Other recent works reckoning with toxic "nice guys'' include Emerald Fennell's Oscar-winning, zeitgeist-capturing film Promising Young Woman (2020), which gave us a slew of would-be date rapists who protest in so many words "But I'm a nice guy!" when the drunk woman who they took home to take advantage of, reveals herself as sober, avenging angel Cassie (Carey Mulligan). The crucial thing about these men is that they actually believe that they are nice guys. "You have [these] characters that genuinely believe they're innocent," says Dr Catherine Wheatley, a senior lecturer in film studies at Kings College London. "It's a problem of conflicting visions." Arguably, this only serves to make their villainy even more disconcerting.

Elsewhere, the Irish thriller Rose Plays Julie (2019) by Christine Molloy and Joe Lawlor, shows the charm that can smooth over great malignance with its story of a young woman Rose confronting her long-lost biological father Peter, a smooth celebrity archaeologist with a secret history of sexual offences. Meanwhile over on TV, Michaela Coel's incredible drama I May Destroy You showed violation of consent could be committed by the most innocuous seeming perpetrators: Zain (Karan Gill) who slyly removes his condom during sex with Arabella (Coel), is initially styled as the nice guy, a cosy alternative for Arabella to another night in alone with her PTSD from a previous assault.


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Among other things, these toxic "nice guy" narratives are exposing the kind of insidious paradigms of "acceptable" masculinity long implanted in our culture by film and TV. What's clever about You's knowing screenplay is that it invites the audience to see how Joe's self-justifying sociopathy sits at the extreme end of a behavioural spectrum idealised by pop culture as romantic, masculine and heroic. In series one, Joe is obsessed with an ill-fated girl named Beck (Elizabeth Lail), and breaks into her apartment to hack her computer and read her messages. She returns unexpectedly, so he hides in her shower, as the voiceover asserts: "I'm not worried, I've seen enough romcoms to know that guys like me are always getting into jams like this."

Indeed films, and particularly romcoms, have long had a troubling tradition of valorising "nice guy" protagonists whose behaviour is in fact very toxic indeed, and framing boundary-transgressions as aspirational attempts to win the fair maiden. In Richard Curtis's About Time (2013), for example, Curtis presents a whimsical time-travel movie with a likeable lead in Domnhall Gleeson who nevertheless uses the ability to go back in time to repeatedly replay a sexual situation with his eventual wife Mary (Rachel McAdams) to his advantage. It's an action that, as critic Ryan Gilbey pointed out in the New Statesman, "would play in any other genre as date-rape. He just happens to use time-travel rather than Rohypnol."

Another Richard Curtis film: Love, Actually (2003) has similarly drawn a lot of flack over the years for the notorious scene in which Mark (Andrew Lincoln) shows up on the doorstep of his friend's wife, Juliet (Keira Knightley) with cue cards proclaiming his love. Despite this being out of the blue, with no precedent in their relationship for this kind of intrusion, she is charmed and hence the film validates this doorstepping and wraps it up in the bow of romanticism. Defending it last year, another actress in the film, Martine McCutcheon told Digital Spy, "I think people do crazy things when they're in love". But that's a justification that, while core to classic rom-com thinking, is very dangerous when applied to real life, love being used to justify many terrible actions. It could also have come straight from the mouth of You's "nice guy" villain Joe, as he commits another heinous crime in the name of pursuing the latest object of his affection.

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Years before Greta Gerwig's "Barbie" had Ryan Gosling flexing his comedy muscles as Ken, "The Nice Guys" gave him a chance to cut loose after a decade of playing taciturn tough guys and wounded antiheroes. His character, Holland, suffers from an almost cosmic degree of bad luck, which he handles about as gracelessly as possible. He's the kind of gumshoe who accidentally cuts their own wrist while breaking the glass panel on a door, then immediately makes it worse by panicking like a chicken with its head lopped off.

Love, Judd Apatow's new rom-com series now streaming on Netflix, presents an interesting, complex twist on the Nice Guy -- the stock character who uses being nice as a way to passively manipulate women into sex and/or a relationship -- where he's both an archetype and a realistic person.

