Commonly Misused Words

The following are words that are often confused with one another:

Accept / Except

To ‘accept’ is to receive, while to ‘except’ is to exclude. They’re not opposites, but are also not synonymous. When people mistake them, they usually use except when they mean accept.

She was honored to accept the Oscar for Best Screenplay.

We all went to the movie, except Tina, who stayed home to babysit the kids.

Among / Between

You may have heard that you should use ‘between’ for two items and ‘among’ for three or more. This, however, is not, strictly speaking, correct.

You must take into account the relationship of a person or thing with the other people or things in the sentence, taken distinctly and separately.

First, an easy example: Let’s keep this little secret between you and me. You would never, of course, say: Let’s keep this little secret among you and me. (And don’t ever say or write between you and I, unless you want a grammarian’s ears to blow smoke.)

Here are two more easy examples:

The championship came down to one final game between the Rams and the Saints.

The board decided to divide the donations between two charities.

You only have two entities, so choosing ‘between’ is obvious.

So it’s true: you don’t use ‘among’ for fewer than three elements in a sentence. Instead, you use ‘between.’ But it gets more complicated when three or more actors populate a sentence. Then, ‘between’ can and should be used, in many instances.

After NAFTA, more trade occurred between Mexico, Canada, and the United States.

A new trade agreement was reached between Canada, the United States, and Mexico.

I can’t decide between the blue, black, or yellow Polo shirt.

Shirley had trouble deciding between George, Biff, and Scooter for her prom date.

Beyonce had to choose between five record companies, all of which tried to sign her.

You see? ‘Between’ bridges specific entities. When you are addressing less specific actors, however, you use ‘among.’ That’s because ‘among’ refers to undefined or collective relationships — i.e. things that are not distinct or individual.

When you use ‘among,’ you change the meaning.

Keeping peace among neighboring countries in the Middle East has proven difficult.

We don’t know specifically which Middle Eastern countries are referred to, although we could probably guess.

You might say: Negotiations between Great Britain, the European Union, and the United States are progressing. That’s because the negotiations are specific between these nations. But you could also say: Tensions among the member states of the European Union are at an all-time high, because we don’t know which specific countries you are referring to.

A consensus emerged among members not to endorse the congressman after his sex scandal.

Which members? Well, we don’t know for sure.

‘Between’ and ‘among’ also convey different meanings when it comes to indicating direction.

Your car key is somewhere among the books.

Your car key is somewhere between the books.

These two sentences communicate different meanings. The first says that you’ll find your car key in the midst of the books, maybe in that pile of them in the corner. The second says your car key fell between two (or more) books.

Another bookish example:

He hid a secret treasure map between the pages of his journal, not among the pages of his journal.

Since ‘between’ and ‘among’ are prepositions, you need to choose the appropriate pronoun. It should always be “between you and me” and never, as stated above, “between you and I…” Proper grammar is “between you and her” or “between you and him” and never “between you and she” or “between you and he.”

Because of / Due To / Since

This trips up a lot of writers. Before we begin, let’s give a round of applause for brevity. Avoid clumsy, needlessly wordy phrases like “due to the fact that,” “on account of,” “on the grounds that,” and “owing to the fact that.” Banish them from your brain; you don’t need them.

The classic grammarian rule governing the use of ‘due to’ requires that you view it as an adjective, almost always following some form of the verb ‘to be.’ School’s cancellation is due to the heavy snow storm. ‘Due to’ modifies ‘cancellation.’ But you can’t say, School was cancelled due to the snow because ‘due to’ has nothing to modify. You’d have to say School was cancelled because of the snow.

If you’re confused, use ‘because of.’’ It’s far more common than ‘due to,’ which is often a synonym for ‘attributable to,’ ‘caused by,’ or ‘resulting from.’ Also, never start a sentence with ‘due to.’ Follow these rules and you’ll avoid grammatical heartbreak.

Now, ‘since’ can be used in place of ‘because of’ in many, but not all, instances. Since I love the taste of mint, I bought 12 boxes of Girl Scout cookies means exactly the same thing as Because I love the taste of mint, I bought 12 boxes of Girl Scout cookies.

Of course, ‘since’ is used in other ways. It conveys the passage of time. Since yesterday, I have binge-watched the entire first season of House of Cards on Netflix.

Imply / Infer

Imply and infer are opposites, like throw and catch. When you imply, you hint at something. When you infer you make an educated guess. Remember: the speaker does the implying; the listener does the inferring.

Lay / Lie

You lie down on the bed but you lay the blanket on the bed. You don’t lay down on the bed and you don’t lie the blanket on the bed. Get it?

Split / Divide

You usually (but not always) ‘split between’ and ‘divide among.’ Split implies two equal parts. We split the check. You could also say, We split the check between the four of us. So each of you paid a quarter of the tab. If you say, We divided the check among the four of us, each paid your fair share. (Whoever ordered an extra glass of wine should pony up more.)

Than / Then

Then is an adverb. I ate dinner, then played Mahjong until the wee hours of the morning. ‘Then’ modifies the verb ‘played,’ in this instance. I did this, then I did this, then I ate this, then I ate that and so forth. ‘Then’ situates actions in time. You also rely on it with ‘if.’ If you don’t exercise and eat right, then you might suffer from high cholesterol.

Than, on the other hand, is a conjunction used for comparisons. My cat is more playful than yours or My recipe for Bulgogi is better than his.

It’s / Its

Only carelessness explains why people mess this up. ‘It’s’ is a contraction that stands for ‘it is.’ It’s time to go v. it is time to go.
‘Its’ is the possessive for the pronoun ‘it.’ I love my new iPhone; its design is so intuitive. Easy, right?

Their / There and Your / You’re / Yours

‘Their’ and ‘there,’ are homophones; they sound the same but have different meanings.

‘Their’ is possessive. Their house is the mansion on the corner of State Avenue and Vine Street. Or They left their coats at my house.

‘There’ is a location. How did you end up over there by the kitchen?

‘Your’ and ‘you’re’ are also homonyms.

Your is possessive. It’s your turn to take out the trash or Take me to your leader, earthlings.

‘You’re’ is a contraction that stands for ‘you are.’ You’re right. This grammar lesson is absolutely fascinating.

With ‘yours,’ you’re getting into an obscure area of grammar known as “possessive determiners.” What’s that, you say? Actually, it’s simple. You know about possessive pronouns (hers, his, their), right. We use possessive pronouns in place of a noun. Possessive determiners, however, go before a noun.

That’s not your [determiner] problem. It’s mine [pronoun].

That’s not her [determiner] car that’s been blocking my driveway for the past three hours, right? Hers [pronoun] is a bright yellow Tesla Sedan.

Is that his [determiner] iPad floating in the bathtub? No, his [pronoun] is in the fireplace under that burning log.

Note: we don’t use an ‘s’ after one of these determiners or pronouns. You wouldn’t say, Those shoes are hers’. You would say, Those shoes are hers, except for the exception with the ‘you‘ form. So you do an add ‘s’ sometimes to yours. That’s not her laptop. It’s yours.

Who's / Whose

The first, ‘who’s,’ is short for ‘who is’ -- it’s a contraction. The second, ‘whose,’ is the possessive form.

Who’s knocking on my door?

Whose footsteps do I hear?

Subsume / Sublimate

Subsume means to include or absorb (something) in something else.

She complained that her neighborhood was subsumed by violence.

His agency was subsumed by the Department of Agriculture.

According to Merriam-Webster, sublimate means “to divert the expression of (an instinctual desire or impulse) from its unacceptable form to one that is considered more socially or culturally acceptable.” Nineteenth-century women sublimated their sexual desires, for example.