RUTH ROBERTA WHAM - LATER WHAM-SECOR MEMORIES
Editorial note: Ruth Roberta Wham Secor (the "I" in the text) wrote this letter in 1989 to Thomas J. Wham (the "you" in the text) for his genealogical project. Glenn Alan Secor, Ruth’s son and Tom’s cousin, converted it to electronic text in 2000. Glenn added footnotes, titles and bracketed text [thus] to clarify references, and made minor typographical corrections.
Tommy:
You have asked me to write something concerning the accomplishments of the adult members of our family. Before I do so, let me say that at my age, I consider "just living" is perhaps our greatest challenge. However, I know that is not what you are speaking to so I will try to shed some light on other accomplishments of the group.
[Her brothers, Paul and Ray, and sisters Mary and Muriel. I (Glenn Secor) knew all these people, especially Uncles Paul and Ray, and Aunt Mary. I have nothing but pleasant memories of any of them. They are/were all very special people.]
When you consider such matters, I believe you must weigh the accomplishment against the particular individual's education and background. For instance, your Uncle Paul, who went through the third grade in Oklahoma eventually became Assistant Liquor Control Chief for the State Board of Equalization. While it is true that he did not have to qualify by Civil Service examination for the position, nonetheless, he had to do the work involved which involved masses of paper work, etc. (He was "blanketed in" by popular vote in l934 when the liquor portion of the Board of Equalization was established following the repeal of the 18th Amendment.) He did have to qualify by Federal examination for Prohibition Officer which was no small task for a man with such a limited formal education. I was not around but I know he must have studied hard to pass it. I truly believe him to be a glorious example of a self-made man. I might add that this is a disappearing breed as now academic achievement is the "in thing." Sad, too.
Your own father surely is another example of a person with poor beginnings who rose to the top. I am sure that you know more about his story than I do, but I’ve always been very proud of him. I recall that I was just beginning to work in Santa Rosa when the picture of him accepting the job of Associate Warden at San Quentin came out in the paper. Boy, was I ever pleased and proud to tell my fellow workers "That's my brother!" He, too, climbed to the top through study, discipline, and guts!
I began my service with the State of California in the Bureau of Criminal Identification as a Junior Typist Clerk at $80.00 a month. I suspect I was better qualified for the job than either Paul or Ray only because I was fresh out of high school where I had taken commercial courses. I was really very proud, however, that I had placed No. 5 on the statewide Junior Typist Clerk examination for literally thousands of people had competed. I remember feeling very privileged to be a State employee. I used to look up at the inscription above the entrance "BRING ME MEN TO MATCH MY MOUNTAINS" with pride, thinking to myself "I'm one of them." To say I did my level best to succeed is an understatement. I tried to do better each day and must have succeeded for was given more and more responsibility. Alas, those were depression days when promotions were unheard of; rather, in 1932, the classification of Junior Typist Clerk, along with hundreds of others, was cut ten dollars a month. I was not affected by the decrease but remained 5 ½ years at $80.00 a month. Grateful to have that. I did continue to take any examinations given for the Intermediate level and finally, secured an appointment with the Department of Natural Resources as an Intermediate Information Clerk. Here my immediate supervisor recognized some ability in me for she was responsible for my promotion in 1939 to Senior Typist Clerk. This may not sound like much but I can tell you that senior grade clerical jobs were unheard of and as hard to get as an executive position. Representatives of the State Personnel Board and the Department of Finance interviewed my supervisor to ascertain all of the facts before they would approve such a high classification. She remained steadfast and they finally approved it. Of course that meant another Civil Service examination so once again, I hit the books. Mother used to give out difficult spelling words each night, and listen to me repeat the clerical manual which I memorized word for word. Anyway, I did pass No. 1 and so was appointed. God bless the tenacity of Audrey Ann Sollenberger, my boss. I later named my only daughter after her for she was the dearest woman I met during my 43+ years of State service. I have never encountered such another.
