Revised Assignment:
Citation:
Goltz, Fransizka and Sadakata, Makiko "Do you listen to music while studying? A portrait of how people use music to optimize their cognitive performance." Science Direct October 2021 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0001691821001670
Direct Quote:
"Also, while classical, calm, and non-vocal music were indicated as preferred genres when facing challenging tasks, people indicate to be less critical about the type of BGM when engaged in relatively easy tasks. This finding corresponds with previous research demonstrating that instrumental and calm music tend to have the least detrimental effect on cognitive performance" (Goltz and Makiko).
Personal Example Sentence:
If I were writing an informative essay titled "Tips for optimal performance," I could use the above citation in a body paragraph that specifically discusses music as a potential benefit for completing tasks. When it comes to the benefits of using music to complete tasks, the studies show that "instrumental and calm music tend to have the least detrimental effect on cognitive performance (Goltz and Makiko).
Importance of Citations:
One important reason to properly cite your sources is for academic purposes; if a professor can access your source, they can provide you with better feedback or more comprehensively understand your framework when reading your responses. Furthermore, anyone else who reads can easily find the evidence that supports your thesis and can better understand other inferences you may make in your writing.
Reflection
In order to go about making revisions to this assignment, I went back and rewatched the Introduction of MLA video so that I could review the document formatting for an essay and also the guidelines for citations. I also recompleted the online MLA Activity to achieve a higher score, and by taking time to reflect on my understanding of these topics, I was able to strengthen this assignment submission with more ease. When I compared the initial draft to the revised version, I recognized a critical shift in my perspective because of what I have learned. I have grown from viewing a citation as just a mechanical requirement of academic papers to give authors credit and avoid plagiarism to viewing citations as also an opportunity to provide evidence, enhance my writing, and create effective rhetorical strategies. The specific edits I made were the source citation, as I did previously, incorrectly providing Google Scholar's outdated citation. Now the citation properly reflects the MLA guidelines with the two authors shown first, followed by the title, name of website/organization, published date, and finally, the URL link. The most critical revision involved deepening the analysis in the "personal example sentence" and "importance of citations" sections. The original draft provided only a descriptive function for the source to whereas the revisions demonstrate an expanded framework/perspective of why the source is rhetorically adequate, and not just how to insert it. Additionally, when I discussed the importance of citations, I moved beyond surface-level concerns and also addressed the idea of academic integrity with properly giving credit as one way to participate in responsible scholarly conversations.
Revised Assignment:
Introduction: I found the introductory paragraph to be engaging; however, it did not adequately prepare readers for what to expect in the body paragraph. Usually, the thesis is the last sentence or towards the end of a paragraph and is concise in explaining what evidence will be outlined in the following paragraphs that support the claims you are making in your analysis. Grade --> Silver (2 pt)
Conclusion: Personally, I found the last paragraph to be lacking as it did not draw strong connections to the thesis, which was already on the weaker side. I feel the writer failed to connect the analysis to real-world implications and how the messaging in the ad directly relates to marketing strategies and techniques used in propaganda. The writer focused more on personal inferences through a lens of heavy bias and not well enough supported by facts, especially with the utilization of words like "perfect" and "all" because it is an inaccurate exaggeration. Grade --> Bronze (1 pt)
Thesis: When I looked at what claims and evidence were provided in the body paragraphs and how the thesis was reflected on in the conclusion, I feel there could be great improvements. The writer seems to apply her own attributions and attitudes about how most women might feel about their bodies to draw extreme conclusions about the ad. I feel the writer would have conveyed a stronger thesis by focusing on the feeling anyone can draw from seeing the advertisement and highlighting rhetorical strategies like 'beautiful imagery' and/or moods like 'captivating charm.' Grade --> Silver (10 pts)
Focus: She did a great job at following a logical flow as the body paragraphs progressed and she discussed the different rationale behind each on of her claims Grade --> Gold (4 pts)
Evidence: Grade --> Silver (13 pts)
Analysis: Grade --> Silver (13 pts)
Writing Fluency: Grade --> Gold (5 pts)
Grammar & Spelling: Grade --> (10 pts)
MLA Format: Grade --> Gold (10 pts)
Overall Grade: C +
Reflection
The revision process significantly improved the depth and precision of my essay grading reflection in comparison to the original draft, which was brief and used less academic language. My revised response includes specific, detailed justifications for the assigned grades in each rhetorical category. I added a separate section for each of the components, specifically expanding upon my advice for the: Introduction, Conclusion, Thesis and Focus, clearly outlining the point value and grade for each category. These additions directly addressed the feedback that my initial attempt had. For example, I changed the justification for the Thesis from vague language to a clear academic critique, noting it "did not adequately prepare readers for what to expect in the body paragraph." Over the course of the semester, my understanding of rhetorical analysis has deepened, moving beyond simple identification of pathos or ethos to a critical evaluation of how well an essay effectively supports its claims with appropriate evidence and logical structure. This revised assignment demonstrates my improved ability to use the rubric as a precise, analytical tool to provide actionable feedback.
