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So you're grieving...
So you're grieving...
We live in a natural world where we are constantly surrounded by gifts made specifically to guide us through the thresholds we are standing in this very moment. I work as a community herbalist, creating tailored remedies to support people’s minds and bodies using the medicine found in plants we often see in our own backyards. My first herbal and spiritual mentor, Kifu Faruq, taught me that plants grow in our yards when we need them most - pay attention to what is popping up in your yard (weeds and all) and get curious, learn about them, consider incorporating their medicine into your routine to see what happens.
Two herbal remedies that I have been exploring and learning the intense power of are common violet and mimosa. Both of these plants can support and guide us through periods of intense grief. These plants are categorized as ‘aggressive’ and ‘invasive’, respectively, throughout North America, making them an abundant resource that can be heavily harvested for our individual needs without concerns of negatively impacting our environment.
The mimosa tree is a powerful option for grief-tending. This shape-shifting, all-around grief catcher most often alleviates the sense of brain fog, exhaustion, and sad numbness that can be characteristic of early and recurrent moments of grief. The most readily available option is to collect the flowers when they bloom in spring, which I prefer to use to make infusions (flowers soaked in boiled water and soak for 12 hours) or flower essence (flowers soaked in room temperature water sitting in bright, direct sun for 8-12 hours). The bark is also very dense in medicinal compounds, which are most effectively drawn out in alcohol, honey, vinegar, or a combination of these.
Common violet leaves are a go-to for grief that shows up as rage. This plant will help to soothe and soften your rage back into the sadness that is truly underneath, but feeling hard to access and needing protection. My favorite way to access this remedy is to collect it from my yard and use the fresh leaves to make an infusion. Go ahead and dry some of those fresh leaves to keep for the winter months, when you can do another infusion with the dried leaves, using less volume of leaves. Almost any plant can be turned into medicine with any number of mediums - what you put the medicine into. For example, Alcohol tincture, honey infusion, and flower essence are slightly different in the way they deliver the medicine and store in your kitchen, but they are all effective.
I believe the act of finding these plants around you, collecting them, and preparing the remedy yourself is a powerful part of the healing process. Sure, the medicine works well on its own, but it's the process of tending to and learning the plant in an embodied way that brings the medicine more fully into your life. Through this process, one is spending time outside, breathing fresh air, hopefully moving slowly and with intention, creating its own ritual of contemplation and demonstrating a mutual respect for oneself and the world we live in. I strongly encourage people to make the time for these extra steps; the impact is very much worth the effort. When not possible, these remedies and other grief-supporting herbs can be purchased pre-prepared from local community herbalists like myself and others.
Serving the Triangle and Triad regions of North Carolina
Email: bella.ciao.doula@gmail.com
Instagram: @birthdeathdoula
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