The real turning point in my State career took place, however, years later in Santa Rosa, California, on my 52nd birthday, when I was appointed as an Employment Security Assistant in the then State Department of Employment. This is actually the apprenticeship classification of the Employment Security Officer series, which are considered to be "professional" as opposed to "clerical." Having graduated from the clerical series, I am afraid I was not too impressed by the "professionalism" of some of this group. Besides, I would recall a statement made by a section head in Sacramento "An Employment Security Officer is only a good a good clerk with his brains knocked out." To say the least, I never did lose track of my earlier beginnings but remained thankful yet humble that I was seated behind the desk rather than in front of it.
I also realized that I was not a superior being ordained from on High to serve these less fortunate people. I had to take evening classes at college, pick up a smattering of algebra, and read tons of departmental releases on unemployment insurance, labor market information, etc. I also had to compete with young college students who were eager to "get their feet in the door." In this regard, aside from a fair written grade, I am sure my years of faithful service tipped the scale in my favor!
At the end of one year, I became a journeyman Employment Security Officer I and was assigned the position of Manpower Training Officer. This job involved the testing, selection, and referral of underprivileged persons to training under the Manpower Development and Training Act which was a part of President Johnson's War on Poverty. Not only did I initially interview them but followed their progress during training, saw that they were given jobs after training, and follow-up on them for a year after their employment. It was indeed a very gratifying job!
In l967 I transferred to the East Los Angeles Training Center where I continued in the same work but this time all of the people involved were Hispanics. I had to have an interpreter but otherwise, the work was the same. I can tell you that my eyes were opened to a new brand of poverty! These people had not only the usual crowded living conditions in squalor but also the language barrier. It was a real awakening for me!
During this same period I enrolled in a Management and Training night course at the East Los Angeles College preparatory to competing in the promotional examination for Employment Security Officer II. To my surprise I qualified in the examination and received an appointment in East Oakland among the black population. This was indeed the greatest challenge of my years with the State. I was now the "Technical Services Supervisor" responsible for the entire inner workings of the whole center. I was to report for work January 3, 1969, a date I will never forget. Even now I am surprised that I ever had the nerve to leave Los Angeles to travel alone to Oakland, register at the Travelodge, and report to an office situated in a questionable area of Oakland. I should quickly add that I was frightened as I walked rapidly through the black area. When I entered the office, I found myself certainly a minority! The manager who greeted me was a black man with a huge Afro haircut and a drooping mustache. With a cutlass between his teeth, he might have been a pirate! He was very gracious, however, and I became very fond of him, finding him to be a perfect gentleman. It was the beginning of a new experience, let me tell you. I managed to rise to the occasion and adapt myself to the new job. Everything was new but I found the people very agreeable and I feel I made many friends among those dear black people. In fact, I soon developed almost a protective attitude toward them for despite their so-called militaristic attitude, they were very child-like underneath. But that is another story.
I worked in Oakland until Audrey’s untimely death in 1976 when I retired to assist her husband in caring for her four children. I might add that the first person to come to the house to help was the little black secretary from East Oakland. At the time I retired I was on the Grade III list and promised an appointment in Sacramento to develop manuals. This would have been a triumph for me as I once served that section as a Senior Stenographer Clerk. I wanted that job desperately but felt the children needed me more. This was a foolish decision for Frank (the husband) remarried in about a year and a half so I was forced to leave the children anyway. I would have worked five more years but it just didn't happen. I am not too sure why I am telling you all of this but surely going from a Junior Typist Clerk to Employment Security Officer II is some accomplishment even if it took 34 ½ years to do it!
Mary did not work during the years that her two children were growing up except some part-time work at a drug store in North Sacramento. She did complete twenty years with the Department of Employment, however, beginning as an Intermediate Typist Clerk and advancing to the senior level in the Procurement Unit. As you may well guess, many intermediate clerks were anxious for the position but she got it. I was very proud of her!
