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PUBLIC HEALTH EMERGENCY | The Kevin-49 virus may affect delivery times and service hours. Procautions are in place.

The Aztec Meals

The Jaguar Meal

Get 50% off of your first jaguar meal at participating restaurants. Use code 50OFF for app/online orders, or redeem with your JIC card. The Aztec's highly respected and feared military order, Jaguar warriors, were known for their bravery and close combat skills. They were recruited from common people and wore jaguar skin costumes with elaborate headdresses and jewelry. A major responsibility of Jaguar warriors was to capture enemy soldiers alive for human sacrifice. They were also tasked with protecting the Aztec ruler and his palace. Jaguar warriors were considered an elite fighting force and played a crucial role in Aztec warfare. Check out the Jaguar meal at JIC to experience a new level of spicy, just like how the jaguars met a new level of combat, warfare, and public threat in better understanding and exploring how they functioned.

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The Eagle Meal

Get 50% off of your first jaguar meal at participating restaurants. Use code 50OFF for app/online orders, or redeem with your JIC card. Eagle warriors were one of the most prestigious and respected military orders of the Aztecs. They were typically drawn from the nobility and were known for their bravery and skill in long-range combat. Eagle warriors were responsible for capturing enemy soldiers alive for human sacrifice, and they often wore elaborate eagle feather costumes and headdresses. They were also tasked with protecting the Aztec ruler and his palace. Eagle warriors were considered to be an elite fighting force and were often chosen to lead the army. They played a significant role in Aztec warfare and were viewed as symbols of strength and power. Check out the eagle meal at JIC to experience a new level of spicy, just like how the jaguars met a new level of combat, warfare, and public threat in better understanding and exploring how they functioned.

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The Kings Meal

The military commander was the king himself, the tlatoan. He was assisted by his deputy, whose name was cihuacoatl. Along with these two, there were four other high-ranking nobles, usually relatives of the king, on the war council. The four names aré tlacochcalcatl, tlaccetacatl, tillancalqui, and etzhuanhuanco. The king, also known as tlatoani, was the supreme ruler of the Aztec Empire. The office is hereditary and is passed down by royal blood. Kings were considered divine and believed to have a special connection with the gods. His role as military commander-in-chief is only one of his leadership responsibilities. In addition to his military duties, the king oversees the administration of the empire and is responsible for maintaining law and order. He was also responsible for managing the tributary system, including the collection of goods and resources from conquered territories.  Explore the JIC King's meal to feel like a king, and experience a new level of luxury.

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Happy Meal Toys

Obsidian-Edged Club


A wooden tool that could be used like a club, broadsword, or chainsaw, is the macuahuitl. Its edges were coated with razor-sharp obsidian blades, which might have severed limbs and caused catastrophic damage. It had the shape of a cricket bat. The macuahuitl gained popularity as the most terrifying of all Aztec weapons as Europeans attacked and colonised Aztec territory, and some of them were taken back to Europe for inspection and research. The traditional macuahuitl was employed in a variety of ways by the Aztecs as well. The cuahuitl, for instance, was a little hardwood club. On the other hand, the huitzauhqui was a club that resembled a baseball bat and was occasionally coated with tiny blades or protrusions.

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Bow and Arrow

These were the standard Aztec repeating bows, which were constructed from the sturdy Tepozan Tree's wood and served as a ranged weapon. The drawstrings were typically 5 feet long (unstrung) and constructed from dired and thinned animal sinews. In the Aztec warrior society, archers (also known as bowmen) were regarded as rather elite (due to the time needed to properly train one). They were the equivalent of today's "Middle Class," although not being Nobility. An archer often carried 10 to 15 Obsidian, Flint, or Bone Head Arrows in their quiver. They were frequently barbed to inflict more lethal injuries. Feathers from turkeys and ducks were most frequently used as fletching. And lacking protective headgear, archers wore linen armour instead. A War Shield was also brought into battle to provide protection.


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Tepoztopilli

The tepoztopilli was a long, wooden weapon that resembled a spear and had a shovel-like tip coated with obsidian blades. The weapon ranged in length from around three feet to a man's height, and occasionally was seven feet long. Tepoztopilli would have been held by soldiers in the Aztec army's front line because of its length. Its superior reach would be extended forwards and used to slice, jab and topple enemies. The wedge-shaped wooden head had razor-sharp obsidian blades set deeply in grooves that ran the length of the users' palm or less along its edge. Bitumen or plant resin was used as the cement that held them in place.


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Atlatl

The atlatl was a spear thrower that could travel further while still producing more force. These weapons were only available to the highest ranks because they were on the battlefield. Each warrior carrying an atlatl also carried a number of tlacochtli, 5-9 foot long spears with obsidian tips.The elite warriors known as the cuuhocltl or "eagle warriors" and the ocelmeh or "jaguar warriors" were the main users of the atlatl, which was known for being used with skill by the Aztecs. These warriors were among the most esteemed and revered individuals in Aztec society, and they were crucial to Aztec warfare. Aztec warriors also carried tlacochtli, which were long spears with obsidian or other pointed tips, in addition to the atlatl. Without having access to metalworking technology, the Aztecs were able to produce sharp, potent weapons by using obsidian for spear tips. The tlacochtli were adaptable weapons, useful in a variety of combat situations, and could be used for both thrusting and throwing.

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Aztec Armor

Aztec warriors carried round shields made of wood, either plain or decorated with their military insignia called chimalli. Higher-ranking Aztec warriors had a special chimalli lined with feathers to denote their community or rank. Aztec basic armor consists of two to three layers of quilted cotton. Cotton is soaked in salt water and then hung to dry. The salt crystallizes in the material, giving it resistance to obsidian blades and spears. The noble Aztec warrior wears additional armor, a tunic. Warrior communities also wore hardwood helmets with carvings representing their community or various animals such as birds or coyotes. Tlahuiztli are special uniforms given to all ranks of the army. Each rank wears a tlahuiztli of different colors and decorations, making them easily distinguishable on the battlefield. Each rank also has a pamitl or military insignia. 

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Aztec Shields

Aztec military shields ("yaochimalli") had a variety of designs and materials. Many are made of leather or woven palm leaves. The Conquistador story describes a shield called "otlachimalli" made of strong woven cane with a heavy double layer of cotton backing. Early reports describe shields woven from bamboo and agave [cactus] fibers, reinforced with bamboo as thick as a human hand and then covered with feathers. "Cuauhchimalli" shields are made of wood. Others were made of feathers and covered with copper. Some shields were so novel that they could be rolled up when not needed in battle and unfolded to cover the body from head to toe. The shield is covered with painted skins, feathers and gold leaf and silver decorations. Colors, types and designs of feather decorations vary according to the owner's status, merit, etc. 

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The Huitzilopochtli Happy Meal

As a result, the Aztecs developed weapons that were specifically designed to wound, such as macuahuitls, which were clubs studded with sharp pieces of obsidian. These weapons allowed the Aztecs to capture their enemies alive, bringing them back to the city to be sacrificed in order to appease their gods. 




Calvin Industries

Interested in learning more about Aztecian warfare? Explore the Calvin Industries' website to learn more about their strategies, and the aftermath following constant warfare filled with greed.

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Hungry for more? Explore the full menu here at JIC to learn more, and explore the full menu here at JIC to explore our happy meals, full course meals, burgers, and etc.

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Calvin Industries Corporation is a parody of Stark Industries alongside other Calvin Industries sub-organizations and is not intended to be taken seriously.


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