and Withdrawal: You’re feeling down and want to stay in bed all day. The Opposite Action is to get up, take a walk, or engage in an activity that lifts your mood.
Guilt and Over-Apologizing: You feel guilty about a mistake and want to excessively apologize. The Opposite Action would be to apologize once sincerely and then practice self-compassion.
While Opposite Action is a useful skill, it can be challenging to implement, especially when emotions feel overwhelming. Here are some tips for success:
Start Small: Begin by using Opposite Action in low-stakes situations to build confidence.
Use Mindfulness: Practicing mindfulness can help you become more aware of your emotional urges and better able to respond in the moment.
Self-Compassion: Don’t be hard on yourself if you struggle to act opposite to your urges. Be patient and gentle with yourself, recognizing that change takes time.
Consider Professional Support: If practicing these skills feels overwhelming, working with DBT therapists or attending a DBT retreat can provide guidance and support in learning how to use Opposite Action effectively.
Practicing DBT’s Opposite Action skill is an effective way to manage difficult emotions and build healthier responses to challenging situations. By identifying your emotions, recognizing unjustified urges, and acting in opposition to those urges, you can take control of your emotional responses and reduce distress in everyday life.
Remember, learning Opposite Action can be challenging at first, but with practice, it becomes easier and more effective over time. If you're struggling to implement this skill on your own, don't hesitate to seek professional support. Many DBT treatment options, such as therapy with DBT therapists or intensive programs like a DBT retreat, can provide the tools and structure you need to make lasting changes.
If you're looking for personalized help, consider dialectical behavior therapy in Seattle or your local area to work with a trained professional who can guide you on your journey.