That about sums up the accomplishments of the Whams except to say that my sister Muriel produced and reared two of the finest persons I've ever met. When I consider the problems she had, I am astonished and certainly consider it quite an accomplishment.
Insofar as my own immediate family is concerned, I am very naturally proud of my children. I hasten here to state that in all honesty I must give much of the credit to my mother. As you know, Tommy, she lived with me many years during their early years. She instilled in them honesty, integrity, responsibility, and a hundred other qualities that have made them the fine people they are today. It was she that was there to guide them, teach them to read, tell them stories, comfort them, etc., while I was at work. Of course, I devoted all of my "free" time to them but I give her full credit in their development. I suppose all parents have some recriminations about the rearing of their children. I know I often think about how I might have handled some things differently. However, as I see the two splendid citizens I helped to bring up, I feel altogether satisfied and certainly very blessed.
You are well acquainted with Kenneth, my firstborn, although it has been a long time since you saw him. He has, indeed, always been a joy to me.
He was born on August 6, 1933, during the Big Depression. He was a very beautiful baby born into bleak surroundings and desolation. I had taken a six-month leave of absence from my state job but financial conditions made it necessary for me to return to work five weeks after he was born. I recall how as a young twenty-year-old mother I used to cry each day when I would leave the baby. The folks had moved to the ranch in Orangevale by then and were struggling to exist. Eventually, mother asked me if she could come in each week and care for the baby just to earn what little I could pay her. That was the beginning of her years of caring for my children. Thank God for her! Of course, Ken was the joy of our lives. All of my youthful hopes and dreams seemed centered in him. As he grew he continued to be the very reason for my existence! I think perhaps it was because everywhere you looked in those trying times you saw so much poverty and misery. I am not wise enough to know why I felt so deeply but it is still a vivid memory.
Anyway, as Ken went on through school he excelled in his academic work always. We were very proud of him always even as I am today. However, rather than me trying to tell you of his accomplishments, he has given me a copy of his latest resume which details his professional career better than I could write it. More than that, though, he is active in community affairs and is altogether a very fine human being.
Glenn, my second child, was born March 21, l94l, nine months before Pearl Harbor. Ken was 7 ½ years old at the time and at first it was difficult to "stretch" myself over both. I soon mastered the art, however, and can say that I really enjoyed Glenn's babyhood and early childhood as much if not more than Ken's. The country was pulling out of the depression years, we had our own house, and were economically better off. Then, too, I was now 28 years old and perhaps had gained a little more wisdom with the passing years. Glenn was extremely quick, very intelligent, and fun to be around. I remember an occasion out at Nimbus when he was three years old. He had been out watching Dad fix the garden gate. Shortly after Dad had finished the task, he came into the house and asked me: "How old is that little boy?" I told him three. He then said: "He's the smartest damn kid I ever saw. While I was fixing the gate, he told me it wouldn't work and the God damn thing didn't!"
That was my Glenn. From his very early years he took a vital interest in everything and everybody around him. His entire life seemed to be focused on achievement. He always excelled in his classes at school, often setting the "curve" in them. I remember wondering how a child of mine could gobble up the learning like he did. I recall his French teacher in high school telling me: "I can't teach Glenn anything more for he has surpassed me." It was a bit frightening to have such a genius around but I did my best. He won a place in the National Merit Scholarship program in his senior year but unfortunately, was disqualified because both his father and I were employed. The fact that our combined salaries did not equal one good salary did not make a difference. He did win a local scholarship which helped considerably.
Of course, I am sure you know of his academic career at Berkeley -- four years of undergraduate work in the School of Engineering with one "B+." In 1963 he won the coveted University Medal for four years of excellence. I remember that Dr. Sproul [Glenn’s note—as I recall, it was Chancellor Edward Strong who made the presentation] made the remark in his presentation speech that he was happy that Glenn did get the "B+" in social studies for it proved he was human. Needless to say, we were all very proud of his accomplishment! I even dressed up and attended the President's Tea with him, sitting at a table with Nobel Prize winners. Boy, was I ever out of my league! But with the usual Wham fortitude I put my best foot forward and later Glenn would tell me that he was proud of me! How do you like that? All I did was keep my mouth shut for the most part!
