Welcome to Poly-ish Movie Reviews, where I watch the crap so you don't have to!  A former partner of mine once said that movies on "poly movie lists" should come with a warning sticker that says "WARNING! Terrible decisions inside!"  The fact is that most poly lists are padded with movies that strain the definition of "polyamory" past the breaking point.  Most movies aren't about multiple loving relationships at all - the broadest definition of the term we have, which is just the literal translation of the word.  If a movie shows at least one character who has sex with at least two other characters, there's a good chance that the movie will find itself on someone's "poly" list.

Then there's the quality of the movie itself.  Production value, acting, writing, directing, score - all of these can make or break a movie.  What good is a poly movie if people hate watching it?  Another fact is that movies about "alternative lifestyles" tend to be independent movies, experimental movies, or movies from other cultures (yes, this is a US-centric show, because the host was born and raised in the US and has never actually left it).  This means that they don't usually have a Hollywood budget to work with.  We can debate the "quality" of Hollywood movies, but if nothing else, they sure look pretty and have the formula down for how to keep an audience's attention, since that's what brings in the money.  Indie and experimental films can be quite good because they're not restricted to the formulaic rules of Hollywood.  But they can also be terrible because they shun those formulas that have proven to entertain large audiences for decades.  Or sometimes they're terrible because the story itself is bucking some moral value that the rest of us think is important.  Now, in polyamory, we are often bucking "traditional" morals because, let's face it, those morals are often pretty unethical and uncompassionate.  But, just because Galileo was shunned for his maverick ideas, it doesn't mean that all maverick ideas are Galilean.

So, the short story here is that I watch a lot of movies.  Some of those movies are great.  But a lot of them are crap.  I'm here to help you sort out which is which, so that you don't have to waste your time on bad cinema, unless that's your thing.  No judgement - I like a lot of terrible movies.  I'm just saying that, as we polys know, love may be infinite, but time is not.  Let me help you manage that increasingly rare and precious time of yours by sharing my opinions on movies that some have claimed to be "poly" so that you can make better decisions on which ones to spend your time with.

So, go, curl up with your loved ones (or by yourself, if that's also your thing), and, as the much better, iconic reviewers used to say, I'll see you at the movies!

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