Dragon's Digest

Cover Art by Devon Giardini

Queerness in the Community: A Comparison of MHS & MCAA GSAs
Article by Honor Giardini

Anecdotally, the school environments of Marysville High and MCAA vary significantly. The Literary Magazine Club wanted to contrast GSA club behaviors of both schools. By interviewing both clubs, we wanted to get an idea about how the discrepancy in adversity influences each school's queer communities, along with how their respective GSAs play a role in shaping said communities.

Individuals in both groups reported a lack of acceptance among parents and peers, resulting in mental health struggles and mixed relationships with cultural and religious practices. However, students at MHS faced overwhelmingly higher rates of parental disapproval and bullying. MHS students also reported less receptive administration and school support than MCAA students.


Although most respondents who reported having an accepting family life were MCAA students, we received substantially less information about the personal lives of queer MHS students. "It's easier when you have a family that's supportive, but I think a lot of us don't," said an anonymous MHS student, holding the hand of their partner. " 


"The disparity is like super striking you guys," remarked club advisor, Mr. Harlan, following a conversation with Ms. Noble, a science teacher and GSA advisor at MHS. "Over at charter, we're a little over-represented in terms of numbers because everyone views it as the safe school...like a lot of LGBTQ kids go over there."


Both clubs emphasized 'creating a safe space' as the primary purpose of their club. However, MHS' response was much more literal. Students reported gun threats, citing an incident in which the club member was followed home by another student. MHS club members also reported smaller acts of violence.


"[Our president] had a pride flag torn off their neck, but it was wrapped loosely. We were lucky that time-- because, normally, it's a safety pin around the neck. We didn't have any safety pins that day, so we were very lucky when it came to that because otherwise, the flag would've choked them." 


The administration's response to these incidents at MHS was dismal. "Those specific groups of people decided to bring their like Trump flags and their 'Don't Tread on Me' flags and come up to our booth with them. They're like, 'Hey, you like our flag?'. So the administration decided to just ban all flags," the student added.


Although both clubs had vastly different descriptions of school life, reported parental attitudes towards queerness were similar. An MCAA student provided the following response to an online survey: "Without acceptance, especially at home, a lot of us have to deal with things like anxiety or depression without the support of other people. It's one thing when other teens don't accept you, it's a whole nother when your parents don't."


One respondent, Amie Baeza, an active member of MCAA's GSA, writes, "Being Mexican American, my culture is very heavily mixed with religion." Marysville has a large Latinx population, and this generational conflict is something experienced by many of the local queer folks of color.


Throughout the interview, several MHS students pointed to 'ag kids' as the primary source of conflict. A student stated, "The big majority of our school, the kids that like, live up in the hills, and their parents are very like, country-- like conservative....they seem to like-- they inherit their parent's views."


While describing occasions where homophobia and transphobia have been tolerated in class, Mr. and Ms. Noble said that parents didn't see a problem with their children's behavior. "Yeah, like straight up [we'll call parents and say] 'hey, your kid was being homophobic,' and parents will be like, 'what's the issue with that?'. So a lot of it has to be handled in school."


However, several respondents were able to build a community outside their families, and others reported little to no issues with acceptance after coming out to their parents. "I allowed myself the acceptance I deserve and broke from the traditional sense of my family," Amie Baeza writes. "That doesn't mean it was easy or anything, but my example gave my younger cousin the courage to come out. And that made everything worth it."


Queer people's relationship to faith-- which, in the MHS interview, seemed to consistently circle back to "ag-culture"-- was a frequent topic of discussion in both club interviews. "I grew up in the Mormon church, and I won't say anything about that. But other than that, it's not necessarily an accepting, welcoming place for people who are outside of their norms." Basil, a now-graduated senior, said in an interview with MCAA's GSA.


However, a conversation with MCAA English teacher Mr. Fridrich disproved any rigid assumptions held about the relationship between queerness and faith. "One of the reasons I'm such an ally is because my neighbors growing up were gay pastors... I babysat their son and was in their lives constantly. I was at their house all the time. Two of the greatest men I've ever known my entire life."