[Note added by Glenn Secor. As University Medallist, I was invited to attend a luncheon at the University House, the residence of the then president, Clark Kerr. I could, of course, bring my parent as guests. Since Mother and Father were divorced, I was uncomfortable bringing both, and chose to bring Mother. We were seated at a table with Dr. Glenn T. Seaborg, Nobel Laureate, and his wife. Mother told Mrs. Seaborg how uncomfortable she was. Mrs. Seaborg responded something like this. "Both my husband and I have doctorates, but our son never finished high school (or maybe it was college), and look what yours has done. You don’t need to be uncomfortable." I remember Mrs. Seaborg as a truly gracious person!]
He remained at Berkeley to receive his Ph.D. in Engineering Science in 1965 [actually 1966]. During this period he married Jean Aspden. [Divorced in 1976.]
After graduation he would teach at the University of Utah, Salt Lake City, for several years [1967-1970]. In 1970 he accepted a position in the research section of the Bell Telephone Laboratories, Whippany, New Jersey, where he has remained.
I called him recently to find out exactly what he does at Bell Laboratories and he told me that he is a "Program Manager Supervisor" involved in the development of software for computer systems used in the communication systems of the company. My mind does not totally comprehend that but I do know that, monetarily at least, he has excelled any other family member. Often I consider this child of mine and find myself absolutely amazed at the long trail of triumphs behind him! Mothers think of strange things, don't they? I saw him when I was in New York City last summer and must say that the years have treated him kindly for his 48 years rest lightly on him!
Now let us consider Richard [son of Mary Leona Dorothy Wham Secor and Harry Edmund Secor, and Ruth’s nephew]. He has always been like my own son, you know. He and Ken are just seventeen months apart and were always very close. Mary and I took the two boys to the same doctor in Sacramento and I recall that he once told me that double cousins [the sisters, Mary and Ruth, married the brothers, Harry and Kenneth] have more blood relationship than brothers. Certainly these two proved that. They were truly "best friends" always. Richard was always somewhat shy and introverted, reading copiously which he still does. I remember that just from snatches of his conversation, I wondered if he was failing in his courses at Grant Union High School, when, in reality, he was always an outstanding student. Such humility! We all attended his high school graduation where he took all of the honors and then we all went to the airport to see him fly away to Annapolis. I still remember how proud I was yet a little sad to see one of our own flying away, knowing that he would be so changed when he returned. You must remember that Annapolis, Maryland was as far from my life as Mars! Since then I've been through there and it doesn't seem so remote. Of course he did not return as that same young man but after four very successful years at the academy, he was now an "officer and a gentlemen." He was also a married man, having married Jane Carroll in Boston, Massachusetts sometime during this period. Subsequently, he served twenty years in the navy, retiring as a Lt. Commander on June 30, 1977. I know very little about his actual naval career except he served some time on ammunition tender off the coast of Vietnam during that conflict. I do know that Richard is a very fine man and would proudly uphold the traditions of the navy! Following his discharge, he was shortly beset with health problems, eventually requiring open-heart surgery and the removal of a cataract from both eyes. Prior to his retirement he was stationed at Treasure Island near San Francisco and I was living in Oakland so we became "reacquainted." I really enjoyed him a great deal! Some of my happier recollections of my life in Oakland are the dinners we shared in Jack London Square just chatting about the family, both past and present, and considering future developments.
Lest you be carried away with the thought that the girls of my family are insignificant to this matter of accomplishment, please dismissed [sic] any such thoughts from your mind. I feel great pride in both my daughter, Audrey, and Mary's daughter Mary Julia (Judy). While neither girl completed college, I feel that they are certainly noteworthy.
