Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services
Frequently Asked Questions
On DDSV Services
What will happen during my appointment at Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services?
At your appointment, a support advocate will discuss confidentiality and check in with you around what concerns you are having. Within the appointment, you are welcome to say how much or how little you want. A support advocate will work with you in providing support options.
What does Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services do? / Not do?
DDSV Services can:
Discuss topics such as; coping strategies, healthy relationships, consent,
Advocate for academic supports
Discuss available resources
Discuss and facilitate reporting options
Provide support, advocacy and accompaniment throughout reporting processes
Discuss safety plans
DDSV Services does not:
Provide counselling or therapy
Implement sanctions or consequences against people who cause harm
Who does Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services support?
DDSV Services provides support to anyone in the MRU community including; students, staff and faculty who have been impacted by Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence
This includes people who are supporting those who have been impacted
People of all gender identities, expressions and sexualities are welcome
How can I speak to someone at Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services?
To book an appointment with DDSV Services you can:
Book an appointment using an online calendar
Have an DDSV Services reach out to you
Email ddsv@mtroyal.ca
Are our conversations confidential?
Conversations are confidential; however, there are a few legal limitations to confidentiality. These limitations are;
If there is concern around suicide and/or homicide and a plan cannot be made to keep you or someone else safe.
In circumstances where there is concern of current child abuse.
If a designated health care professional (Doctor, Nurse, Psychologist, Social Worker, Physiotherapist, etc.) under the Health Professions Act engages in sexual misconduct while practicing
If DDSV Services is ever compelled by the Court (subpoenaed)
If there is concern for imminent risk or harm to the MRU community
A support advocate will go over these limitations at the beginning of your appointment and check in around any questions that you might have about this.
Can I make an appointment even if I’m not sure if I have experienced dating, domestic or sexual violence?
Yes. It is normal to be confused about what you are experiencing and words like 'violence' may not feel like the best descriptor of your experience.
Can I disclose past dating, domestic and sexual violence or only recent experiences?
DDSV Services provides support to any one who has experienced dating, domestic and/or sexual violence at any point in their lives.
On Reporting to MRU
When it comes to reporting, talking to someone from DDSV Services can help you understand how the Gender Based Violence and Misconduct Policy may apply to your situation.
How do I report an incident of Gender Based Violence and Misconduct or Dating, Domestic and/or Sexual Violence to MRU?
A report can be made through Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services.
What happens once I submit a report with Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services?
DDSV Services will go over the reporting process with you and answer questions that you may have. DDSV Services will work with you to identify what safety concerns and support needs you may need.
DDSV Services will help determine what procedure the report would fall under. This depends on the role of the individual at MRU that is being reported.
If they are an employee, the report will go through the Human Resources procedures.
If they are a student, the report will go through the Office of Student Community Standards procedures.
An investigation will take place where information is collected and relevant parties are interviewed.
The investigator writes a finding of fact document and submits it to the relevant office that the report has been made under (HR or OSCS)
The relevant office will make a decision report is either substantiated or unsubstantiated.
If substantiated, the person who was reported is found to have breached the policy and given sanctions or consequences.
Are all reports investigated?
No. MRU can only take action on reports that are within the scope of its policy. This means, that it can only investigate reports that are; on MRU property, at an MRU sanctioned event or have significant adverse impacts on MRU operations.
DDSV Services can talk with you about if a report is within scope.
What is the difference between a disclosure and a report?
A disclosure is sharing information about an incident of dating, domestic or sexual violence with another person. It is often done to access help, support, and information. A disclosure can be made to anybody, including Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services.
A report is a statement given to inform an institution (such as MRU or the police) about an incident. A report may result in an investigation and recourse for the person who caused harm.
You can disclose an incident without making a report and still get confidential support from Dating, Domestic and Sexual Violence Services.
Can I make an anonymous disclosure?
Anonymous disclosure can be made through filling out this form.
Anonymous disclosures are used to help better understand the campus climate at MRU and promote a culture of consent.