The GSA at MHS is vital for its members' mental health. While discussing safety issues at MHS, one student said, "It just creates a bond that's different than if you just make friends otherwise." "Yeah, right on," replied Mr. Harlan, "So, like through the crucible of having to go through a sort of similar experience." Ironically, this bond felt similar to discriminatory social groups described as problematic by MHS GSA members. 


Queer kids have notoriously high rates of suicide. When asked why they thought this was, an MHS student said, "I think that's pretty obvious." MCAA students discussed a lack of familial support and feeling like an outsider.   


"As a queer autistic person," Zach, a graduated senior and former GSA member, said, "The way autism shapes my brain is different. I don't fit into a gender binary."


"I was too fragile in the way that I viewed myself that putting on a dress that Sunday made me feel sick to my stomach," states Basil, describing a childhood experience of going to church on Sundays.


With a lack of support from their families, peers, administration, and communities, it is unsurprising that there is a notion of the necessity of 'protection' for the queer community-- especially its young people. Challenges inherent to young adulthood are magnified by things like gender dysphoria and internalized homophobia, making support in teenage years crucial to the success of queer teens. 


To conclude our conversation, we asked both clubs about allyship or the "S," in GSA. Few straight members were found in either club. When asked why, as a straight person, he decided to join the GSA, an anonymous MHS student stated, "I'm the muscle. I'm just here to protect my friends."

Queerness in Our School: Surveying Students

To follow our interviews, our club sent out a school-wide survey in order to gauge a larger sampling on the experiences of queer students. Here were some of the provided responses.

How has being queer impacted your life?

"Just about all of my social relationships have changed or stopped after I came out as trans. Many people were accepting but my grandparents were not, they consistently deadname me and misgender me, this created a rift between most of my Dad's side of the family except for my cousin and my Dad himself. I'm proud of myself but sometimes life is hard because I know that many people want me dead. Any unsafe places force me into a spot of pretending I'm someone I am not just because I don't 'pass' or fit into society's image of what I should look like," Zachariah (He/They/It), Graduated Class of '23


"I think for a really long time I chose to ignore anything that wasn’t considered “normal”. I was scared of a lot of things but especially when it came to my sexuality. So for a very long time I knew what I felt and just ignored it for the reasons of a) being absolutely terrified of what would happen if I accepted myself and b) not having the terminology for what I felt," Amie (She/They), 12th


"When I was 11 I had a crush on a girl in my class and after realizing I had a crush on her I went and told my mom expecting that there was something wrong with me but she only told me that it was a crush and I shouldn't feel weird about it being a girl. Later in life I learned not everyone felt that way, I've experienced name calling, shunning, and even physical violence because of it," Anonymous (No Preference), 12th


"I grew up surrounded by middle aged lesbians. Queerness is something that hasn’t impacted my life—it is my life. My own sexuality and gender identity isn't something I think about often—it just doesn’t feel applicable to me," Anonymous (She/Her), 11th


"Being queer has impacted my life by being an additional part of growing up, which is already hard to navigate. Everyone has struggles and different experiences which can make growing up more confusing than it already is, and being LGBTQIA+ is a part of that. Learning to embrace these sort of differences or even changes has helped me grow as a person. I think it’s even made me a better person; being queer tends to come with opening your eyes to new things/rethinking the old," Ben (He/Him), 11th


"It’s kind of shocking to be reminded that there’s so much hate outside of what I know," Anonymous (They/Them), 11th


"People use it as an excuse to be disrespectful towards me and treat it as an insult. But I also feel happy being myself and being able to be proud of who I am," Bailey (They/Them), 11th


"It caused a lot of stress for me at one point, because I was worried about my dad and grandmother not accepting me. Turns out, they don't really care that much. Now, I see it as a fun community I'm a part of. I actually met a very close friend of mine through our local LGBTQ organization, Tri-County Diversity," Anonymous (Any), 11th


