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"If serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve. . . . But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord." Joshua 24:15.
"The restoration and uplifting of humanity begins in the home. The work of parents underlies every other. Society is composed of families, and is what the heads of families make it. Out of the heart are 'the issues of life' (Proverbs 4:23); and the heart of the community, of the church, and of the nation is the household. The well-being of society, the success of the church, the prosperity of the nation, depend upon home influences. " —The Ministry of Healing, p. 349.
You have the privilege of a Christian home. You have Bible counsel for the conduct of home life! You can do your part to make your home a happy place!
The Lord has a special interest in the social and spiritual heath of our homes because in their interplay of love, authority and obedience the foundations for good or ill are being laid for all later human relationships—both secular and spiritual. God bless your home!
In this lesson outline of Bible texts concerning the home and family, you will discover—
HOME AND FAMILY ESTABLISHED
1. How, when, and by whom was the family established'? Matthew 19:4-6.
Matthew 19:4-6 (NIV) "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' 5) and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? 6) So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
2. How does the Bible picture the ideal wife and mother? Proverbs 31:10-12, 26-28.
Proverbs 31:10-12 (NIV) A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. 11) Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. 12) She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. Proverbs
31:26-28 (NIV) She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 27) She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 28) Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:
3. How does the Bible describe the proper relationship between husbands and wives? Ephesians 5:22-31.
Ephesians 5:22-31 (NIV) Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23) For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24) Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25) Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26) to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27) and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28) In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29) After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church-- 30) for we are members of his body. 31) "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."
Note: Many a Christian home has been made unhappy by a husband quoting and seeking to enforce "wives submit to your husbands." Just because the husband is portrayed as the "head" of the wife does not indicate He should be bossy or dictatorial--far from it. He is to be like Christ. Notice the teaching and example of Christ on this important subject: Luke 22:25-27 (NIRV) Jesus said to them, “The kings of the Gentiles hold power over their people. And those who order them around call themselves Protectors. 26) But you must not be like that. Instead, the most important among you should be like the youngest. The one who rules should be like the one who serves. 27) Who is more important? Is it the one at the table, or the one who serves? Isn’t it the one who is at the table? But I am among you as one who serves.
The following passage applies to both men and women but especially helpful for men to understand what it means to love his wife as Christ loved the church:
Philippians 2:4-7 (NIRV) None of you should look out just for your own good. Each of you should also look out for the good of others. 5) As you deal with one another, you should think and act as Jesus did. 6) In his very nature he was God. Jesus was equal with God. But Jesus didn’t take advantage of that fact. 7) Instead, he made himself nothing. He did this by taking on the nature of a servant.
"Neither the husband nor the wife should attempt to exercise over the other an arbitrary control. Do not try to compel each other to yield to your wishes. You cannot do this and retain each other's love. Be kind, patient, and forbearing, considerate, and courteous. By the grace of God you can succeed in making each other happy, as in your marriage vow you promised to do."--Adventist Home p. 118
BIBLE IDEAL OF A HOME
4. What kind of home environment did God give Adam and Eve? Genesis 2:8.
Genesis 2:8 (NIV) Now the LORD God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden; and there he put the man he had formed.
5. How do the Scriptures describe the home life of Jesus? Luke 2:39-40, 51-52.
Luke 2:39-40 (NIV) When Joseph and Mary had done everything required by the Law of the Lord, they returned to Galilee to their own town of Nazareth. 40) And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom, and the grace of God was upon him.
Luke 2:51-52 (NIV) Then he went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. But his mother treasured all these things in her heart. 52) And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men.
6. What is the most important influence in family togetherness? Colossians 3:12-14.
Colossians 3:12-14 (NIV) Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13) Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14) And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
7. List some of Paul's counsel for Christian households. Colossians 3:18-21.
Colossians 3:18-21 (NIV) Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19) Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. 20) Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 21) Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.
