Paving the road

Change...We all experience it, yet we all have different reactions to it (this year in particularly this year!) For some, it can be a mixed bag of feelings; from excitement, sadness, anxiety, to hopefulness. Change is something we all go through, but it is not a time to just auto-pilot through it. By acknowledging and supporting children through a transition, it helps our children build resilience. The more experience they have working through these challenges, the more confidence and skills they will develop to handle difficult situations in the future.

So how can I help my child prepare for this new adventure?

Here are a few ideas and suggestions:

1. Talk to your child in advance of the changes.

   • Whenever there are transitions, a good rule of thumb is giving children a fair warning, so it's not a surprise to them. By doing so, it will provide the opportunity for your child to work through feelings about the transition.

2. Normalize change

   • Let your child know that change happens to everyone.

   • Remind them that they have faced big changes before. Remind them of their strength and bravery that helped them adapt to new experiences in the past. Ask them to talk about a change they experienced in the past and how they handled it, and what helped.

   • Be sensitive to the natural feelings of anxiety that your child may have about change; we have all been there.

3. Be aware: Ears and Eyes on you!

   • Your child is listening and watching you. They take your cues. If you appear worried, not just with your words but in the tone of your voice or facial expression, your child picks up on this and assumes there is something to be worried about.

   • Talk positively about change... If you are confident about the outcomes of an upcoming change, your child will be positive, too.

4. Reassure your child who might be nervous about making new school friends by pointing out how they have made new friends in the past. Let them know they are great friends to others, and the kids at the new school will see that and want to become friends.

5. Give your child time to work through feelings about the transition.

   • You can ask transition questions such as:

     • 1. • What have you been thinking about your new school?

          • what are you most excited about for your first day of school?

          • What are you worried about?

   • Make a list of your child's concerns, and together try to find answers to the questions.

6. Let them know you're in it together! Make planning for change a joint endeavor.

   • Make a scrapbook together about their school experience and leave room for future memories at their new school!

   • Encourage your child to write letters, cards, or pictures to school staff that they are connected to. Do the same for friends.

   • Develop ways of maintaining connections with peers from the prior school

   • Make a worry box together

     • For additional info on click here: worry boxes

   • Try our District's Inner Explorer Mindfulness Program when you both need to calm yourself or just need to refocus on things. Get access here.

   • Create a back-to-school plan with your child.

7. Assume that there will be bumps in the road along the way throughout the transition. Normalize this with your child and talk about how they would like to handle it ahead of time.

8. Read together

   • Read books about transitioning to a new school with your child. There are so many kid-friendly books that focus on changes.

   • Check out a great book below! The Invisible String

Booklist:

bookroo.com/books/topics/transitions

www.weareteachers.com/14-perfect-picture-books-for-the-first-weeks-of-school/

www.readingrockets.org/booklists/are-you-ready-schools-open

www.scholastic.com/parents/books-and-reading/raise-a-reader-blog/being-new-kid-school-books.html

9. Talk to your supports at the school and identify new supports in the new school. Reach out to your child's school counselors who can help support your child in making a smooth transition.

10. Lastly, remember you as the parent or caregiver are handling changes yourself. Take it one day at a time, take time for yourself along the way, be gentle to yourself, and know that you're doing an amazing job being a parent! Click below for some great inspirational quotes about being a parent!

Please feel free to reach out to me, or the Family Resource Center Coordinators if you need further resources or suggestions.

Take good care!

Marlene DeJesus, LICSW

Social Emotional Learning Director

Agawam Public Schools

mdejesus@agawamed.org

Family Resource Center Coordinators: 413.821.0530 ext. 7653 or info@agawamed.org