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You want to know why you are being bullied, picked on or just generally walked all over? Well here's the short and skinny. And you are not going to like what you have to do to solve it.
I don't know how people have belittled the problem of bullying for so long. Saying stuff like "it happens to everybody" or "just man up" or even "oh, get over it".
Bullying is a serious problem that can be the cause of serious mental problems and it will have an influence on the rest of your life.
But yes, it is "normal" and there is no "cure" for this problem.(but don't stop reading)
I've had my share of bullying in school, I have analyzed it at length as to why they were doing it, and why me.
But I was young, and it took a fabulous teacher to open my eyes.
It turns out that it is human nature when in a group to pick on the weakest ones so that the top becomes a more tighter group.
So there is no cure for bullying, the only thing you can do is make very clear that you are not the weakest one.
The best way to do that is violence.
You are probably going to object to that since the ones being bullied are usually the gentlehearted non aggressive people. But you don't actually have to resort to violence, you just have to be very convincing that you will resort to violence when anybody tries to bully you.
If people are already bullying you, it is very very hard to get this in their heads. So get out of there and when you start somewhere fresh, make sure that the first time anybody tries to bully you, act aggressively and make a loud statement that you will not be treated like that or else... You probably have to practice this in the mirror and come up with some good words.
That's it, that's how I got rid of my bullies when I went to a new school. Later they tried it again and I actually kicked one in the balls. I do not approve of violence, but you have to act at the first sign of bullying. That move by the way, earned me their respect and they never tried anything again, they even made attempts to be my friends. Don't be their friend tho, be the outsider they shouldn't mess with. Because if you are inside their little superiority complex driven group, you will have to keep proving your self by bullying others.
The world is a crazy place. that is, unless you understand a bit more about human nature and group psychology. Then you will be very angry and disappointed in the people for a while and finally you will learn to accept it and use it for your own benefit.
If you are not a confident person, act confident.
If you are trying to keep everybody happy, don't. Just focus on your friends and family they are the only ones who truly deserve that.
Read my other post how being nice makes you unhappy
Being timid and trying to keep everybody happy is a sign of an inferiority complex. The main cause of this is you being bullied. People with a inferiority complex are going to get bullied. It is a vicious circle that you have to break out of before you end up killing yourself.
You feel like you are worthless because you are bullied, so you think there has to be something wrong with you. No there is nothing wrong with you. you are just better then them and they hate it. You are a better person then they are for not wanting to fight or hurt anyone. But they don't have to know that.
So go kick some balls. Preferably not literal, but be prepared to do it so that you are convincing enough. And trust me, the bullies will stay away.
Ow gawd, I really can sound like a smug know-it-all sometimes.
Anyway. That's my thoughts on bullying. Hope it helps.
Special thanks to :
for inspiring me to write a comment which turned into this post.
Blogger.com /blogspot for it's incompatency to create ab link to a comment.
HXPanda, this is for you and everybody like you.
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