Gus, played by show co-creator Paul Rust, uses acting nice as a tactic to control his girlfriend Natalie's (Milana Vayntrub) behavior. By acting nice -- buying Omaha Steaks to send to her dad on his birthday and telling her he loves her constantly, for example -- Gus makes Natalie feel like she can't address problems in their relationship because there's nothing wrong on the surface. Consciously or not, he's manipulating Natalie into staying with him.

Gus is a stereotypical Nice Guy: nerdy, not especially good-looking, entitled, and not so good at actually thinking about what other people want or need, even though he thinks he is. He's already in a relationship at the beginning of the show, but he uses being a Nice Guy to prolong that relationship, and it's easy to imagine that Gus Nice-Guy'd his way into the relationship. Sometimes his selfishness manifests in helping others, but he's still selfish. He helps the child actor he tutors cheat on a test in order to save his job, not to protect her. He gets angry and resentful when his kindness is not received how he wants or when people see through his manipulation. And at one point, in a rare moment of honesty, he tells Mickey he's not some nice guy who'll just be friends with her if she's not going to have sex with him. Gus is even called a lowercase "nice guy" in the show's Netflix description, a word choice that seems unlikely to be a coincidence, considering co-creator Lesley Arfin's history as a writer on Season 1 ofGirls and a relationship advice columnist.

Gus is a carefully observed character of a type Rust and Arfin are clearly very familiar with (Arfin has said that much of Gus and Mickey are inspired by her and Rust, who are married in real life). They know how to use the rules of the archetype, but they also know how Gus doesn't fit the archetype. Love knows that Gus isn't actually nice, and he's not supposed to be sympathetic in how he treats Natalie and Mickey. But Natalie and Mickey aren't very nice to him either, with Natalie lying about cheating on him and Mickey's general boundless selfishness. And Gus wants to really love someone, he just doesn't know how yet.

Gus exists on a spectrum. Gus is a work-in-progress. He's clearly not a terrible person. He has his flaws, like his Nice Guy streak and the way he lets his anxiety spiral into insane control freakiness, but he can also be genuinely thoughtful and caring. He's not a bad guy, he's just not the hero he thinks he is. Gus' journey on Love seems to be evolving from a Nice Guy into an actual nice guy, who can be honest about his feelings and treats people well for their sake, not his own selfish motives.

However, when Amelia disappears, the two not-so-nice guys are compelled to work together. While looking for her, they face a world full of bizarre goons, come across dancers that look like mermaids, and unravel a possible far-reaching conspiracy.

When the nice guys visit Kim Bassinger at the district attorney's office, they are actually at another popular filming spot, the John Ferraro Building, formerly known as the LA Department of Water & Power building, located at 111 North Hope Street. Some of the shots are not screen-matched as I am using pictures from a previous visit.

Nice guys tend to finish last in "Virgin River." Look at Ricky, who lost out on his first love, and Preacher, who is the hot glue holding the town together (not to mention Jack's Bar) while never having romantic or personal fulfillment of his own. Will Cameron be another casualty, the steady voice of reason on an unreasonable show? Cameron's sensible words to Mel ("You're going to need someone you can count on . . . You have to think of your future") have mostly been drowned out by Jack's big gestures. But showy displays of romance mean little without day-to-day dependability. Personally, I would trade every fairy-lit Airstream in the world for someone who shows up when they say they will.

Yes and no. Certainly, if it bore too much similarity to the role that I played in Big Bang I wouldn't have done it, but I wasn't thinking consciously what type of character would be a nice way to branch out or show a different side of myself or whatever. This is where it's very specific to Ryan: Ryan is very good at giving performers an opportunity to do things they haven't done before. He particularly enjoys that. He has a talent for seeing ways in which they can do things they haven't done before that they would be able to succeed at. All of that played into my subconscious for sure, and it was certainly refreshing and rejuvenating. I definitely left the project a different person than I had entered it, insofar as... I don't know. It's hard to put a finger on it or even say the right words, but it opened up my vistas, and I see things a little bit differently from having done this project. I probably see myself a little bit differently from having done it. I'm sure I do. Don't ask me in what ways, but I can sense it.

Ten years later, Kerman was engaged to a nice guy and leading a crime-free, yuppie life when the feds appeared at her door to bust her. After making a plea-bargain deal, she was forced to trade in her cushy existence for an orange jumpsuit at a minimum-security prison. 2351a5e196

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