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Enjoy an excerpt from our CEO's personal blog -
Being a Success at the Office Means Little if you’re a Failure at Home
Being a success at the office means little if you’re a failure at home. I read that in one of the “God’s Little Instruction Book’s” a number of years ago, and it stuck with me because it’s the difficult part about being an entrepreneur. I also heard once that the best part about being an entrepreneur is that you get to decide which seven days of the week you want to work. It’s true. Being an entrepreneur and doing your own thing is both a blessing and a curse.
This is also true in crisis intervention. You can get so caught up in what you’re doing that you forget to take care of yourself. You do a great job when you’re at work. You help patients. You help people with whom you’re interacting. You’re a positive role model. You come home from work . . . and you’re exhausted.
I’ve been there. I worked at one hospital for about eight years. My commute was about an hour and a half to and from work every day--usually when traffic was bad. During those years I went through a couple of relationships. Quite honestly, in looking back I realize there were some good relationships, and maybe others weren’t so bad. The fact was though, that I gave all I had on a daily basis while I was on the job. There was a heavy price for that. I wasn’t taking care of me and who I was during the other hours of the day when I wasn’t at work. When I was at work I was so focused on trying to do the best job I could that I had nothing left for when I got home. As a result, I failed to take proper care of those waiting for me there.
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I want you to really think about it as you’re reading this. I’m hoping that you’ll gain something from my experience. I hope that you will be self-aware and recognize that if you are getting to point where you’re focused so intently on success, or money, or getting ahead, that you recognize it may be coming at the price of sacrificing time with family, or time with loved ones. If you’re busy achieving your goals, making sure you’re meeting other people’s needs, but ignoring your own outside of your work, then something’s off. It would be my suggestion that you try to get that balance corrected.
It’s important to find some type of balance. John Maxwell talks about balance. He doesn’t necessarily believe there is such a thing as complete balance, but rather he believes there are seasons you go through in your life. Times when you’re more focused at work and other times when you’re more focused at home. The trick is in trying to keep those seasons equal. For instance, recognizing that you must be in a winter phase because you’re very focused on work. This is when you need to cycle back through the other seasons to readjust. Please keep in mind that a success at work is no good if you’re a failure at home.
If you need help, how are you going to get it? If you need support from your coworkers, how are you going to get it? Do you carry a radio? That’s great. However, those of us who have been in hands-on situations know that, most often, the first thing to fly off your belt in a real fight is your radio, the walkie-talkie. You can’t get to it. You’re struggling with the other person and help, which you desperately need, is just a phone call crisis prevention intervention certification training or a walkie-talkie push of the button away; but you can’t get to it. So, how are you going to get that help?
Years ago, I was involved in an incident on a unit that had everything to do with communication difficulties. One evening I was assigned to an adolescent residential female unit. It was late, past lights out, so the patients were all in their rooms. I was sitting at a small desk in front of the nursing station, which was behind glass windows. The nursing staff in the station could see me, and they could see the entire unit through the windows, although we were not able to hear each other. There was a phone on the desk, however which I was supposed to use if necessary.
So, the nursing staff was inside this glass enclosed room doing all their paperwork and documentation for the shift. I was sitting out in front, in the unit, the evening shift was going on, and everything was calm. I remember thinking it was going to be a quiet night. All of a sudden I looked down the hallway and I saw two patients trying to cross the hall undetected. I watched as one girl ran across the hallway to the other girl, and I immediately heard an argument starting up. Instinctively I jumped up and I started to head down the hall, when I quickly realized, “Oh, crap, I’m going to need help.” I needed more than just the two nurses who were inside the station. I needed the crisis response team to come. I needed to get to the phone. I turned around, frantically waving my arms towards the nursing station windows, but none of the nurses in the station saw me. I got back to my desk and quickly grabbed the phone.
As I picked up the receiver it came right out of the phone. It had been completely disconnected and was not working. Later I found out that the night before, one of the kids had thrown that phone across the unit during a crisis. The staff, not really thinking about it, because that wasn’t the most important thing they were dealing with at the time, set the phone back up on the desk. They didn’t realize the receiver had actually been broken. Neither had I. This is why I took a crisis intervention course.
The point is, when you go to your unit, show up for duty, clock in, etc. wherever it is, be sure to check your walkie-talkies, your telephones, whatever communication system you have available. It’s not enough to just say, “Oh, yeah, if I need help I’m going to get on my radio or my cell phone and call for help.” No. Make sure you check it at the beginning of your shift, throughout the shift, and at the end of your shift, as well. Just check it. It’s better to know ahead of time that you have a problem with communication rather than waiting until you have an issue. When you know, you can make alternate arrangements or get the problem fixed with non violent crisis intervention.
When you need help, they need to find you, they need to get to you, but first, they need to know you’re in trouble. You can only let them know if you’re able to communicate with them. Know how you will do so, prior to needing to do so.