"As someone who's struggled with my [identity] ever since I was 11, it was extremely hard for me to confront my issues with gender. After transitioning, I feel more free to be myself. The biggest issue has always been the struggle of hiding who I was, especially at home. So yes, I am now free to be who I wish and have been able to become more myself- but I'm also having to continue to hide myself in the [presence] of family," Anonymous (He/Him), 10th


"Having people, friends, teachers, staff, and family members being supportive and there for me it's a bit easier to be myself," Devon (He/Him), 10th


"A lot of hiding for my dad," Cricket (They/Them), 9th


"For me my life is normal because this is just who I am, but being different from the "norm" and being queer has caused me to get bullied relentlessly in the past and lowered my mental health drastically," Tommie (He/They), 9th


"I am trans, and being trans has impacted my life because I get misgendered a lot, and it makes me feel very sad," Kai (He/They), 8th

What makes you feel safe/unsafe on campus?

"MCAA has always been a safe and [accepting] environment during my time here. All 6 years I've been here has been educational and accepting, it allowed me to find language that described me and also provided a perfect environment for me to feel comfortable coming out," Zachariah (He/They/It), Graduated Class of '23


"I’m very grateful for this especially because I don’t feel it anywhere else," Amie (She/They), 12th


"In relation to queerness/atypical gender expression I feel 100% safe on campus. Otherwise, I’m not really a person who feels safe. I’m incredibly nervous. But the support of teachers makes a world of difference for me when it comes to just getting through the day. Shoutout Mr. Harlan!" Anonymous (She/Her), 11th


"This school is such a safe place where anywhere you turn there’s someone who is supportive," Anonymous (They/Them), 11th


"I actually don’t feel unsafe at all. The students are very accepting and a lot are a part of the community. The school staff also actually enforces their zero tolerance policy, which I really appreciate," Spencer (Any), 11th


"I feel safe because it seems the majority of people here are queer in some way too. Also, everyone I've interacted with respects people's names and pronouns," Anonymous (Any), 11th


"[I feel] a bit unsafe in the bathrooms, either it be the normal restrooms by the office or because people in the changing rooms at the MYCC building are inappropriate or try to open stalls there," Devon (He/Him), 10th


"From the first day of school at MCAA I knew that I would be accepted. There are so many other members of the LGBTQIA+ community, and it makes me feel “normal” for once. Also, the fact that some of the teachers’ first questions that they ask when you meet them are 'what are your pronouns/what is your preferred name (if applicable)',” Lei (They/Them), 9th


"This campus is very much different than my old ones, I feel very welcomed and safe here. People ask my pronouns and then actually make an effort to use them which makes me extremely happy. When someone calls out my deadname on attendance and I correct them no one laughs or snickers," Tommie (He/They), 9th


"Having people to relate to makes me feel safe," Cricket (They/Them), 9th


"Things that make me feel safe are the fact that most people around me are like me, and aren't scared to show it. I rarely feel unsafe at my school," Anonymous (He/Him), 9th


"People being mean and bullying me for hanging out with my friends," Stephen (He/Him), 9th


"...How small and open campus is makes me feel unsafe," Maylie (She/Her), 9th


"Safe: knowing there is nobody on campus...Unsafe: fire alarms, bomb threats, all that jazz, it makes me extremely freaked out. [I don't] mean having the fire alarms and stuff, its knowing there might be a fire or a earthquake, or a shooter on campus...the alarms [don't]scare me, its just what they are for," Anonymous (He/She/They), 8th

How do you identify, and what does identity mean to you? Do you think the language used to describe various facets of our identities is important? Why or why not. 