Speaking for Audrey (I believe Judy somewhat shared this viewpoint) she declared early in life that she was not interested in academic achievement; she just wanted to be "happy" and after all, isn't that life’s greatest achievement? Audrey was what my Mother would have called "a joiner"; specifically, she was a Brownie Scout, a Girl Scout, and a member of the International Rainbow for Girls (a youth group sponsored by the Masonic Lodge). In each organization she worked furiously to excel, receiving all of her scouting merit badges in quick succession. I remember wondering why she was so enthusiastic about these badges. I am certain now that it was her way of receiving recognition as opposed to academic excellence. Not that she was by any means a poor student. She was always in the upper part of the class but she just felt that a "B" served her purposes so why struggle? Besides she liked people and the social side of life -- like her father, no doubt. I remember when she was in the first grade. I went dutifully to the open house night for parents. After hearing the second grade teacher laud Glenn's scholastic ability, I went to the first grade room where I was told by the teacher: "Audrey is a good student but capable of doing better but I am sure she could tell you the color of everybody's eyes in the class." So it was throughout her brief life span. People were extremely vital to her.
When she was twelve she was initiated into the International Order of Rainbow for Girls where she worked feverishly to enter into the social aspects of the group, to excel in the delivery of the ritual, and finally was rewarded the coveted "Grand Officer" status. She easily memorized the entire ritual book and was outstanding in her delivery.
After high school, she attended one year at Sacramento City College taking nursing-type courses to become a registered nurse. This blew my mind. She brought home a skull one night that had all of the nerves outlined on it and little hinged doors on it so she could study both inside and out. She also told me about how she would dissect human bodies in the class in the same calm manner as if they were frogs. I am sure she would have made an excellent nurse but cupid entered in so she quit school and married [Galen] Frank[lin] Watkins, completing only one year of college.
I should add here that after her first child, Ruthann, was born in Santa Rosa she did return to school at Sonoma State College taking additional nursing courses. She again had to give this up to care for the baby. However, once more in Oakland she applied to Merritt College to resume the study in the fall of 1976. Ironically, the acceptance from the college arrived the day following her death.
Poor girl, her nursing skills, her patience, and love would stand the severest test for in 1967 in Montebello her second child was born a victim of spina bifida (open spine with severe nerve damage). He was rushed to the Hollywood Children's Hospital where the opening was closed but the resulting damage to the child will last his lifetime. She brought the little crippled baby home and from that moment on she became an efficient practical machine in the care of the child. I never did see such a transformation! She read articles on the disease, consulted clinics, and left no stone unturned in his care. After we moved to Oakland, she began her regular trips to Shrine Hospital in San Francisco where his limbs were straightened and braces made for his legs. He had neither bowel nor bladder control and she found out what prophylactics could be used and immediately put them to use. In all of this she moved forward like a five star general. I was simply stunned. She continued this same care until her death, unrelenting in her determination to keep this boy as normal as possible so he could go to school.
He did enter the Charles Whitten School for the Handicapped in Oakland when he was three. She immediately began her work in the school so that after two years, she was an essential part of the parents' group. During all of this time she was also very active in the Zion Lutheran Church School which the older girl attended. She entered into the activities with a zest and zeal that boggled one's mind. She took over the hot lunch program with enthusiasm and soon reduced it to a science with written menus for each week during the school term, preparation directions, and even amounts to buy. This was greatly appreciated by her successor. Early on, the little crippled boy left the special school and entered Zion. This required her going up to the school twice a day to insure that he was dry and clean. She was always faithful in this, too.
She wrote and directed the 1975 Christmas pageant, which was very excellent. The pastor who spoke at her funeral spoke most highly of her contributions to both the school and the church. The large church was packed at her funeral, both black and white. I was so distraught at the loss of this dedicated girl that the funeral seems remote. I do recall, however, one old black lady with tears streaming down her cheeks coming up to me and saying "She was one of us. Now we have nobody." Audrey was like that -- she was really one of everybody she met. A few years later the same pastor would marry Ruthann and Dwayne Allen. At that time he described my Audrey "some kind of a great lady." I wonder, Tommy, if such high praise is not, after all, a very great accomplishment?
