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My hijab, myself
My hijab, myself
-Debra J. White
What’s that thing on your head? That thing is called a hijab, also known as a headscarf. Similar to scarves worn around the neck but this one goes on the head. In 2015, I converted to Islam at the age of 61 and started to wear a hijab Many though not all Muslim women cover our heads outside the home as part of our religion. I chose to cover mine. Just as well. It’s gray and a reminder of old age. Reactions to my covered head have been varied, ranging from hysterical to downright rude. Take the lady at the gym who noticed me wearing a green print hijab. I thought I looked rather nice. She asked if I had green hair. I cracked up. I said that’s one I hadn’t heard before. At the same gym, a woman once asked if I was cold. It’s hard to be cold in Phoenix in the summer. You’re all covered up she said, looking at my sweatpants, long sleeved t-shirt and hijab. I said that I wasn’t cold. Rather than be annoyed by such inane comments, I use the chance to educate people. I told her we Muslim women dress modestly as do women in other faiths such as conservative Jews, Catholic nuns, Sikhs and Mennonites. Oh, she responded and walked away. The summer months here are long and scorching hot. When it’s 105 outside, I am sometimes asked if I’m hot. You’re darn right I’m hot. Wearing a hijab and a long-sleeved outfit doesn’t mean I’m any more uncomfortable than the next person. In fact, men and women who work outside in construction or at the airport wear protective clothing to shield them from the intense sun. The long-sleeved outfits protect me from the sun too. But many Muslim women are asked that during the summer. Aren’t you hot? Yes, we’re hot like everyone else. The summer heat is a killer in Phoenix. Who isn’t hot? Moving on, other comments are memorable as well. I volunteer at an airport. One of my colleagues once asked if I had cancer. Cancer, I said with incredulity. I feel fine, even though I have residual mobility and memory problems from a serious car accident in 1994 where I sustained brain trauma. Why do you ask? You cover your head. I rolled my eyes. I’m a Muslim convert and many of us cover our heads out of respect for Allah, the word we use for the Almighty. Oh, she said. An employee once commented on “that rag” on my head. That irked me but I held my cool. I replied that rags are for cleaning. I’m a Muslim convert and we cover our heads. I gave her my usual spiel. She said nothing. Rag on my head. Someone asked me if I slept in the hijab. No, I don’t. I wear pajamas like most everyone else. For me, my hijab has served other purposes. I sometimes use it to wipe away smudges from my eyeglasses when I’m stopped at a red light. I’ve worn eyeglasses for most of my life and I can’t stand driving with stained glasses. Where I live, some cities and towns set up photo radar cameras at intersections to snap your picture if go through the light. Who wants an expensive ticket that remains on your license for three years? I’m so careful to avoid those intersections. When passing through one, I wrap the scarf around my face just to make sure I can’t be recognized if I get stuck behind a slow poke driver and the camera zaps me. That happened once. I don’t want it to happen again.
For us converts, getting the hang of the hijab doesn’t always come easy. It didn’t to me either. I first wore one back in 2013 to an Islamic memorial service. My new Muslim friend Diba told me to cover my head. I had several scarves that I draped around my neck for decorative purposes with certain outfits. A lady always must look sharp, doesn’t she? The one I chose seemed suitable. I arrived at the masjid, also known as a mosque, before my friend Diba did. One of her friends noticed the lopsided scarf on my head. Maybe I looked like I just came out of a wind tunnel. With a slight grin, she approached me and said let me help you. What, I don’t look ok? She said I’ll help you look better. I didn’t argue. I wanted to fit in. I later learned proper hijab etiquette from my new Muslim friends and watching “how to” videos on the internet. I’m still not an expert but I’m better.
The hijab almost got me killed. I sometimes use a motorized scooter outside the house due to the car accident. I lost part of my mobility. Not long after the 2016 election, a yahoo in a pick-up truck noticed me coming out of a grocery store and aimed his truck at me. Yikes, I was scared. Then, he came back again, this time coming within inches of ramming me. Seeing the crowd of shocked on-lookers come to my aid, he sped off. A car accident almost did me in to begin with. I surely didn’t need another one.
Sometimes, the scarf has attracted unwanted attention such as the driver who flipped me a vulgar gesture while at a stop light. I ignored him although the New Yorker in me felt like sticking out my tongue. People sneer at me sometimes while in the library. I live in a somewhat conservative neighborhood in a red state. The haters have a problem, not me. On the other hand, I’ve had strangers tell me I look beautiful when I’m at a café or restaurant. That’s how I feel wearing a headscarf, beautiful. So do my Muslim sisters. They look beautiful too.