"[Sometimes people like to] force labels onto people without their consent... sometimes these labels are too confining for people, especially if you don't know what you want but I think they are important for those who need or are ready for the security they provide," Zachariah (He/They/It), Graduated Class of '23


"I believe that me as well as everyone in the world is different and that there is no label that will match me because I am me. People find comfort in labels and i respect that but I personally don't," Anonymous (No Preference), 12th


"It makes me feel overwhelmed to have to to stick to what x label says about me. I know what I like and what I don’t like and in my head that’s perfectly fine with me," Amie (She/They), 12th


"I get the value of language in providing a sort of container to pour traits/experiences into, but personally I don’t think there are specific aspects of me that I feel describe me in relation to the world, which is what I think identity is. I’m a person," Anonymous (She/Her), 11th


"I identify as a gay trans male. To me that just means I’m a dude, born seen as not a dude, who likes dudes... I think the language that is used to describe whole or parts of identities can be important, but to me, I don’t really care what I’m called as long as it’s a synonym to the whole dude-dude-dude mess above," Ben (He/Him), 11th


"It's important to have a word or concept that encapsulate how you feel," Anoymous (He/They), 11th


"My identity is important to me but the language I use to describe it isn’t as important. I feel like I can live comfortably without needing to put my identity in a box. As long as I have an understanding of myself, I don’t feel the need to give an answer to anyone else,"  Anonymous (They/Them), 11th


"[It's important] you know what you are, but too many labels is what causes mockery most of the time. So yes, the language describing numerous types of sexualities and genders is important.... but not every little aspect needs a [classifier]. For example, "gray-aromantic". You have a hard time falling in love or experiencing romantic attraction... but only sometimes. It's something that in my opinion, can just be explained rather than classified," Anonymous (He/Him), 10th


"Identity is just what I feel to me," Devon (He/Him), 10th


"For me at least, the language to describe our identity is important to be able to explain it to other people who don't experience what I experience. It's also nice to be able to realize that there's a name for this certain thing about yourself and there's nothing wrong about you. You're not different, you're just not as spoken about as cishet people are," Tommie (He/They), 9th

Queer teenagers experience mental illness more frequently than cis/hetero teenagers. Why do you think this is? Do you think being queer has impacted your mental health? 

"Since birth society at large forces us to conform a certain way, even in accepting homes most people don't learn about queerness till teen years. Being forced into a box at a young age makes many people believe stepping out of that box will be the end of the world," Zachariah (He/They/It), Graduated Class of '23


"I think this one is pretty obvious," Amie (She/They), 12th


"Being bullied definitely contributed to it and a feeling of hopelessness in our society has contributed to it," Anonymous (No Preference), 12th


"Being queer can be isolating, cause hardship, etc, so it makes sense that mental illness is more common in the community," Ben (He/Him), 11th


"To put it simply, it’s fear. You see stories of people getting kicked out by their parents or brutally beaten for being a part of the LGBTQ+ community and it causes many problems... The one thing that I am holding onto is the fact that I will grow older and move out and be able to be myself," Spencer (Any), 11th


"I don't think being queer itself is what impacted my mental health but instead the interactions between me and others when I reveal that I am queer, along with my parents not acknowledging who I am," Bailey (They/Them), 11th


"The primary reason for this is [it] tends to be internal struggles of acceptance, and external acceptance. Everybody as a child wants to be normal, and being "different" is shunned. When I was young, being gay was "bad." Abnormal, not something to be proud of. It's hard to accept who you are when you don't feel like yourself to begin with, and teenage hormones don't help the situation...Essentially, I have to keep myself hidden and play a part just so I am not disowned. That's a hard burden to carry at my age. I still love my family, but they wouldn't love me if they knew who I was. They are the main reason I, myself, suffer from a few mental illnesses," Anonymous (He/Him), 10th


"Without acceptance, especially at home, a lot of us have to deal with things like anxiety or depression without the support of other people," Lei (They/Them), 9th


"Throughout our recent history queer people have been demonized and almost taboo to talk about. Only recently have we started to get laws passed to protect us and give us rights such as marriage, and some countries haven't done even that. A big contribution is queer people are almost never talked about in most schools and common media. Because many people don't know about queer people and what they've had to experience they grow up with offensive tropes that they see in movies or that their conservative relatives have talked about... Many people also aren't accepting and queer people often find it easier to end their lives then to be able to find an accepting environment... It's one thing when other teens don't accept you, it's a whole nother when your parents don't," Tommie (He/They), 9th


"I think the reason queer [teenagers] experience mental illness more frequently might be because the majority feels that it's not ok in some way to be out of the norm," Anonymous (He/Him), 9th


"Maybe because some people aren't very welcoming…and say it's a trend or just a phase," Elyas (Any), 8th

What's your experience with religion? In what ways has it positively or negatively impacted your life?

