Urvashi

Sania: Lata, you will not believe what just happened!

Lata: What is it, Sania? It’s 3 am.

Sania: You have to listen to this! Urvashi came to visit Arjuna!

Lata: What? You mean Urvashi the apsara? Why did she visit Arjuna so late?

Sania: Let me tell you the entire story.

Lata: How long is this going to take? You know I have to get up early to go to the market.

Sania: This is some scalding tea! You have to listen!

Lata: Fine.

Sania: It was around midnight. Arjuna was resting in the foyer, reading late at night like he always does, and I was about to bring him his nightly tea. But then someone came to the door.

Lata: Someone at the door? At 12 am?

Sania: I know, right. Apparently, it was Urvashi, and she looked gorgeous. At first, I thought it was just her natural, radiant beauty. But then, I noticed her hips looked a little wider than normal, and her boobs had grown three sizes.

Lata: Three?!

Sania: Yes, girl! She was wearing padding plus a push-up bra!

Lata: NO!

Sania: YES! Don’t get me wrong she has a beautiful figure, but you could tell she was overdoing it. She was also swaying a lot more than usual that night. If you ask me, she may have had a little too much to drink. Anyway, because of the alcohol, I figured she just wanted a place to chill for the evening. Turns out she wanted to Netflix and chill if you know what I mean.

Lata: SHE SAID WHAT?!? A woman of her status would never!

Sania: See, that’s what I thought too. She said, “Oh thou of fairest complexion, oh thou of deepest eyes, oh thou of…"

Lata: Okay! I get it.

Sania: “OH GREAT HERO! Indra, your father, sent me to be your lovely woman. I was struck with love for you, and it is my only wish to serve you!"

Lata: His father sent her? It must be a trick. Indra never sends apsaras for a good reason. But then again, it’s never the apsara begging for love either.

Sania: I know. It’s confusing but wait. That’s not even the worst part! Before she even started, Arjuna, being the good respectful man he is, welcomed her and spoke to her respectfully, like a man would to his elder…

Lata: Are you trying to say…?

Sania: After Urvashi confessed her love, Arjuna basically said, “I can’t date you, woman! You’re like my great great…..great grandma!"

Lata: NOOOOO! HE DIDN’T SAY THAT. Is that really true?!?

Sania: Bro, yes he did! He’s not lying either. Urvashi married Pururavas, and they are the early ancestors of the Pandavas.

Lata: No kidding? She looks great for her age.

Sania: Right?!

Lata: Wow! I feel so sorry and embarrassed for her.

Sania: Yeah, I felt that way at first too. But don’t worry, she got her revenge...

Lata: What did she do?!

Sania: Oh, but didn’t you have to wake up early to go to the market tomorrow? 😉 I can just tell you later…

Lata: NO! You have to finish the story! I’m awake now!

Sania: Okay! Calm down. So, after he denied her, she scrunched up her lips, balled up her fist, and shouted at him.

Lata: What did she say?

Sania: She said, “I came here because I fell in love with you and because your father sent me as a gift for you! If you will push me away like this, then you will be cursed so that every woman will push you away too as a crusty dusty eunuch!"

Lata: NOOOOO! SHE CHOPPED OFF HIS…

Sania: Essentially, yeah. He will never be loved ever again.

Lata: OH MY GOSH! WAIT! WHAT?!?! THIS IS ACTUALLY LIFE CHANGING!!! LIKE WHAT?!? NEVER AGAIN?!?!

Sania: Well, I kind of lied.

Lata: WHAT?!?!

Sania: Well, of course after all of this happened, Arjuna was terrified, so he sought out Indra for help. I didn’t go with him, but I heard all of this later on from Arjuna’s bodyguards. They said Indra told him everything would be fine and that the curse would only last a year.

Lata: Oh, that’s nice. It’s gonna be one terrible year for Arjuna. If his temper ever gets to be too much, call me, and I can take over a few shifts for you.

Sania: It should be okay. Indra also said that this curse would actually be beneficial in the near future.

Lata: When is becoming a eunuch ever beneficial? What’s happening in the near future?

Sania: Girl, I wish I knew. But if it requires much more work for me, he might have to find a new maid.

Lata: Hahaha. You’ll have to find another job, and Urvashi will have to find another man. Even though she cursed him, I still feel sorry for her. Arjuna at least had his dad to talk to, but who does Urvashi have to comfort her? Ah, the life of an apsara. It must be a lonely one.

Sania: I guess it must be, but I’d take her ageless beauty any day.

Author's Note:

I wrote the story of Urvashi and Arjuna in the style of two girls gossiping. Sania is one of Arjuna’s maids, and Lata is her best friend. I wanted to write this story this way because all of Lata’s expressions were kind of how I felt when I first read this story. I mean how embarrassing must it have been to be rejected because you are too old.

I changed some things from the real story. Sania and Lata didn’t exist in the real story. Urvashi in the real story did not alter her body to look more attractive, but she did get dressed up and drink a little.

I thought it was interesting how in the real story Indra comforted Arjuna after he was cursed, but we never heard about anyone comforting Urvashi after she was embarrassed and heartbroken. This is one of the few times an apsara isn’t sent to be a bad distraction, but it all ends up going awry. I’m sure Urvashi felt lonely when she had no one to talk to after losing Arjuna in such a mortifying way. Earlier on in her life, she faced a different type of loneliness. When she was with Pururavas, the story has it that she had to leave him and their children because Pururavas broke some agreement. This reminds me of Menaka who also had to lose her lover and her child. It seems like the apsaras are trapped in a cycle of loneliness and disappointment. Maybe things will get better for Tilottama, my next and final apsara.

Bibliography:

Pururavas. Source: Wikipedia.

The Mahabharata by Vyasa. Source: Sacred Texts.

Banner Image: Urvashi cursing Arjuna. Source: Wikimedia.