Alone Time Versus Isolation

2018 October, Grand Canyon Healing Trip

Copyright by Carmen Turner Schott, Author

As a 12th house Sun and Venus person I have always felt the urge to withdrawal from the world and spend time alone. I loved hanging out with people for a certain amount of time, but even at a young age I realized I was different. I had a strong need to stay home or be with myself to recover and recoup my energies. I remember feeling very drained and tired after being around friends, family or after a day at school. I felt better after spending some time alone and in a peaceful environment.

Alone time is healthy for 12th house people. We need it to heal, recover and survive because of our heightened sensitivity to the environment and other people. We are psychic sponges who absorb everything going on around us. We pick up loud noises, emotions and other people’s energy very easily. This lack of boundaries between our self and others is prominent at a young age, even if we did not realize it.

I was 16 years old when I read about the Sun in the 12th house for the first time and it was the first time that I felt validated and that I felt my personality was described accurately. It made me feel better about my need for alone time. Spending time alone reading, meditating, journaling or listening to music is a healthy way to experience alone time.

The other side of this house is isolation. The danger of isolation is that 12th house people often want to withdrawal and hide when they feel a challenge in their lives or if they are experiencing high levels of stress. It is healthy to focus on ourselves more when we need to balance our life and energies. Although it can become unhealthy if we try to avoid people and places in order to be reclusive. There is a fine line between alone time and avoidance. Avoidance and isolation can be a coping mechanism designed to protect oneself, but can also further isolate us causing more loneliness, depression and anxiety.

We need to recognize this and learn about our own unique phases of 12th house withdrawal. Unhealthy withdrawal might include avoiding work, the practical duties we have to complete to live in this material world. The material world can be a cruel reality and feel harsh for many 12th house people, but we must face it and live in this world.

We chose to be here in physical form. Our soul has to be in the world, but not of the world. Being our true spiritual self in a practical way is the aim as we are in a physical body for a reason. Our goal is to be in the world but not let the world get into us. I remember when I was younger and I felt like I did not want to be in the world, because I felt like I was not from here. I disliked practical responsibilities and it was difficult and painful. It felt easier to join a monastery, temple or become a religious ascetic giving up all worldly possessions. Although I realized that this was not the answer. I would feel guilty for having material things or money. I would feel I should not have these things and should give to others. A friend of mine at the time yelled at me and told me that I did not take a vow of poverty. They were right. I realized that running away and avoiding the real world was not the answer. This was running away from my true soul mission.

12th house people are here to help others in this practical world. If we hide away, we can’t use our spiritual gifts and abilities to truly uplift others. To tread a spiritual path takes both practical and spiritual balance. When I experienced heartache or betrayal years ago, I wanted to hide. I wanted to avoid people and spend time with a select few that I trusted or alone. I stayed home and worked as an astrologer from home for two years. I avoided people and only did consultations online. I avoided people and isolated myself because I was wounded.

I had worked at a difficult job with very difficult people and left with feeling drained and hurt. I was worried about being around negative people again. I was very trusting and open hearted and experienced betrayal and disloyalty. I isolated and hid for my own protection, but after two years I felt a change. I knew and realized that God needed me to go out in the world again. I knew he would force me out, and I knew it was because I was a 12th house person. The energy changed and I received my answer. I knew what being a 12th house person meant and I knew I had to help others and use my spiritual gifts in the real world. I was avoiding my destiny and withdrawing became a negative coping mechanism. It became isolation.

I re-entered the world and began counseling others again and helped many people. I realized that being in the practical world was the only way I can achieve happiness in some way. By helping others it helped me heal. This is why 12th house people attract people with problems from a young age. We naturally attract the wounded, because we have experienced wounding ourselves. We attract others to us like moths to a flame. Our light shines brightly and others feel our empathic nature and kindness.

As 12th house people we need to balance and walk in this world, but not let the negativity and materialism sway us from our mission. Our mission is Compassionate Service to others in the practical world.