Note: Notice that a wife's submission is not unconditional. The text says "as is fitting in the Lord"." Wives and children must remember there is a command that supersedes the command to submit to a husband or obey their parents: Acts 5:29 (NIV) "We must obey God rather than men!" God's commands are to be obeyed even if it causes disobedience to a command of a husband or parent.
8. What happens when children are undisciplined? Proverbs 29:15.
Proverbs 29:15 (NIV) The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.
Note: The use "the rod of correction" does not mean a child should be spanked for every act of disobedience but it does mean they should be corrected. The following counsel is helpful: "Whipping may be necessary when other resorts fail, yet she should not use the rod if it is possible to avoid doing so. But if milder measures prove insufficient, punishment that will bring the child to its senses should in love be administered. Frequently one such correction will be enough for a lifetime, to show the child that he does not hold the lines of control. And when this step becomes necessary, the child should be seriously impressed with the thought that this is not done for the gratification of the parent, or to indulge arbitrary authority, but for the child's own good. He should be taught that every fault uncorrected will bring unhappiness to himself and will displease God. Under such discipline children will find their greatest happiness in submitting their wills to the will of the heavenly Father."--Child Guidance p. 250
9. What counsel did God give to Israel about the instruction of their children? Deuteronomy 6:4-9.
Deuteronomy 6:4-9 (NIV) Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. 5) Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6) These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7) Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8) Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9) Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
10. How did Jesus regard children? Matthew 18:2-6.
Matthew 18:2-6 (NIV) He called a little child and had him stand among them. 3) And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4) Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5) "And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. 6) But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.
Note: "Parents should explain and simplify the plan of salvation to their children, that their young minds may comprehend it. Children of eight, ten, or twelve years are old enough to be addressed on the subject of personal religion. Do not teach your children in reference to some future period when they shall be old enough to repent and believe the truth. If properly instructed, very young children may have correct views of their state as sinners and of the way of salvation through Christ."—Testimonies, vol. 1, p. 400.
11. What instruction did Paul give and why? Ephesians 6:1-3.
Ephesians 6:1-3 (NIV) Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2) "Honor your father and mother"-- which is the first commandment with a promise-- 3) "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth."
12. What kind invitation to children did Jesus extend? Matthew 19:14.
Matthew 19:14 (NIV) Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."
13. What is recorded about Abraham and his family? Genesis 18:19.
Genesis 18:19 (NIV) For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just, so that the LORD will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him."
Note: While it is true that there things we must require of our children even if they don't want to do it, such as family rules, chores, bedtime, homework or even church attendance our ultimate goal is to win their hearts "to keep the way of the Lord". Remember God wants them to love Him and love cannot be forced or coerced. If you can lead your children to truly love God they will obey Him and you.
14. What counsel does Paul give to Titus regarding the young and old? Titus 2:2-8.
Titus 2:2-10 (NIRV) 2) Tell the older men that in anything they do, they must not go too far. They must be worthy of respect. They must control themselves. They must have true faith. They must love others. They must not give up. 3) In the same way, teach the older women to lead a holy life. They must not tell lies about others. They must not let wine control them. Instead, they must teach what is good. 4) Then they can advise the younger women to love their husbands and children. 5) The younger women must control themselves and be pure. They must take good care of their homes. They must be kind. They must follow the lead of their husbands. Then no one will be able to speak evil things against God’s word. 6) In the same way, help the young men to control themselves. 7) Do what is good. Set an example for them in everything. When you teach, be honest and serious. 8) No one can question the truth. So teach what is true. Then those who oppose you will be ashamed. That’s because they will have nothing bad to say about us.
DISCIPLESHIP COMMITMENT
"Pleasant voices, gentle manners, and sincere affection that finds expression in all the actions, together with industry, neatness, and economy, make even a hovel the happiest of homes. The Creator regards such a home with approbation." —The Adventist Home, p. 422.
In your own words tell why a Christian home naturally has more joy and happiness than others:
Unless otherwise designated, scripture taken from the Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION�. Copyright � 1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society. All rights reserved throughout the world. Used by permission of International Bible Society.