A 1994 car accident ended Debra’s career due to a traumatic brain injury. She re-invented herself through volunteer work and writing. Debra wrote for Animal Wellness, Arizona Republic, Social Work, Airports of the World, Psychology Today, and others. She reviewed books, contributed book chapters and wrote a book for TFH Publications. Her website is: www.debrawhite.org
The Idea of Beliefs
The Idea of Beliefs
Ushmil Rimjha
Ushmil Rimjha
"Neuroscience researchers and philosophers have looked upon how people form “beliefs. Jordan Grafman, director of the cognitive neuroscience section at the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke said that neuroscience research suggests that the brain of humans is ‘primed to believe’ (Azar). Belief gives us a sense of meaning in our complex world, it allows us to understand the things we can’t yet or maybe don’t want to. They give us a sense of individualism. Belief is what makes us human, without which no other thing could exist. Even science can itself be thought of as a belief system. With science we make beliefs based on experimentation but which also cannot be completely proven or disproved, for that matter. Our beliefs can change our way of thinking which can often reflect in our reality. One immaculate example of this is The Placebo Effect. The placebo effect is said to be just as effective as traditional medicines in a lot of cases. It can heal (not cure completely) a patient, just that, it does not use any medicine but sugar candies instead. The healing that takes place through this effect can be due to the placebo beliefs. For instance, believes like, “This medicine is going to cure me” or “this medicine has been proven to treat patients for years, I will also get healed” (LUNDH Placebo, belief, and HEALTH. A cognitive–emotion model). This placebo effect produces responses of hope and calm which also might relieve the patient of any stress or anxiety. This placebo effect work on symptoms modulated by the brain. (The power of the placebo effect). Jeremy W. Hayward, an author and a physicist, defined our way of thinking and believing as:
“To a very large extent men and women are a product of how they define themselves. As a result of innate ideas and the intimate influences of the culture and environment we grow in, we come to have beliefs about the nature of being human. These beliefs penetrate to a very deep level of our psychosomatic systems, our minds and our brains, our nervous systems, our endocrine systems, and even our blood and sinews. We act, speak, think according to these deeply held beliefs and belief systems.” (Newberg and Waldman 19)
A belief often starts with an assumption which leads to different truths and conclusions. If we didn’t trust our beliefs we would be shadowed in doubt, the amount of stress hormones our brain would secrete in such scenarios is utterly devastating to our brain. (Newberg and Waldman 38) Coming to the dark side of beliefs, commonly The Nocebo effect, it is quite shocking how belief can play a negative role.
In 1993, research examined the death of a few Chinese Americans. It was found that Chinese Americans (but not whites) die earlier if they have a combination of disease and birth year which Chinese astrology and medicine consider ill-fated. (Phillips et al.)
While the research seems quite old today, recently, in Iran, about 700 people were killed because of the false belief that toxic methanol can cure Coronavirus (or covid-19). (8News)
It is widely known that the Antisemitism beliefs and ideas of Adolf Hitler killed millions of people. Even some religious views about vaccination (belief like since the body is scared, it should not be injected with chemicals or blood from outside) have also led people to avert from the ideas of vaccination which could help in initiating herd immunity. In 2020, Some people were burning towers in Britain because they believed that the 5G towers installed were the main driving force behind the Coronavirus pandemic. It also led to abusement of some telecom engineers. (Ap Conspiracy theorists burn 5G towers CLAIMING link to coronavirus). It is thus obvious from the above-mentioned sources that beliefs can give healing and life, but false beliefs can also cause death and turmoil.
Anti Waxers
Anti Waxers
Shanaya Engineer
Shanaya Engineer
"The pandemic was an eye-opener to the world where we found out how some people are not staunch believers of Darwin’s theory of ‘survival of the fittest.’ We came across campaigns held in the western and supposedly ‘modern’ country, where people were proudly calling themselves, Anti-Waxers. These are the people who refuse all forms of vaccinations because they wish to keep their bodies pure and uncontaminated. I too am a part of a moment like this. Don't worry, I believe in vaccines! What I do not believe, however, is in the concept of Waxing!
We are the proud women born in the 21st century who have all the modern beautification products available at their disposal which can help get rid of hair from places on our bodies we cannot even name! Yet, I refuse to fall prey to this propaganda. How can trying to look ‘beautiful’ only be accomplished from raw pain? Pouring the hot wax on your skin directly, applying strips on them and pulling them faster than the speed of lightning, actually sounds like a torture program announced to punish criminals in ancient Greece.
Women are brainwashed into thinking that the less hair they have on their bodies the more beautiful they look. Apparently, the trend of waxing can be traced back to the ancient Egyptians who thought that walking out in public with arm hair was a sign of disgrace. Isn't it shocking? How throughout history, women have been subjected to come up with ways to lose everything on their body, whereas the other gender is free to do as they please? Be it body hair, body fat, curves, lines, crooked teeth, or excess clothes, everything are better off of a woman’s body!
If true beauty comes from having smooth skin, then all women would be saints. But, that isn't the truth, is it? At the end of the end, the only thing worth being called beautiful is a person’s behavior and nature. To look beautiful from the outside, you do not need to undergo painful and expensive procedures. Every woman should have a right to make the call herself and not feel burdened by terms such as ‘femininity’. Body hair is natural and to treat it as it is something hideous is absolute stupidity. If Anti-Vaxxers refuse to inject something in them (which they should not), I reject to shave off something from my body!
Women who enjoy waxing and the ones who do not are the same. They both are doing something they both have decided for themselves. It is, after all, their choice! If waxing is an act of bravery, so is the defiance to participate in this culture. Going against traditions is never easy. Do not shame people for having hair, and do not tell them to shave it off either. Real beauty, my friend, does not come from evenly shaped eyebrows, it comes from the two buttons below them. Your eyes, your words, and your gestures, matter. If you are an Anti-Waxer, be proud of yourself, be free of the stereotypes and most important, be Bold!
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