Another great session with Cohort 82 is in the books!
The focus of this module was on the art of asking powerful questions and how that skill supports meaningful client transformation. One insight that really stood out to me was how this ties into the broader theme of change.
We explored ideas from Robert Kegan, co-author of Immunity to Change. One fascinating takeaway was about how participants in a study didn’t always fully register the exact words of the questions being asked. This finding sheds light on how our neural pathways—what I equate to our automatic, “System 1” responses—can cause us to react to what we think we heard, rather than what was actually said.
This has big implications for communication. Communication is a two-way street: there’s a sender and a receiver. Both have roles in effective communication. If the receiver doesn’t truly hear or understand the question, the outcome can be skewed. As coaches, we are often the senders of questions. If we don’t help our clients fully hear and process what we’re asking, we risk missing the mark. So, it’s not just about asking the right questions—it’s also about how we ask them. A good coach has to be a good listener and observer. After asking the question, we need to be hyper-attentive to how our client responds to the question… Did they hear the question we are asking? If not, do we need to reword the question or reemphasize a portion of the question? Did the answer to the question offer to take the conversation in a different direction? Did it uncover a different priority or concern of the client? Paying attention to the details in the responses will allow the coach to help the client unlock even more, helping to drive towards the transformation the client seeks.
Another theme that resonated with me was the nature of change itself. I’m a firm believer in the idea that the pursuit of progress, not perfection, is what drives real growth. Small, incremental steps—what can be referred to as safe-to-fail experiments—can be incredibly effective. These experiments should be practical, low-risk, and even fun. They’re not meant to solve everything at once, but to gently nudge us forward.
A classmate shared a powerful insight that stuck with me:
“Change is hard, but it’s not complicated.” – John Hall
We also touched on the use of metaphors in coaching. When used thoughtfully, metaphors can create deep resonance and connection. But they must be chosen carefully to ensure they align with the client’s experience and worldview.
This session marked the end of our fifth module—just one more to go! It’s hard to believe how quickly this journey is moving. While the program may be nearing its end, the learning and growth are far from over.
Stay true.