Before taking this class, I did not have a clear understanding of the value of rhetorical situation and genre and their effect on an argument. One of the first reading assignments completed, "How We Use Rhetoric in Everyday Life," helped me to create a framework from which to gain value from this course. I approached many of my assignments with a sentiment of "how can I apply this information outside of an English composition course"? By analyzing documents, speeches, and videos, for example, the analysis of the text titled "Cleaning: The Final Feminist Frontier" or clips from the PP presentation on Logical Fallacies, I was able to identify what contributes to a strong or weak argument as well as commonly used strategies like ethos, logos, and pathos. The construction of my Rhetorical Analysis Essay also enhanced my knowledge of rhetoric, especially because I chose a political text/speech with such powerful use of imagery and emotion. Since there was no audio evidence or replications of this speech, I was forced to meticulously analyze my author's rhetoric on paper and imagine how this would have impacted her audience. Additionally, I used concepts related to rhetorical situation and genre and applied them when writing my Literary Analysis Essay as well, because it was helpful to me in developing a well-thought-out thesis.
I am grateful that the format of this class greatly encouraged collaboration among students, solidifying my understanding of writing as a social act: The first assignment, the group marketing presentation, was an excellent, hands-on example of this course outcome. My peers and I, functioning as a temporary discourse community, collaborated on the composition of a presentation to share the perceived benefits and impact our product could have on a community. This required us to negotiate meaning, combine diverse perspectives into a single voice, and tailor our language to persuade a specific audience. Furthermore, the collaborative nature extended beyond our group as we watched and participated in sharing feedback on the other groups' presentations, learning to evaluate different rhetorical strategies within our classroom community.
The analysis of short, impactful poems like "In a Station of the Metro" and the discussion of contemporary texts from Taco Bell Quarterly also provided a powerful opportunity for this course outcome. By analyzing the poetic composition together, the class was able to make diverse and worldly connections. This showed me that reading and interpreting are inherently social acts; our shared understanding evolved as we brought in local, national, and international contexts to interpret the texts. Our reading assignments, specifically the article "OER Part 3: Strategies for Peer Reviewing," helped solidify my academic understanding of this concept by providing the necessary vocabulary to discuss composition within a community. Lastly, participating in the first peer review for the literary analysis essay was arguably the most practical application. It helped me to refine my outline and provided an invaluable outside perspective on how my own writing is understood by others, underscoring the fact that the meaning of a text is co-created between the writer and their audience. This experience affirmed that composing is not a solitary endeavor but a dynamic engagement with a community of readers.