"Still going to church with friends or other family I had been told to "not act gay" due to the judgment either the person I was going with would receive or because the people around me would not be safe around... I don't know what I believe but I know I want a community that accepts me as I am rather than forcing me to pretend who I'm not," Zachariah (He/They/It), Graduated Class of '23


"Being Mexican American, my culture is very heavily mixed with religion. I was raised to believe homophobia was what we needed to stand for. It’s what God wanted but even more importantly it’s what our traditional values said. We value family over anything else and therefore all of their traditions and expectations. As expected, that deeply hurt me and everyone around me who was just like me. I was scared to say anything about what I was feeling and allowed the toxic cycle to continue. I did my 2 years of Sunday school and did my first communion as the Catholic Church and and my mother wanted. It wasn’t until quarantine that’s I just couldn’t keep supporting an organization that stood for telling me I wasn’t allowed to be myself. I allowed myself the acceptance I deserve and broke from the traditional sense of my family. That doesn’t mean it was easy or anything but my example gave the courage to my younger cousin to come out. And that made everything worth it," Amie (She/They), 12th


"I like the idea of universal unconditional love and think that principal could do a lot of good... I don’t think religion and queerness are mutually exclusive. However there is a lot of work to be done on this front if we want to repair the damage Christianity in particular has inflicted on queer people," Anonymous (She/Her), 11th


"I am very [fortunate] to have very accepting parents despite religion. Both sides of my family are very religious but I haven’t had to deal with hate from them directly," Anonymous (They/Them), 11th


"My grandmother and aunt both attempted to raise me as Christian, but I just.. didn't vibe. However, I would say it has positively impacted my life, as I made friends and went on fun trips through my old church's youth group," Anonymous (Any), 11th


"I am a bisexual non-cis Christian. I recently got into religion and I think that people who are Christian miss intemperate who Jesus is. Jesus loves people no matter what (of course with exceptions) I think by being lgbtq it brought me closer to God and it makes me at peace knowing he loves me and loves everyone like I should do," Danielle (She/They), 11th


"I grew up in a very religious family; my grandparents are both pastors. It has not positively impacted my life in the slightest, I can say that. And the religion itself is not at fault. I actually think religion is a great thing, something to rely on when there is nothing left," Spencer (Any), 11th


"I grew up in a household that never went to church and know almost nothing about religion, though my mom was raised Mormon and has religious trauma," Bailey (They/Them), 11th


"Religion is a negative factor in my life. I do not hate religion, because some people use it for comfort. Where the line is drawn is when people force it on others, force their children into it, use it in politics, and use it as a shield to be closed minded... Constantly being told I can't do things because "Thats not what Jesus would do" is what drove me away from Christianity. I've never been perfect, but being punished for something the bible says is "wrong" has negatively impacted my mental health for years," Anonymous (He/Him), 10th


"I was raised into the belief system that “God made one man and one woman, and anybody who says otherwise is swayed by the devil and is not somebody you should associate yourself with.” This really messed with me growing up... The ones that weren’t trying to harass me were trying to “fix” me, and I couldn’t even talk about my struggles to any adult figure in my life because I was scared that they would judge me or put me in a mental hospital," Lei (They/Them), 9th


"When I would be told religious ideals, even when I was very young, personally I never believed in them. I never had that scary moment like some of my friends have where I was scared I would go to hell if I was gay... That for me is very sad, but I have not had it as bad as some people who had religion impact their lives way more," Tommie (He/They), 9th


"As being Christian myself, I know that most if not all Christians don't believe that being queer is an acceptable lifestyle," Bo (He/Him), 8th


"I'm a [Christian]...I believe God...my parents read the Bible and there is nothing in there that says being queer is a sin," Elyas (Any), 8th

If you've come out to your family, how did they react? How does their support or absence of it impact you at school?