In most circumstances, MRU cannot proceed with an investigation when the complaint is anonymous because of an institutional obligation to procedural fairness. A component of procedural fairness is that a person who has been accused has a right to understand the nature of a report that has been made against them.
Does MRU have an obligation to report to the police?
No. This is a decision that an individual who has experienced the harm can decide whether or not they want to report to the police.
If you would like support with reporting to the police or understanding the process, DDSV Services can help with this.
Where can I find more information about reporting at MRU?
The policy and procedures on reporting dating, domestic and sexual violence can be found on mru.ca/ddsv policy section.
Understanding Gender Based Violence
What is Gender-Based Violence?
Gender-Based Violence is an umbrella term that encompasses a broad range of behaviours, whether by word or action, that use and abuse the control over another person and is perpetrated against someone based on their gender expression, gender identity, or perceived gender.
It is behaviours, whether by word or action, that are attempted, threatened, or committed against someone based on their gender expression, gender identity, or sexuality, without the person’s Consent.
This includes, but is not limited to:
Sexual Assault: Any form of unwanted sexual contact done by one person or people to another person or people without consent.
Sexual Harassment: Unwanted or uninvited sexual advances, remarks, gestures, images, sounds and actions that make a person feel unsafe, intimidated, degraded or uncomfortable, or their sexual integrity is compromised, even if the person harassing claims to have been only joking or didn’t mean to offend.
Sexual Violence: means Aany violence, physical or psychological, carried out without consent through a sexual means or by targeting sexuality.
Domestic Violence
Dating Violence
Indecent Exposure:
Distribution of a sexually explicit photographs or videos without the subject’s Consent.
Understanding Consent
What is consent?
Consent is the communicated agreement to sexual activity. Ensuring that consent is present is key to a positive sexual experience. Without consent, it is sexual violence.
Some key aspects of consent includes:
Consent is ongoing, and required throughout each interaction. Just because someone is saying yes to one particular sexual act, doesn’t mean they are saying yes to another, and they may change their mind mid-way through.
Consent can be communicated through words, sounds or body-language.
It is always up to the person pursuing the sexual interaction, to ensure consent is there.
Even in long-term relationships, consent is required.
Only adults can consent to other adults, people under the age of consent cannot give consent.
A person must be awake and know what is going on to consent. If someone is drunk, high, passed out, or asleep, consent is not possible.
A worn down no is not a yes. If someone does not seem like they want to, or are not into it, respect their feelings and boundaries, do not try and convince them.
I didn't hear a 'No,' does that mean I have consent?
Not everyone feels comfortable saying no. The lack of a no does not mean a yes. Other signs that you do not have consent can include;
Silence
Avoiding eye contact
Not being responsive
Pushing away
If you are feeling unsure you have consent ask.
What is the age of consent?
In Canada the legal age of consent is 16 years old. The are also some close in age exemptions for youth.
A person under the age of 12, cannot give consent for any sexual activity
Individuals under the age of 18 cannot give consent to individuals in positions of power or authority. This includes roles like, babysitters and teachers.
12-13 year olds can, can only give consent within two years of of their age.
14 or 15 year olds, can only give consent within four years of their age.
Individuals age 16-18 can give consent to any one at any age as long as that person is not in a position of power or authority.
Understanding Sexual Violence
What is sexual violence?
Sexual violence is an umbrella term that includes a wide range of actions including; sexual assault, sexual harassment and child sexual abuse. Key to understanding sexual violence is consent because any sexual action that does not occur without consent is sexual violence.
Understanding Domestic Violence
What is domestic violence?
Domestic Violence is a pattern of coercive and abusive tactics employed by one person in a relationship to gain power and control over another person. It is also called "dating violence" or "intimate partner violence." It can be defined as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner.
What are some signs of domestic violence?
Domestic Violence is physical, sexual, emotional, economic or psychological abusive actions or threats of actions. This includes any behaviors that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure, or wound someone. Domestic violence can happen to anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion, or gender. It can occur within a range of relationships including couples who are married, living together or dating.
