Before we started the project, we did exercises to learn how to shade and create value in multiple mediums, but more so colored pencils. We made different value bars per medium and learned shading by drawing different forms like cylinders, spheres, and cubes; and a curling ribbon. We also did a small trompe l'oeil drawing before starting the final still life project. While I already use realism regularly, the exercises helped and refreshed my knowledge and skills.

My still life only includes one object, a 3D wooden dinosaur puzzle. I love dinosaurs, especially Sauropods, and thought it would be extremely interesting to draw, however challenging. As I’ve already taken Drawing & Painting before, I’ve been trying to push myself and do more advanced work in the class. I typically always draw Sauropods facing left and would have switched it around for the project, but that half had many broken “vertebrae” that had been snapped which I didn’t want to draw.

I am extremely proud of the shading and dimensionality I was able to create in this drawing. I started off using alcohol markers as my medium, but my main color completely dried out, and a replacement would be too expensive and take too long to arrive. I was originally not going to use colored pencils as I thought it would be too difficult with the intricacies of the subject matter, and how large I chose to make the artwork, but it ended up working in my favor and turned out better than markers ever would have. I have shadows and highlights throughout the piece that show depth and bring it to life.

Nearing the end of the drawing, I was having some trouble. My teacher told me to add more cast shadows on the neck from the vertebrae, and the lighting of the shadow onto the ground of my drawing. Without the help I don’t think it would look as realistic with the lack of depth shown on the neck, and on the ground. 

After refreshing my knowledge on linear perspective, I felt more confident and prepared for this project. I practiced with multiple linear perspective activities and even a drawing of the classroom before working on the final artwork. I fulfilled the requirements as there are over 50 orthogonal lines; excellent shading, colors, and value; detail; and use of my time and materials.                                                                                              I was originally going to use 1-point linear perspective for my drawing, but 2-point perspective can show more depth and gives me more freedom in what I want my subject matter to be. I had a hard time coming up with a concept, especially as I had already done this project when I had previously taken the class. I knew I wanted to include dinosaurs in some way, but couldn’t decide on an environment. When looking for inspiration, I saw a lot of train tracks in 1-point perspective, and wanted to work based off that; a train hauling dinosaurs. I was going to have more than just one, but a real train would not be capable of carrying that much weight, and I didn’t have the time.

I was hoping to strictly use markers on this project, as it fell through in my last attempt; but I had to go back in with colored pencils like previously. However, I do think the pencils added a level of detail I would not have been able to achieve with alcohol markers alone. The drawing was going to be longer, showing more train cars and a car driving on the road, but with the time I had left and my own ability, I knew I had to trim the paper. My teacher helped me put the cross sign into perspective in relation to the size of the train, and my peers helped me on adding more highlights.

The most challenging part of the project was the markers drying out after repeated use, making for some odd blending in some parts of the drawing. I enjoyed watching it come together in the end and being really surprised with how it came out.

I wanted to influence my art from the work of British painter, Jenny Saville. She is known for large oil paintings of nude obese women-- informed by feminist issues and gender studies. Interested in the “imperfections” of flesh; she observed a plastic surgeon, cadavers, and explored medical pathologies. Saville’s art is typically realistic large oil portraits, consisting of: earthy colors-- mostly cool toned, that show realistic bodies. She somewhat stylizes it to make it contrasting and unique, with contorting fat rolls. Saville wants to bring attention to “under-represented” bodies.

She starts with a punchy nature colored base, and builds up layers with the skin tone in sections. Starting with large, broad strokes, she later refines facial features.

I started with a vibrant, punchy green background, and a bright red underpainting. I built up my skin tone, and then refined my whole face before working on the rest in sections. My whole painting is a little more refined than I would have originally wanted to be more similar to Saville’s style, but otherwise I think I captured it well. I especially think I captured her type of content. I’m showing a lot of skin, specifically regarding being trans. If this wasn’t for a school project, I may have removed my shirt entirely and shown more fat rolls in my torso. I do love how the shirt came out, though. I tried my best to stay true to her methods of work, but Saville herself works against her system.

The meaning of my artwork is to show the graphic struggles of gender dysphoria. Tearing off my chest is a last resort measure out of hatred and mental pain. It’s guttural and aggressive. It also shows intrusive thoughts and impulsive actions.

I dread looking at my body, as it doesn’t look or feel like mine. I physically feel trapped and suffocated. As a child and into my teens; I would only wear dark, baggy clothes. It was the only way I was able to minimize my discomfort and get closer to expressing and accepting myself. I always outwardly hated my appearance, and would continuously cry to my parents as I got older. Since then, I have been binding my chest for five years, and am actively working toward receiving top surgery. Gender affirming care is life saving. I have become suicidal due to my dysphoria, and others have attempted at home surgery. 

I am extremely proud of how this painting came out. I never expected for it to turn out so well, and I am super impressed. My art skills are exceedingly improving. I think the proportions look great-- besides maybe the arms due to foreshortening. I love the shading and colors. I exaggerated the shadows and highlights, which I think compliment the style well. The shadows are very blue, and much darker than my original photograph. My face and shirt I think I did very well, but I would like to improve the left hand. 

My criteria included: varying value, not making the painting too refined, and being expressive. I achieved the varying value. I would say it is more rendered than I originally would have liked, but I do think it still works in Saville’s style. I definitely succeeded in making it expressive, and I think my artwork would evoke strong feelings in viewers.

I didn’t receive much feedback from my teacher or my peers during the project. My teacher did suggest I look into the work of Jenny Saville, as I didn’t want to sway from my previous choice when I had originally taken the class, Lucian Frued. The only thing I really changed while working was darkening the upper lip, which was suggested by my teacher. Otherwise, she said I was doing a good job on my own. I appreciated the critique, and immediately instituted it. I’d say I used my time very well. I have been much better with my time management skills this year, and finished the project on time. I took my painting home for a couple days to refine what I couldn’t in my short class period. I could have used my outside class time more wisely, as I brought it home for the weekend and didn’t really work on it until the night before it was due instead of taking advantage of the extra time I had. 

I knew I wanted to incorporate a dinosaur into my landscape, so I had to choose a subject that felt accurate to the time period or realistic for a dinosaur to be in. While I could have had a dinosaur in the present, I wanted to get better at recognizing and executing prehistoric landscapes for my future career. My chosen photograph pictured grass, but I changed it in my painting to be more sandy or rocky to be more accurate, as grass didn’t exist in the Jurassic.

The Brachiosaurus is in the foreground, the water in the middle ground, and the trees in the background. My teacher recommended I make the sand in the background duller and lighter to add depth, which I think really helped my painting. I initially had some trouble painting the water, but after some experimenting I managed to create an excellent water texture that I am proud of. I also had a lot of issues with the trees. I’ve never really painted a landscape before so this was all very new and difficult for me. After taking my project home to work on during the weekend with my own supplies, I successfully created a tree texture. I also textured the sand and started painting in the Brachiosaurus. I painted it last because I wanted to make it look like it was actually interacting with the environment, and because I knew if I had sketched it previously before I finished painting, I would have been too cautious. I didn’t want to worry about accidentally painting over it.

While working on this project I watered down a lot of my paint. I find it easier to work with thinner paint as that is what I am most used to. I did most of the painting with a small flat brush, but used a fan brush for the trees and part of the sand in the foreground. I used an even smaller flat brush for the Brachiosaurus. I learned that my brush shape and size play a really big part in painting. I typically only use one small brush for the majority of my work, which made achieving some textures in this project difficult.