This outcome was the most transformative for my overall approach to composition. Before this class, I often treated writing as a single-stage task, a confident first draft followed by a quick proofreading. Resources like the MLA Style Guide in addition to sections from the textbook like OER Part 3, "Writing thesis statements," and OER Part 1 "Moving Beyond 5 Paragraphs," were extremely helpful tools. These developed my understanding of effective writing, which should be approached in multi-stages with skilled deliberation. The process began with planning and researching, where I used various technologies to gather information for the research paper. The requirement to use prewriting techniques, such as formal outlining and mapping ideas, ensured my first drafts were structured logically and addressed the prompt directly. Most critically, the emphasis on revising, editing, and incorporating feedback was instrumental. For instance, the peer review sessions allowed for essential collaboration and assessment, providing fresh perspectives that highlighted weak arguments or unclear phrasing in my literary analysis essay. Learning to intentionally separate scholarly revisions (clarity, claims) from local edits (grammar, flow) strengthened my ability to make substantial improvements. This systematic process ensures that whether I am composing a complex legal brief for my Criminology major or a simple professional email, the final product is always polished and rhetorically effective.
Improving my fluency in standardized written American English was a continuous goal. Early in the semester, I often struggled with complex sentence structures, sometimes leading to comma splices or confusing modifier replacements. The Grammar textbook and PowerPoint were things I referred to multiple times throughout the semester and I have bookmarked these resources to return to for academic or professional enhancement in the future. With consistent practice, especially in drafting the literary analysis essay and the final research paper, along with the revisions completed for this portfolio, I was able to better command the dialect at the level of the sentence and the paragraph. Beyond mere technicalities, I gained a deeper appreciation for the second component of this outcome: analyzing and describing the value of incorporating various languages, dialects, and registers in my own and others' texts. For instance, in our class discussions, analyzing how different authors use specific vernacular to establish credibility or connect with a targeted audience or community opened my eyes to the rhetorical power of linguistic choice. This skill is vital for my future in Criminology, where I will need to precisely interpret statements, and the elements discussed in the proofreading video can always be applied. It's essential, I understand and can analyze the intended meaning and social context of various professional and creative documents without bias. I now recognize that proper grammar is not just about following rules; it's about making conscious, strategic choices to ensure clarity.
Evaluating my development as a writer over the course of the semester has been essential to transforming my understanding of composition from a static skill into a dynamic, adaptable process. Initially, I saw reflection simply as summarizing what I had done. Now, I understand it as a critical evaluation of my compositional choices and an opportunity to analyze why certain strategies succeeded or failed. The prompts that required me to articulate how composing in multiple genres and mediums can be applied in other contexts were particularly valuable. For example, the detailed planning and argumentative structure required for the rhetorical analysis outline assignment essay immediately translated into better organization for outlining professional memos required in any higher education course. I learned that the process of revising and editing an essay, involving analyzing audience and purpose, is the same process needed to critique and refine many communication mediums, whether it's a social media post or a complex research report. This increased awareness I have gained of my own writing processes is perhaps the most transferable skill as well as the skills encouraged in the Lateral reading assignment, Reflection guarantees I will always approach future academic and professional tasks with an intention to learn, adapt, and advance my specific goals.
My research approach has fundamentally shifted from viewing it as simply collecting facts to recognizing it as a genuine "means of discovery" or "building a case file" The requirement to use writing and research to examine personal beliefs in the context of multiple perspectives challenged my initial assumptions on several topics, forcing me to grapple with complex twxta and synthesize varying texts I wanted to use as evidence to support my claims. I definitely benefited immensely from completing the Library tutorial. This process taught me to explore focused research questions through various media and technologies, not just academic databases, but also by analyzing video, news media, and publicly available data. Crucially, I gained proficiency in the second part of this outcome: learning to integrate others’ positions and perspectives into my writing ethically. Before this class, I relied heavily on direct quotes; now, I confidently employ paraphrasing, summary, and other literary techniques to seamlessly transition between my own arguments. This skill is paramount for my Criminology major, where the ability to synthesize case law, data, and expert testimony into a cohesive, non-plagiarized analysis is the key to professional competence. The course effectively transformed research from a chore into a tool for intellectual exploration.