Audrey's death was, of course, the greatest tragedy of my life. Never in my wildest imagination did I ever think that I would live to bury one of my own children. When I looked at her four little children (ages from three months to thirteen years), I felt I should retire early to assist Frank in their care. As I said before, this cut off five years that I might have worked but at the time, it seemed wise. As it turned out it was a foolish thing to do but that is another story.
Now let us consider Mary Julia Secor, Aunt Mary's daughter. Unfortunately, I did not get to be around her much during her early years so do not know her quite as intimately as I do Richard. She was an adorable little girl, I recall. Aunt Mary dressed her like a small doll. I remember how I envied her having a girl. So much so, in fact, that when my Glenn was born two years later, I was absolutely amazed that he was another boy. Judy was born in 1939 just after we had purchased our first house; Ken had started to school; I had just been promoted to a senior level and somehow we didn't see much of the baby. Then came Glenn and WW II, my move to Nimbus, Audrey’s birth; I just don't really know why Judy's childhood slipped away from me. Anyway, it did. On the few occasions that I did see her, I was always impressed with her beauty and quiet manners. In l947 after the war, we began to build the house on Pine Avenue, which was a relentless, time-consuming job, and again, I seldom saw Judy. She did come to stay overnight once but I suspect found us somewhat dull inasmuch as the age difference with Audrey was too great for them to be compatible like Ken and Richard.
Well, as I said before, Audrey became deeply committed to her Rainbow Assembly and before I knew it, I was involved in it up to my neck so I sort of lost touch with Judy. During those years she developed into a very lovely young lady.
We all attended Judy's high school graduation at Grant Union High School and were pleased and proud of her. To Mary's consternation that same evening Clifford Webb, Judy's high school boy friend, gave her a diamond engagement ring. This relationship terminated in marriage in 1958, two nice children, and subsequently, two adorable grandchildren. I see Judy and her family only occasionally these days but keep in touch through Mary. Clifford is Business Manager for the Teamsters Union in Sacramento, a very challenging but lucrative position. Judy herself returned to work after her children left the nest. She is employed as a Secretary/Receptionist for the Sacramento County School District. She is quite successful in her job, drives a lovely car, and lives in an absolutely picture home in Carmichael. Certainly these are the greatest accomplishments any gal can make!
I will not touch on the accomplishments of the Secor grandchildren except my own granddaughter, Julianna [Louise Secor], Ken's oldest child. I say this because, insofar as life is concerned, she is the only one that has really "arrived." She is now twenty-eight, is attending Cal. State University, Bakersfield, taking evening classes toward her doctorate. Currently, she is a speech pathologist at the Richardson Center for Special Children here in Bakersfield. For three years she has taught a class of pre-school children with learning disabilities, deafness, impaired speech, etc. To watch the awakening of a child entering her class in the fall to one able to at least partially function to the limit of his capabilities by the time the school term is over is indeed somewhat of a miracle in itself. She loves each child dearly and seems able to bring out the very best each has to give. We go out to her classroom on holidays or special events and it is indeed remarkable to watch their "awakening" under her influence and tutelage. She is certainly one in a million! I feel the difference she is making in the future lives of her pupils is perhaps the greatest accomplishment a person can hope to make!
I believe that about sums up family accomplishments. Audrey's oldest daughter, Ruthann, is married, living with her husband and little daughter in Fresno. She is employed by an insurance company and studying evenings so she will be qualified for advancement when positions become available. She is very bright and I am sure she will be very successful.
The other grandchildren are younger and still in the development stages of their lives.
I hope you can get something of what you are seeking out of this.
Aunt Ruth