A Broke Evangelist

December 15, 2024

Romans 12:14-15

Blessing, Cursing, Rejoicing and Mourning 

“14Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.”

So, like the shark in “Toy Story” who pops up wearing Woody’s hat and declares, “Howdy, howdy, howdy!” I, too, decided it was time for a costume change—or at least a nap. I took a week off to sleep (a revolutionary concept, I know) and to focus on getting my brain and body back in sync. Lately, I’d been running on caffeine, sheer willpower, and the occasional prayer of “Lord, just get me through this day.” Turns out, sleep deprivation isn’t a superpower, just a slow crawl to unproductive zombie living. Who knew?

I’m still tired, of course, because apparently that’s just my personality now. But progress is progress! A bump in my Ozempic dosage came with a free side of lethargy and a sprinkle of random side effects, but the upside? My numbers are finally approaching “normal range.” (Well, normal for me, so I’m not going to get carried away.) Baby steps, though. I’ll take the win.

Speaking of wins, I had an awesome night hanging out with some of my high school friends recently. Picture this: a group of middle-aged teenagers (that’s what we call ourselves because the wrinkles are there, but so is the immaturity) reminiscing about the days when we suffered through disco as a viable replacement for the Beatles. We sat around laughing, shaking our heads at the sheer absurdity of our teen years. I mean, how did we survive a time where the same radio station would go from “American Pie” to “Kung Fu Fighting” in one afternoon? It was an era where you could get emotional whiplash just turning on the radio.

And school? Forget it. Between trying to calculate the radius of a circle in geometry and deciphering “onomatopoeia” in English class, our heads were constantly ready to go “boom!” (catch the joke?) And yet, somehow, we managed to graduate. Last night, we partied so hard reminiscing about those days that we shut down the restaurant… at 9:30 PM. Yes, PM. Don’t judge us—our generation’s theme song now is “Stairlift to Heaven!”

Now, speaking of embarrassing moments, let me take you back to fourth grade. I had this amazing teacher who everyone adored. She was kind, smart, and everything you’d want in an elementary school teacher. Naturally, I felt like I’d won the classroom lottery. But one day, about three weeks into the school year, she asked me a question about the lesson. And me, being the intellectual powerhouse I was, replied with a blank stare and the ever-brilliant answer: “I don’t know.”

What happened next, in my 9-year-old mind, was straight out of a horror movie. Her face turned as red as a fire truck, the room got darker than Bilbo’s room while Gandalf scolded him, and she unleashed a torrent of insults while shaking my desk like she was trying to loosen all my teeth. I could feel the other kids’ stares burning holes into my soul. I was convinced I’d be the first fourth-grader in history to get sent to the electric chair for saying, “I don’t know.”

Fast-forward 56 years, and adult me realizes that most of what I described never happened. Oh yeah, I said, “I don’t know,” and my teacher went off on me, but what really went down was probably her sternly saying, “We don’t say, ‘I don’t know,’ in this classroom. Try your best next time.” It probably lasted all of ten seconds, but my overly dramatic 9-year-old brain decided to turn it into a full-blown Shakespearean tragedy.

Here’s the thing, though: that moment stuck with me. I never said, “I don’t know,” again. Not in her class. Not in any class. I learned that it’s better to give a wrong answer than no answer at all. And wouldn’t you know it, the next time I guessed and was wrong, she didn’t pull out a gun or drop a trap door under my desk. She just smiled and moved on. Lesson learned: you don’t have to be perfect; you just have to try.

And isn’t that what life is all about? Taking risks, making mistakes, and learning as you go. Whether it’s starting a business, going back to school, or writing that blog post nobody asked for, you’ve got to step out in faith. It’s not about being flawless; it’s about being fearless—or at least pretending to be.

So, go out there and embarrass yourself a little. It builds character. And while you’re at it, take a peek at these 

solid guides on living in harmony with others—especially when they snicker at you from the back row—from Romans 12:14-15.

Romans 12:14 - Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.

So lets talk about the word, “bless.” What is the context in which this means? In this case it means to confer happiness or even prosperity upon someone. I know it sounds like pulling teeth when it comes to being nice to someone who gives us grief because they’ve waited too long for a coffee, but it doesn’t mean that we have to pronounce blessings over them or make the sign of the cross in front of them, or even wave a crucifix so as to conduct an exorcism, but we can just do one thing: be nice or even make nice for those who are giving us an attitude. Because, if we’re honest with ourselves, most of the people who aren’t nice to us are usually those having a bad day, and not recently escaped from San Quenton.