"After I came out, the hate I received from that side of the family left me hurting and I stopped going to my online classes and failed a lot of my sophomore year due to my depression and lack of motivation," Zachariah (He/They/It), Graduated Class of '23


"I’m lucky to have had a really supportive family. I first came out to my sister, Abby, and she immediately helped me with a name which we picked together. My mom sprung into action with steps (clothes, name changes, etc). School doesn’t feel like a separate life because of their support which I know a lot of people struggle with having," Ben (He/Him), 11th


"I've come out to my father, he said I was faking it and what I am isn't real. And I've come out to my mom who didn't really seem bothered, she just said "alright". I think the stark difference between these responses has really torn me in some ways and it [is] on my mind a lot, at school as well," Anonymous (He/They), 11th


"My mom did not care, but my grandparents did. They gave me a whole talk on how I was disappointing God by liking girls. The absence of support doesn’t completely affect me at school, but it makes me feel like I can’t do the same things my straight counterparts or LGBTQ classmates with supportive family do in fear of being outed," Spencer (Any), 11th


"My parents were accepting of my being queer but not so much queer-gender/agender. This sent me into a bad place for some time but it has leveled out to a controlled state of mind," Bailey (They/Them), 11th


"However, I can say what would happen if I FULLY came out. Disowned. Sent to Christian therapy, taken out of school, all my items taken and if ever given back, strictly monitored. School is my safe space, so the lack of support doesn't affect me there, because I'm free to be who I want," Anonymous (He/Him), 10th


"My parents would probably be disappointed and question where they went wrong in raising me, the absence of their support makes me upset but there's not much I can do about it so I leave it be," Anonymous (She/Her), 10th


"When I came out to my family as trans and nonbinary (and changed my name) my mom was the one who acted the most negatively. She said it made her cry to use my chosen name and that it hurt her that I would've even thought of changing my name to begin with... My dad on the other hand didn't really care. At the time he was at work quite a lot so he rarely had a chance to even use my name, but he still sat by while my mom said those hurtful things. Since then my mom has learned more about the queer community and has become way more accepting and my whole family uses my chosen name. My deadname feels so alien to me now and im very happy I have the luck to have an accepting family... Now since theyre more accepting I can change my name in the school system which makes things 100 times more easier and makes me happy. My friends also don't have to worry about which name to use in front of my parents anymore," Tommie (He/They), 9th

Anything else you'd like to say? (i.e what was coming out like, are there any questions you'd wish we asked, ect.) 

"To all queer/lgbtq+ people: you are strong enough to make it through this world. Society may push us down but together we are strong enough to push back and change society. We are growing up and shaking societal norms, the world may be bad now but we can make it better. Keep your friends safe and offer to help those you can. The only way time moves is forward, move with it," Zachariah (He/They/It), Graduated Class of '23


"I guess this is a message to all the people that didn't get as lucky as I did with my family and friends: There are people out [there], sometimes when your family isn't accepting you don't need to convince them otherwise or hide. For your own safety don't put yourself in [harm's] way if that's at stake but make sure you are true to yourself," Anonymous (No preference), 12th

Special thanks to Mr. Harlan, our club advisor, for delegating and arranging these opportunities for our club, and to Ms. and Mr. Noble, for allowing us to spend time with them and their students. Another thanks to all who were interviewed (both MHS' and MCAA's GSA), students who took the time to respond thoughtfully to our forms, all other staff who assisted, and those involved in the Literary Magazine Club. This edition required a lot of collaborative effort and we are very appreciative to be able to produce the November '23 Dragon's Digest!