Thoughts

Have you ever wondered why we do the things we do? 

Have you done things simply for the joy of doing it?

Are we intentionally/unintentionally hurting people? 

Do you follow the crowd behavior without thinking for yourself?

Do you find yourself in the rat race of achieving things that once you do not matter at the end of your life?  Are you tangled in the web of life?

Were you surrounded by critical people who were transmitting their own past hurts to you? Are you also transmitting those hurts to people? What did you do to break the chain of hurt?

Have you taken a probe into your humanity? When you see hatred/gossip/blame games/disrespect around you, is it hard to be kind?  Have you felt that even if it is hard, kindness is worth pursuing?

In a situation where kind behavior is penalized and you have to hear hurtful comments for showing understanding, what will you do? Sometimes, understanding and appreciating someone's goodness can feel pulverizing, as it may backfire. So, do you retreat into your cocoon, hardening yourself against the world? Or do you soften like liquid, allowing the world to pass through you? 

When you witness an act of kindness/understanding, how do you feel?  

Sometimes making the effort to understand each other or to think positively might be hard for some given their life circumstances. Have you pondered on the privileges that you have/do not have?

We all die one day. What do we take with us and what do we leave back to nature? 

Some good resources to probe our own humanity that I found useful (in no particular order):


On bungee jumping

Oh, bungee jumping - what is it about you that you have this vivid memory!

You go in some sort of gypsy van climbing the mountain to the bungee jumping office. You are briefed. You smile with a grin 'Bring it on!'. You are then asked to do a small hike to the bungee platform. Alone and humming a tune, you walk to the bungee platform. The cantilevered platform is painted bright yellow making it easy to spot. You roll up your sleeves and get excited. The platform looks sheltered till the end (or is it?).

You look down and think 'Oh, this is easy, they should have made the platform even higher.' You excitedly don the safety gear. You remember the dive first principle that can make the jumping easier. You start to rehearse it in your mind. You are calm. Cheerful instructors are guiding you, engaging in pep talk. You smile widely. Waddling like a penguin due to the safety gear, you reach the end.

'Ohhhh...my!!!!', you exclaim as the sheltered platform gives way to an unsheltered protrusion. With no roof above your head, standing on the protruding edge of the cantilevered platform, your brain finally fathoms the reality. They tell you not to look down and you do it anyway (well, not to blame us, right!). Birds fly out of your head. An intense fear grips you screaming 'Are you crazy? What are you doing? Don't jump'. You are blank. Is there a word for intensely blank – you are that. There is no dive first principle now. You hear vaguely your instructor saying ‘One…’.

Everything fades and you jump (mind you, they don’t push you). Your body does not like the jump. It feels uncomfortable. And the bungee cord halts. Your worst fear comes into picture: ‘Is there something wrong with the cord? Will I come out alive?’ You feel so helpless and tied, unable to move. You feel your weight being taken up by one of your arms as you are hanging sideways. You decide to let go. You think it is okay if there is something wrong with the cord too.

A complete surrender. Time stood still for what felt like an eternity. Then the cord started doing some gymnastics, twisting and turning you. You are like ‘Damn, you were still just a moment ago!’. Then the cord started slowly moving down and you could see two people down lifting a long stick for you to hold on. You try to catch it. After a few attempts, you hold it and they bring you down. They make you lie down and give you water.

Your brain is like, 'What just happened?'. You are then asked to hike back the mountain to the office. They had some ‘Supergirl’ song bellowing from speakers tied to the mountain trees. You pretend it's your theme song (what is the harm, right?). As you hike above, you think ‘I am so glad I jumped!’. And now you have a wide grin, unlike the earlier sheepish grin, this one was a nod to the mental growth you just gained from those few intense minutes!


Of milkweeds and teardrops

A solitary milkweed floated atop the vibrant Frangipani tree. Dark clouds loomed overhead. She was lost in her thoughts. Before the first raindrop landed, a tear fell onto her dress. She clutched her hands tightly around the fabric. And then the rain poured heavily, as did her tears. The rain subsided. Soft woolen clouds filled the air, diffusing the scent of petrichor. She smiled. It seemed the storm within her had shattered away like shards of glass. 


Shards of glass

She picked the glass shards of her being from her past;

Some were sharp and hurt her deeply,

Some were gentle,

Some were stained with beautiful colors,

She kept them one by one safely in the chest of memories;

Sometimes, those shards blow out of the chest,

She trembled to keep them back again,

It hurts her to do that;

Sometimes, she wonders whether she can stitch those glass pieces together

into some beautiful piece of artwork

glued together by her tears and smiles;

She wonders if she would still tremble 

when she sees them, whole and glued together