By Alicia Emily Halls
For Counselling and/or Life coaching call ALEMACSS and Associates @ 310-8979 or 460-4752
A relationship can be identified as the act of being connected with something or someone. In a world where that connection has been redesigned to accommodate virtual contact, the original intent of relationships needs to be examine to ensure that your connections add value to your life.
Working with children I have discovered that Attachment theory has a strong component in a child's relationships and the way we connect and develop relationships as an adult. The onslaught of the virtual world has strongly contributed to the poor relationships and/or lack of genuine connections that fill our lives. These connections provide a safe zone in which we often times engage in unhealthy relationship practices. Psychologists describes attachment as as deep and emotional bond that connects one persons to another across time and space. Children who were not privileged to establish such attachments in their early development, display signs of withdrawal, fear, anger issues, unnatural independence, control issues, unrealistic expectation of others just to name a few. As adults persons who struggle to maintain healthy valuable relationships, may need to examine the developmental underpinnings that influences their behavior.
Therefore your first "Relationship goal should be to to develop a healthy relationship with yourself. Get to know yourself, understand and appreciate your strengths and weaknesses. Develop areas in your life that will enhance your every interaction, while being mindful to managed the areas that can be view as negative. The goal is to work towards becoming a better version of yourself. This initial "relationship goal" may take a life time to achieve, set out to enjoy the journey and be patience with yourself as you learn and share the lessons you have learnt in order to help others.
Remember when you add value to your life you are able to add value to others. Your relationship with others will be free of manipulation, insecurities, unclear boundaries and unrealistic expectations. On the journey to becoming the best version of you, there may be a need to get help. I recommend two things., one is to make it a relationship goal to consistently engage in communication with your creator. You must agree that the one who created you will be the best fit in guiding you, and helping you understand yourself and others.
Also you may require professional counseling and coaching in the area of understanding self and building healthy relationships. ALEMACSS and Associates can help you reach your goal. Feel free to give us to call and set up an appointment, as well as log in for Part 2 of "Relationship Goals".