Melrose Dialogue
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Embedded Files
Having Conversations That Bring Us Closer Together
Planners Start Here:
Planners Start Here:
1. First Steps.pdfOur Shared Purpose
Our Shared Purpose
To strengthen the cohesiveness of the Melrose community through building trust, respect, understanding, and belonging into the fabric of our relationships and interactions.
To strengthen the cohesiveness of the Melrose community through building trust, respect, understanding, and belonging into the fabric of our relationships and interactions.
Our Vision
Our Vision
We envision one Melrose open to, embracing of, and safe for each and every participant and member of the community; Where all worldviews are treated with respect even when we may not see eye to eye.
We envision one Melrose open to, embracing of, and safe for each and every participant and member of the community; Where all worldviews are treated with respect even when we may not see eye to eye.
Our Mission
Our Mission
We work to create mutual understanding of one another through Facilitated Reflective Dialogue. Participants feel heard, understood and valued by others who may see the world from a different viewpoint. With increased ability to understand one another, we deal more effectively with issues that create tension and division.
We work to create mutual understanding of one another through Facilitated Reflective Dialogue. Participants feel heard, understood and valued by others who may see the world from a different viewpoint. With increased ability to understand one another, we deal more effectively with issues that create tension and division.
Planning Team Communication Agreements
Planning Team Communication Agreements
COMMUNICATION AGREEMENT: “A consensus on what every person in our group needs from each other and commits to each other in order to feel safe, supported, open, productive and trusting… SO THAT we can do our best work and achieve our common vision.”
Intentions: spirit, attitudes or intentions that you hope people would embody in these conversations.
Intentions: spirit, attitudes or intentions that you hope people would embody in these conversations.
We will respect others
We will treat each other with appreciation
We will speak from a spirit of collaborative learning
We will listen to understand, not to correct, attack or win
We will be open to understanding the impact of our speaking
We will come ready to speak thoughtfully and to take in the other
We will seek to understand one another, especially when differences surface
Actions: observable behaviors that indicate whether the spirit of dialogue is being maintained.
Actions: observable behaviors that indicate whether the spirit of dialogue is being maintained.
We will honor time limits - in sessions and breaks
We will check assumptions by asking questions from curiosity vs judgment / skepticism
We will “share airtime”, make sure that everyone has a chance to say something
We will turn cell phones and pagers off / vibrate. No social media during meetings
We will not interrupt; allowing others to finish their speaking before we speak
We will speak one at a time. No side conversations (including virtual chat)
We will refrain from personal attacks, judgmental statements, and assumptions
We will refrain from contradicting or demeaning the feelings and experiences of others
We will maintain confidentiality - refraining from sharing any identifiable information with others not part of the meeting / event
We will “pass,” or “pass for now,” if unwilling / not ready to speak, and support others’ right to “pass”
We will speak for ourselves (speaking as “I”, not “we” or “they”) neither waiting for someone else to speak for us nor speaking on behalf of anyone else
Is there anything that anyone wants to modify? Add? Delete? Simplify?
Are these acceptable to everyone? (please indicate by show of hands)
How will we help each other abide by these agreements?
Our Values
Our Values
- COMMITMENT: For a variety of valid reasons, it has been difficult for us all to come together at the same time. It also seems important that we shift our meetings to focus on practicing the RSD model.
- OWNERSHIP: While many aspects of this Kick-Off event have been planned for us... we as facilitators need to own our commitment to learning the material presented to us in our training. (SEE ATTACHED FOR OUR TRAINING PACKET) Please bring this packet to meetings moving forward - it has all the information we need to be successful in our Kick-Off Event and even in our First "Community Conversation."
- MODESTY (GOOD ENOUGH) vs. PERFECTION: We need to be mindful of our individual and collective bandwidth and tolerance levels. Then we need to be checking in on this in our meetings (see proposed meeting format below). Life happens for all of us...can we extend grace to ourselves and each other?
- COMMUNITY NEEDS: Let's continue to talk this project up, share with our neighbors...collect feedback, learn what people in the community believe they need from us as facilitators ready to help folks have difficult conversations - email this to info@melrosedialogue.org such that we can capture this important info.
- SLOWING DOWN: Let's make more space to PAUSE and digest conversation as we have it - resisting the impulse to jump ahead.
- HARD CONVERSATIONS: As we learn and work together, we will say things that might inadvertently upset someone in the group - Let's make space to call "OUCH" - or use a "PSA" Redirection (Purpose, Slip-up, Alternative) as outlined on page 48 or our training packet. Our ability to have hard conversations with each other will REALLY REALLY help us feel ready for bringing this tool to the community.
- OK TO STEP OUT: As this project evolves we are building clarity on what is required from each one of us... This may not line up with what you had in mind. Please be clear with yourself and us on how you can best participate in this effort - spanning from being a frequent facilitator to showing up as a community participant.
Our Operating Assumptions
Our Operating Assumptions
+ Ideas are in constant shift as we learn - nothing in this project is ABSOLUTE or STATIC - and this project will evolve as we evolve over time
+ Ideas are in constant shift as we learn - nothing in this project is ABSOLUTE or STATIC - and this project will evolve as we evolve over time
+ We aim to be inclusive and accessible to ALL = making adaptations / pivots to meet folks on their terms / turf
+ We aim to be inclusive and accessible to ALL = making adaptations / pivots to meet folks on their terms / turf
+ As planners, we strive for consent versus consensus - recognizing our goal to bring multiple perspectives together rather than convince everyone to share the same beliefs
+ As planners, we strive for consent versus consensus - recognizing our goal to bring multiple perspectives together rather than convince everyone to share the same beliefs
Effort 1:
Effort 1:
Train group of Facilitators
Train group of Facilitators
(Completed: June 16/17, 2023)
Planning team to identify broad cross section of community members who agree to be trained in Reflective Structured Dialogue.
Effort 2:
Effort 2:
Getting Organized
Getting Organized
Meeting: Monday, 12/11/2023 @ Doug's House
What are we doing?
How are we doing it?
Who is participating?
What tools are we using?
Effort 3:
Effort 3:
Kickoff Event to Educate / Inform Community
Kickoff Event to Educate / Inform Community
Target: February 2024
Event to involve "Key Community Stakeholders" (see spreadsheet)
Part 1:
Presentation explaining what "Reflective Structured Dialogue" is and is NOT.
Area communities share their experience with the model
EP Consultants present to help with presentation.
Part 2:
Experiential introduction to the "Reflective Structured Dialogue" using pre-scripted questions, and guided by trained facilitators.
Effort 4:
Effort 4:
Plan 1st Community Dialogue (topic? / date)
Plan 1st Community Dialogue (topic? / date)
Target: Early 2024
Topic & Questions TBD
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