Let’s be honest—this is one of those verses that makes us go, “Really, God? Are we sure about this?” Because when someone cuts us off in traffic, spills coffee on our favorite shirt, or “accidentally” eats the last slice of pizza we’ve been dreaming about all day, our first instinct is probably not, “I’m going to bless you right now.” No, it’s more like, “I hope you step on a nail on your way out to the parking lot.” But this verse is a game-changer. It’s calling us to flip the script, to trade in our anger and frustration for kindness and grace. We use their negativity as an opportunity to show love, which is way more powerful (and frankly, confusing for the other person). Imagine their reaction when instead of snapping back, they get a response of: “You know what? I hope you have the BEST day!” They’ll be so stunned, they might drop their latte.

Of course, it’s about as easy to do as trying to fold a fitted sheet—it’s awkward, confusing, and makes you question all your life choices. But the beauty is in the effort. Each time we choose to bless instead of curse, we’re building a stronger, more compassionate version of yourself. Plus, it’s fun to see someone’s face when they were expecting a fight, and they get hit with kindness instead. Best part about this is that blessing others doesn’t just help them—it helps us. Holding onto anger or frustration is like drinking sour milk; it does nothing good for us, especially inside. But when we let it go and respond with grace, it’s like clearing out emotional clutter. Suddenly, we have more room for joy, peace, and all the good stuff that really matters. So, next time someone tests us—whether it’s a coworker, a family member, or that one person who always has to comment negatively on our social media posts—let’s take a deep breath, channel our inner kindness, and bless them. Who knows? We might just turn their day around. And if we’re lucky, maybe they’ll even save us a slice of pizza next time.

Romans 12:15 - Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.

Another way to look at this is by calling it the “do as in Rome” strategy. It’s about being the emotional chameleon of the friend group, but in a good way, not the weird lizard way. When a friend gets a promotion, lands their dream job, or even just manages to parallel park perfectly without hitting the curb (a true miracle for some), our job is to throw on a party hat, grab some confetti, and whoop it up with them. Even if we haven’t parallel parked successfully since 1997, it’s not about us. It’s about being genuinely happy for them, even if their victory is as small as finding a five-dollar bill in a pocket on a laundry day. On the flip side, when someone’s struggling—whether it’s losing a loved one, dealing with heartbreak, or just realizing their favorite taco truck is permanently closed—we don’t barge in with, “Hey, look on the bright side!” You sit with them in their sadness. You hand them tissues. You nod solemnly and say, “That taco truck really was the best.”

My one church ministry talent is as a worship leader, primarily in fill-in roles at various churches or leading small groups of believers during retreats. I plug away on my guitar, hoping the flow of the Spirit meets the needs of each gathering. One particular Sunday, I was ministering at a church where my friend was the pastor. That morning, I learned that a friend of his was bringing his family to the service for prayer and healing. Tragically, this man’s teenage daughter, who had given birth to a child just weeks earlier, had passed away unexpectedly. Her parents were now faced with raising her infant baby as their own.

The night before the service, I had carefully planned my music, filling the playlist with “happy, happy, joy, joy” songs—uplifting, hand-clapping tunes designed to inspire a spirit of worship and celebration. It was going to be a great Sunday! But when I arrived that morning and learned what had happened, I immediately called an audible. I set aside the upbeat music and selected songs more appropriate for the somber occasion, focusing on those that could bring comfort and peace to the hearts of those who were hurting.

I mourned with them, though I didn’t know them personally, through my music.

The good news is that when it comes to rejoicing or mourning, we don’t have to do it perfectly. We don’t need to bring balloons, nor do we need to dress in black and stop at Costco on the way to buy a pallet of Kleenex. All we need is a heart that’s willing to show up. Rejoice when they’re up. Sit with them when they’re down. And if all else fails (especially if I need company), bring snacks. Snacks make everything better—whether it’s a celebration, a pity party, or any other reason.

Life’s ups and downs are easier to handle when we have empathy for what people are going through and take the time to understand their situation from their perspective. Let’s work on making the world better for others and see how much better our own lives become.

More to come…

A Broke Evangelist – December 15, 2024

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