A Nation to Fall

Rea De Leon

Bang! I could hear it from afar. As I walk around the area with the land eating up my ankles while I carry this heavy armor to ensure my safety in order to see another day. While I pondered on that thought, I was surrounded. Surrounded like a rooster in play, with my heart beating thinking that this was it.

“Hey!” I heard the guy yell at me. I looked around and saw 5 individuals covered in the colors of green, brown, and black, similar to what I am wearing. “Lower your gear and put your hands up!” Frightened with the voice of the man, I did what I was told to do, praying to my God and wishing upon my Nation to put me in no harm.

Clear, that is what I am as I see them fumbling about and making sure that the area is safe for no missed bullets and misfiring that may occur. In this situation right here I can’t help control myself from shaking. Is this because of fear, guilt, anger, sympathy, or straight up a  traumatic experience?

I spoke up loud and clear to what my intentions are, who I am, what are they going to do, but I was silenced. I was silenced by their sly and sleazy remarks that they do not care who or what I am, that they aren’t afraid to go all out right now if I make even just the smallest move. With the tension in the air I knew that I had to diffuse it yet the actions I will make next will probably be the last one.

A life is at its most risk now, why shouldn’t I fight for it? I went for it. That moment right there was the one that jolted me awake. I came to my instincts, and heard all the frantic yelling in the background. I was confused with all the shouting and screaming of pleas to stop. I had no idea what they were talking about, all I knew is that I am holding my hands around my back causing no scene at all.

Curious as I was, I decided to see the sight before me. To my surprise, I thought it was just a simple nightmare, a recurring episode of mine ever since the war that I’ve endured. I looked at my right hand and saw a tag stating my name, age, address, and a 4 letter word, PTSD. I heard it again! “Hey!” I jumped and reached onto something on to me and felt that it was my bag and before I knew it “Bang!”.

I fell to the floor not knowing, even one thing, what happened to me. I saw red, I threw my bag onto the ground and before I closed my eyes, I heard the man say “He’s clean”, pure horrid can be heard from him. I wonder if it is my carelessness that got me in trouble or the mere fact their foolish mistakes. Nonetheless, I can now close my eyes and let the world think.